25 Signs Showing You Might Be Canadian

1. You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".

2. You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine on the chesterfield."

3. You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.

4. You drink Pop, not Soda.

5. You know that a Mickey and 24's mean, "party at the camp, eh!!!"

6. You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars.

7. You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.

8. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.

9. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.

10. You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.

11. You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.

12. You brag to Americans that; Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion & Mike Myers are Canadians.

13. You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!

14. You know what a toque is.

15. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

16. You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed".

17. Your local newspaper covers the national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.

18. You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road work.

19. You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.

20. You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.

21. You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan".

22. You perk up when you hear the theme song from 'Hockey Night in Canada'.

23. You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.

24. "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite than, "Huh?"


25. You actually understand these jokes, and forward this post to all of your Canadian friends! Then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them!

*Thanks, Vil

RECOGNIZING A STROKE - A true story

Susie is recouping at an incredible pace for someone with a massive stroke all because Sherry saw Susie stumble - -that is the key that isn't mentioned below - and then she asked Susie the 3 questions. So simple - this literally saved Susie's life - - Suzie failed all three so 911 was called.

Even though she had normal blood pressure readings and did not appear to be having a stroke, as she could converse to some extent, the Paramedics took her to the hospital right away.

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify.

Unfortunately,the lack of awareness spells disaster.

The stroke victim may suffer brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

*Ask the individual to SMILE.
*Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS.
*Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE.
*And, if you have one, give them an aspirin right away.

If they have trouble with any of these tasks, call 9-1-1 immediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

After discovering that a group of non-medical volunteers could identify facial weakness, arm weakness and speech problems, researchers urged the general public to learn the three questions.

They presented their conclusions at the American Stroke Association annual meeting last February. Widespread use of this test could result in prompt diagnosis and treatment of the stroke and prevent brain damage.

A cardiologist says if everyone who hears of this information , let's other people know, you can bet that at least one life will be saved. Who knows, one day maybe this information will help save your life.

*Thanks, Daryn!

Aerobics For Your Brain

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You know you are addicted to coffee if ...

You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You sleep with your eyes open.
You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You've worn out your third pair of tennis shoes this week.
Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
You chew on other people's fingernails.
The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
You're so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas.
You can type sixty words per minute with your feet.
You can jump-start your car without cables.
You don't sweat, you percolate.
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
People get dizzy just watching you.
Instant coffee takes too long.
You channel surf faster without a remote.
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
You short out motion detectors.
You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
You help your dog chase its tail.
You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.
You ski uphill.
You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.
You answer the door before people knock.
You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.

Don't Let Allergies Keep Your Child Inside This Summer

(ARA) - "My favorite part of summer is when the whole neighborhood gets together to play a huge game of tag," exclaims 11-year-old Abigail Lafferty from Pennsylvania. "That and no school for three months!"

For kids - and their parents - who have waited months to get outside to play, warm and sunny days mean it's time for tee ball, skateboarding, swimming and tons of outdoor fun.
But for children who suffer from seasonal allergies, warmer weather can mean the onset of symptoms such as sneezing, itchy, watery eyes, runny nose and itchy throat.

"More than 6 million children suffer from seasonal allergies that can be triggered during outdoor physical activity," says nationally renowned pediatrician Dr. Jennifer Trachtenberg, who is a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics.

A mother of three and a clinical instructor at Mount Sinai Medical Center in New York, Dr. Trachtenberg recommends giving your child an allergy medication that is designed for children, like Children's Benadryl(R) Allergy Fastmelt(R) tablets, which can help relieve allergy symptoms and get them back outside. The easy-to-use, rapidly dissolving tablets offer an effective, painless solution for getting your child to take his medication.

Allergies are not the only thing that can curtail summer fun. Dehydration, skinned knees, stinging insects and sunburn can also prevent your child from enjoying outdoor activities.

"Before you send your kids out to play, be sure to take a few common-sense precautions," says Dr. Trachtenberg.

