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Friday, October 31, 2008

Samhain*

samhain

And the fires
Shall burn
And the wheel of life
Shall turn
And the dead will come home, on Samhain

And then
The night sky
On a lunar light
midnight
And the dead will come home, on Samhain

Little children
Dress like beasts
In the lamp-lit
Dark streets
And the dead come alive, on Samhain

Come away
From this island earth
Come back to
The moment of your birth
And the dead come alive, on Samhain

Ever since
The dawn of time
This day has been for them
Lay your minds on the line
And await the dead, on Samhain

When the wall
Grows thin
Allows the dead
To come in
So await the dead, on Samhain

I will see you, come Samhain

------------------
Glen Whitman, Gather.com

*Pronounced: SOW-in (as in "cow"), (or sometimes sew-WIN)
For more pagan pronunciations, click here.
**Read about Samhain

Happy Halloween!


It just isn't Halloween without a full moon!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Bowling For Cats

Bowling for cats!

Bowling for cats! Click here to play
Click above to play - The Wizard scored 66 and 64 cats respectively. Record your score! Put your scores in the comments!!

*Thanks, Daryn

Make it so! - The Star Trek Apartment

You know, we all say we'd like to have our own transporter rooms, but so few of us ever bother to make one. Interior design genius Tony Alleyne (www.24thcid.com) owes a tremendous debt to "Star Trek: The Next Generation," not only for inspiring his insanely wonderful apartment, but also for generating enough mainstream acceptance of the franchise to entice non Betazoid women through the door.

Alleyne used Vellman digital audio playback modules to provide authentic ST sound effects, plus Vossystems voice-activation gear and loads of AEI Security Systems remote controls. No word on whether he hires a flunky in a red shirt to stage spark-showered deaths at parties. Located in the neutral zone of Hincley, Leicestershire in the UK, Alleyne recently posted a stellar $1 million USD asking price for his unearthly domicile on eBay. Say, wasn't money supposed to disappear by the 24th century?

To view his apartment, click below:

click here

The Love Doctor


The Love Doctor Have a question nagging you in the LOVE department?

Ask The Love Doctor! Just click on The Picture of The Love Doctor at the left of the page and email me.

I will pass your question to The Love Doctor and if your question is relevant, you could get it posted here on 'OZ'!

The Wizard (on behalf of The Love Doctor)

The Magic Gopher

Magic Gopher - Click here

Click Above.

If you can't figure it out, The Wizard has the answer! Email me by clicking on my picture at the top of 'OZ' and I will send you the trick.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

There is no fix for stupid.


There is no fix for stupid.
I could have sworn I hit the brake pedal!
Car upside down in the bay - see guy standing on it? Call out the wrecker!

There is no fix for stupid.
Coming back up...coming...coming

There is no fix for stupid.

Coming...almost there!

There is no fix for stupid.

Ooops!

There is no fix for stupid.

I could have sworn I set the brakes on that truck !Time to get a Bigger Wrecker!

There is no fix for stupid.


Ok, we got the car...let's get the other wrecker now!

There is no fix for stupid.

O...O...oohhh No!!

There is no fix for stupid.
There is no fix for stupid.
There is no fix for stupid.
Who's gonna explain this one to the insurance guys?

SEE...your day has not been so bad after all...


*Thanks, Daryn

Jest Jokes...


A husband asks: Why do you weep and snuffle over a TV program and the imaginary sadness of people you have never met?

Wife: For the same reason you scream and yell when a man you don’t know makes a touchdown.

HYUK!

Three men were discussing at a bar about coincidences. The first man said, " my wife was reading a "tale of two cities" and she gave birth to twins"

"That’s funny", the second man remarked, "my wife was reading 'the three musketeers' and she gave birth to triplets"

The third man shouted, "Good God, I have to rush home!"

When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves"!!!

HYUK!

A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"

"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"

He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."

The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."

The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"

At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"

HYUK!

A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

HYUK!

A pregnant woman gets into a car accident and falls into a deep coma.

Asleep for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your brother came in and named them."

