LEARN WOMEN'S ENGLISH

Yes = No 

No = Yes 

Maybe = No 

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry 

We need = I want 

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now. 

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later 

We need to talk = I need to complain 

 Sure ... go ahead = I don't want you to 

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! 

You're ... so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot 

You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? 

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs 

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house 

I want new curtains = ... and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper 

Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there! 

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep 

Do you love me = I'm going to ask for something expensive 

How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like 

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV 

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful 

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me 

I'm not yelling = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important