Here are some summer outdoor safety tips for parents based not only on her years of practicing medicine, but also her experience as a mom to two young boys and a little girl.

1. Don't get burned - Apply sunscreen to children generously and let it soak in for 15 to 30 minutes before they go outside. Cover all exposed skin, including ears, nose and neck and apply an SPF 15 lip screen as well. Make sure to reapply every two hours, or more often if kids are sweating or swimming.

2. Beware of poisonous weeds - Know how to identify poison ivy, poison sumac and poison oak - all are plants that produce a sap that can cause a red, swollen rash or blisters. Poison ivy has bright green leaves consisting of three irregular leaflets. Small greenish flowers grow in bunches attached to the main stem. Poison oak also has three leaflets, but the lobes are much more deeply cut. Poison sumac has green flowers and loose clusters of white fruits.

3. Bee careful - Keep bees away by having kids avoid perfumed soaps, shampoos and deodorants and wearing light-colored clothes, which attract fewer bees than dark clothes. If a bee does land on your child, tell him to act like a statue - swatting at a bee can encourage it to sting. If your child gets stung, wash the area with soap and water and apply ice to reduce the swelling.

4. Stay hydrated - Make sure your kids drink adequate liquids before, during and after outdoor activities. Kids can get easily dehydrated when they spend a lot of time outdoors, so know the symptoms: thirst, weakness, headaches, dark-colored urine or a slight decrease in body weight.

5. Minor scrapes - When your child ends up with skinned knees or elbows, stop the bleeding with direct pressure, and remember to follow the 3C's: Clean the wound with a gentle soap and water; Coat with an antibiotic ointment to prevent infection and help reduce scarring; and Cover the wound with a sterile bandage to protect it from further injury.

Keeping these simple guidelines in mind will ensure that both kids and parents have a fun, relaxing summer.

For more information on seasonal allergy prevention or Children's Benadryl Allergy Fastmelt tablets, visit www.benadrylusa.com .

300,000 attend Gay Pride parade in Paris

300,000 attend Gay Pride parade in Paris

Some 300,000 people attended the Gay Pride parade on Saturday afternoon in Paris, claiming adoption and marriage rights for homosexual couples.

"Couples and parents: equality now" is the theme of this year's Gay Pride. Alain Piriou, spokesman of the Inter-LGBT association, which is LGBT's main vehicle for speaking with the government for LGBT equal rights and which organizes the Gay

Pride parade, called the French government to change the law and to authorize marriage and adoption for homosexual couples.

Some dignitaries, including Paris Mayor Bertrand Delanoe and National secretary of the Green party Yann Wehrling, also called for legislation.

At 4:00 p.m. (local time), the parade stopped midway to keep three-minute silence dedicated to victims of AIDS.

Source: Xinhua

S O M E T I M E S

Sometimes...
when you cry...
no one sees your tears.






Sometimes...
when you are in pain...
no one sees your hurt.






Sometimes...
when you are worried...
no one sees your stress.





Sometimes...
when you are happy...
no one sees your smile.

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But FART!! just ONE time...

And everybody knows!!

Gotcha!! You thought it was going to be one of those heart-touching stories!

*Auntie 'M'

Blessed Are...

BLESSED ARE THE CRACKED;
FOR IT IS THEY WHO LET IN THE LIGHT

Let's see if I understand how the world works lately...

If a man cuts his finger off while slicing salami at work, he blames the restaurant.

If you smoke three packs a day for 40 years and die of lung cancer, your family blames the tobacco company.

If your neighbor crashes into a tree while driving home drunk, he blames the bartender.

If your grandchildren are brats without manners, you blame television.

If your friend is shot by a deranged madman, you blame the gun manufacturer.

And if a crazed person breaks into the cockpit and tries to kill the pilot at 35,000 feet, and the passengers kill him instead, the mother of the crazed deceased blames the airline.

I must have lived too long to understand the world as it is anymore.

So, if I die while my old, wrinkled butt is parked in front of this computer, I want you to blame Bill Gates...okay?

*Auntie 'M'