The woman thinks to herself, "Oh no, not my brother -- he's an idiot!" Expecting the worst, she asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?"

"Denise," the doctor says.

The new mother thinks, "Wow, that's not a bad name! Guess I was wrong about my brother. I like Denise!" Then she asks the doctor, "What's the boy's name?"

The doctor replies, DeNephew.

HYUK!

True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:

Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"

Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"

Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"

Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"

Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."

Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped. It's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"

Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it.“

At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn't stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive!

HYUK!

An inexperienced real estate salesman asked his boss if he could refund the deposit to an angry customer who had discovered that the lot he had bought was under water.

“What kind of salesman are you?” the boss scolded. “Get out there and sell him a boat.”


Woo! HOO!!

Pagan festival draws interest


Festival celebrates cultural heritage not religious

Samhain BlessingsMILAN (Reuters Life!) - Milan will sweep aside its Roman and Papal heritage this weekend to celebrate Samhain, popularly regarded as the Celtic New Year, at a festival which highlights Italy's awakened interest in its pagan past.

The city's Sforzesco Castle will host crafts like weaving, coining money and making chain mail to a backdrop of music from Italy, Ireland, Scotland and Spain. More than 100,000 visitors are expected to come to see Celtic warriors clash in battle.

The focus is strictly cultural heritage, not religion, said Emanuela Magni, co-organizer of the event.

"It teaches how even with the passage of time, there are some concepts of the universe that have endured here," Magni said, noting that the Celtic holy tradition of Samhain was a precursor to holidays like All Saints Day and All Souls Day.

But as Italy uncovers its pre-Christian roots, it is also awakening pagan practice. "Indeed something is afoot here quietly but determinedly, and it appears to be a movement," wrote American religious studies researcher Francesca Howell, in a paper published last month by the international journal of pagan studies, Pomegranate.

Italy has deep roots in witchcraft, or "stregoneria," Howell said in an interview. But its current pagan movement echoes earlier trends in the British Isles and America. Italy's pagans have coalesced around movements like feminism and environmentalism.

"It truly is a different cup of tea, or different cauldron of herbs, if you will," she said.

Melwyn, a 23-year-old Milanese secretary who gave only her Celtic name, fits the movement's demographics.

A Celtic re-enactor, she read about Wicca as a teenager and discovered practitioners at the Samhain festival four years ago.

"A lot of people are close to Wicca without knowing it, especially re-enactors" she said. "They believe in it but don't acknowledge it."

Organizers say numbers are elusive, but using sources like mailing lists, event registration and journal subscriptions, they place their ranks at between 2,000 and10,000.

The founder of Milan's Circle of the Crossroads, Davide Marre, remembers when his group numbered "four cats;' an expression for virtually nobody. Six years later, he has 200 members, with conferences, study groups, a magazine, a book, even a monthly bar fest called the Witches' Caf De.

Given Italy's past, Marre said he is not surprised by the revival.

"Italy is the land of the gods," he said.


Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Christian Right intensifies attack on Obama


by The Associated Press

Obama(Washington) Terrorist strikes on four American cities. Russia rolling into Eastern Europe. Israel hit by a nuclear bomb. Gay marriage in every state. The end of the Boy Scouts.

All are plausible scenarios if Democrat Barack Obama is elected president, according to a new addition to the campaign conversation called “Letter from 2012 in Obama’s America,” produced by the conservative Christian group Focus on the Family Action.

The imagined look into the future is part of an escalation in rhetoric from Christian right activists who are trying to paint Obama in the worst possible terms as the campaign heads into the final stretch and polls show the Democrat ahead.

Although hard-edge attacks are common late in campaigns, the tenor of the strikes against Obama illustrate just how worried conservative Christian activists are about what should happen to their causes and influence if Democrats seize control of both Congress and the White House.

“It looks like, walks like, talks like and smells like desperation to me,” said the Rev. Kirbyjon Caldwell of Houston, an Obama supporter who backed President Bush in the past two elections. The Methodist pastor called the 2012 letter “false and ridiculous.” He said it showed that some Christian conservative leaders fear that Obama’s faith-based appeals to voters are working.

Like other political advocacy groups, Christian right groups often raise worries about an election’s consequences to mobilize voters. In the early 1980s, for example, direct mail from the Moral Majority warned that Congress would turn a blind eye to “smut peddlers” dangling pornography to children.

“Everyone uses fear in the last part of a campaign, but evangelicals are especially theologically prone to those sorts of arguments,” said Clyde Wilcox, a Georgetown University political scientist. “There’s a long tradition of predicting doom and gloom.”

But the tone this election year is sharper than usual and the volume has turned up as Nov. 4 nears.

Steve Strang, publisher of Charisma magazine, a Pentecostal publication, titled one of his recent weekly e-mails to readers, “Life As We Know It Will End If Obama is Elected.”

Strang said gay rights and abortion rights would be strengthened in an Obama administration, taxes would rise and “people who hate Christianity will be emboldened to attack our freedoms.”

Separately, a group called the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission has posted a series of videos on its site and on YouTube called “7 Reasons Barack Obama is not a Christian.”

The commission accuses Obama of “subtle diabolical deceit” in saying he is Christian, while he believes that people can be saved through other faiths.

But among the strongest pieces this year is Focus on the Family Action’s letter which has been posted on the group’s Web site and making the e-mail rounds. Signed by “A Christian from 2012,” it claims a series of events could logically happen based on the group’s interpretation of Obama’s record, Democratic Party positions, recent court rulings and other trends.

Among the claims:

- A 6-3 liberal majority Supreme Court that results in rulings like one making gay marriage the law of the land and another forcing the Boy Scouts to “hire homosexual scoutmasters and allow them to sleep in tents with young boys.” (In the imagined scenario, The Boy Scouts choose to disband rather than obey).

- A series of domestic and international disasters based on Obama’s “reluctance to send troops overseas.” That includes terrorist attacks on U.S. soil that kill hundreds, Russia occupying the Baltic states and Eastern European countries including Poland and the Czech Republic, and al-Qaida overwhelming Iraq.

- Nationalized health care with long lines for surgery and no access to hospitals for people over 80.

The goal was to “articulate the big picture,” said Carrie Gordon Earll, senior director of public policy for Focus on the Family Action. “If it is a doomsday picture, then it’s a realistic picture,” she said.

Obama favors abortion rights and supports civil unions for same-sex couples, but says states should make their own decisions about marriage. He said he would intensify diplomatic pressure on Iran over its nuclear ambitions and add troops in Afghanistan.

On taxes, Obama has proposed an increase on the 5 percent of taxpayers who make more than $250,000 a year and advocates cuts for those who make less. His health care plan calls for the government to subsidize coverage for millions of Americans who otherwise couldn’t afford it.

One of the clear targets of this latest conservative Christian push against the Democrat is younger evangelicals who might be considering him. The letter posits that young evangelicals provide the margin that let Obama defeat John McCain. But Margaret Feinberg, a Denver-area evangelical author, predicted failure.

“Young evangelicals are tired - like most people at this point in the election - and rhetoric which is fear-based, strong-arms the listener, and states opinion as fact will only polarize rather than further the informed, balanced discussion that younger voters are hungry for,” she said.

In an interview, Strang said there are fewer state ballot measures to motivate conservative voters this election year and that the financial meltdown is distracting some voters from the abortion issue. But he said a last-minute push by conservative Christians in 2004 was key to Bush’s re-election and predicted they could play the same role in 2008.

Kim Conger, a political scientist at Iowa State University, said a late push for evangelical voters did help Bush in 2004, “but it is a very different thing than getting people excited about John McCain,” even with Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin as his vice presidential pick.

Phil Burress, head of the Ohio-based Citizens for Community Values, said the dynamics were quite different in 2004, when conservative Christians spent some energy calling Democrat John Kerry a flip-flopper but were mostly motivated by enthusiasm for George W. Bush.

Now, there is less excitement about McCain than fear of an Obama presidency, Burress said.

“This reminds me of when I was a school kid, when I had to go out in the hall and bury my head in my hands because of the atom bomb,” he said.


They may have a sense of humor but I would have needed and change in clothing if I didn't die of a heart attack first...

Tree splits house in 2
Tree splits house in 2
Tree splits house in 2Tree splits house in 2
*Thanks, Daryn!

Jasper and the Unbaked Yeast Rolls

We have a fox terrier by the name of Jasper. He came to us in the summer of 2001 from the fox terrier rescue program. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this type of adoption, imagine taking in a 10 year old child about whom you know nothing and committing to doing your best to be a good parent.

Like a child, the dog came with his own idiosyncrasies. He will only sleep on the bed, on top of the covers, nuzzled as close to my face as he can get without actually performing French kisses on me.

Lest you think this is a bad case of 'no discipline,' I should tell you that Perry and I tried every means to break him of this habit including locking him in a separate bedroom for several nights. The new door cost over $200. But I digress.

Five weeks ago we began remodeling our house. Although the cost of the project is downright obnoxious, it was 20 years overdue AND it got me out of cooking Thanksgiving for family, extended family, and a lot of friends that I like more than family most of the time. I was assigned the task of preparing 124 of my famous yeast dinner rolls for the two Thanksgiving feasts we did attend.

I am still cursing the electrician for getting the new oven hooked up so quickly. It was the only appliance in the whole darn house that worked, thus the assignment.

I made the decision to cook the rolls on Wed evening to reheat Thurs am. Since the kitchen was freshly painted, you can imagine the odor. Not wanting the rolls to smell like Sherwin Williams #586, I put the rolls on baking sheets and set them in the living room to rise for a few hours Perry and I decided to go out to eat, returning in about an hour. The rolls were ready to go in the oven.

It was 8:30 PM. When I went to the living room to retrieve the pans, much to my shock one whole pan of 12 rolls was empty. I called out to Jasper and my worst nightmare became a reality. He literally wobbled over to me. He looked like a combination of the Pillsbury dough boy and the Michelin Tire man wrapped up in fur. He groaned when he walked. I swear even his cheeks were bloated.

I ran to the phone and called our vet. After a few seconds of uproarious laughter, he told me the dog would probably be OK, however, I needed to give him Pepto-Bismol every 2 hours for the rest of the night.

God only knows why I thought a dog would like Pepto-Bismol any more than my kids did when they were sick. Suffice it to say that by the time we went to bed the dog was black, white and pink. He was so bloated we had to lift him onto the bed for the night .

We arose at 7:30 and as we always do first thing; put the dog out to relieve himself. Well, the dog was as drunk as a sailor on his first leave. He was running into walls, falling flat on his butt and most of the time when he was walking his front half was going one direction and the other half was either dragging the grass or headed 90 degrees in another direction.

He couldn't lift his leg to pee, so he would just walk and pee at the same time. When he ran down the small incline in our back yard he couldn't stop himself and nearly ended up running into the fence.

His pupils were dilated and he was as dizzy as a loon. I endured another few seconds of laughter from the vet (second call within 12 hours) before he explained that the yeast had fermented in his belly and that he was indeed drunk.

He assured me that, not unlike most binges we humans go through, it would wear off after about 4 or 5 hours and to keep giving him Pepto Bismol.

Afraid to leave him by himself in the house, Perry and I loaded him up and took him with us to my sister's house for the first Thanksgiving meal of the day.

My sister lives outside of Muskogee on a ranch, (10 to 15 minute drive). Rolls firmly secured in the trunk(124 less 12) and drunk dog leaning from the back seat onto the console of the car between Perry and me, we took off. Now I know you probably don't believe that dogs burp, but believe me when I say that after eating a tray of risen unbaked yeast rolls, DOGS WILL BURP. These burps were pure Old Charter. They would have matched or beat any smell in a drunk tank at the police station. But that's not the worst of it.

Now he was beginning to fart and they smelled like baked rolls. God strike me dead if I am not telling the truth! We endured this for the entire trip to Karen's, thankful she didn't live any further away than she did.

Once Jasper was firmly placed in my sister's garage with the door locked, we finally sat down to enjoy our first Thanksgiving meal of the day. The dog was the topic of conversation all morning long and everyone made trips to the garage to witness my drunken dog, each returning with a tale of Jasper's latest endeavor to walk without running into something. Of course, as the old adage goes, 'what goes in must come out' and Jasper was no exception.

Granted if it had been me that had eaten 12 risen, unbaked yeast rolls, you might as well have put a concrete block up my behind, but alas a dog's digestive system is quite different from yours or mine. I discovered this was a mixed blessing when we prepared to leave Karen's house. Having discovered his 'packages' on the garage floor, we loaded him up in the car so we could hose down the floor.

This was another naive decision on our part. The blast of water from the hose hit the poop on the floor and the poop on the floor withstood the blast from the hose. It was like Portland cement beginning to set up and cure. We finally tried to remove it with a shovel. I (obviously no one else was going to offer their services) had to get on my hands and knees with a coarse brush to get the remnants off of the floor. And as if this wasn't degrading enough, the darn dog in his drunken state had walked through the poop and left paw prints all over the garage floor that had to be brushed too.

Well, by this time the dog was sobering up nicely so we took him home and dropped him off before we left for our second Thanksgiving dinner at Perry's sister's house.

I am happy to report that as of today (Monday) the dog is back to normal both in size and temperament. He has had a bath and is no longer tricolor. I am also happy to report that just this evening I found 2 risen unbaked yeast rolls hidden inside my closet door. It appears he must have come to his senses after eating 10 of them but decided hiding 2 of them for later would not be a bad idea. Now, I'm doing research on the computer as to how to clean unbaked dough from the carpet.

And how was *your* day?

Microsoft Ad Campaign Crashing Nation's Televisions


Users have reported a number of failures resulting from the defective commercials, ranging from inability to change channels to 'couldn't finish Heroes.'WASHINGTON—According to an FCC report released Monday, a new $300 million Microsoft ad campaign is responsible for causing televisions all across the country to unexpectedly crash.

The Microsoft ads, which began airing earlier this week, are being blamed for generating critical system errors in more than 70 million televisions.

In addition, thousands of frustrated Americans said that the ads have caused their TVs to become unresponsive, their screens to turn blue, and a small box with the message "terminal application error" to suddenly appear.

"I was in the middle of watching Monday Night Football when, all of a sudden, that stupid ad comes on and my TV freezes up," said Scottsdale, AZ resident Michael Chaplin, adding that he never wanted to see the commercial in the first place. "The next thing I know, all these numbers and symbols show up and I get an error message saying 'invalid file format' or something. Now my TV is ruined."

--more--


*The Onion

Monday, October 27, 2008

"DEAD ROCK STARS"


DW and I just finished an on-air interview on Rainbow Radio on 90.5 fm CFCR, with Saskatoon fiction writer Wes Funk. Following is an article published in Perceptions Magazine (October 22, 2008)



Saskatoon Author Wes Funk on the left, my partner Dwight is on the right
Saskatoon Author Wes Funk on the left, my partner Dwight is on the right

DEAD ROCK STARS
(Saskatoon) Saskatoon author Wes Funk has had his first queer-fiction novel published. Dead Rock Stars is based in Saskatchewan and explores queer life on the prairies.

The quirky Jackson Hill doesn't know it, but his routine, settled life in Saskatoon is about to go on a bumpy ride. When his father dies unexpectedly, he heads down the highway towards his hometown in southern Saskatchewan. He knows the funeral will be rough, but what he doesn't expect is to meet a handsome stranger along the way and to have a face-off with his brother and some dark issues of the past.

Besides being a humorous portrayal of Man's obsession with rock and roll, Dead Rock Stars is a stirring account of sibling rivalry, acts of forgiveness, and growing up gay on the Canadian prairies.

Funk says he loves the characters he writes about. He bases them on actual people who have touched his life. He finds the mixture of the serenity and vibrancy of growing up and living in Saskatchewan so fascinating he feels compelled to write about it.

Funk launched his book in Regina at the Book and Brier Patch on October 18 and will be at the new indigo bookstore Sunday November 2nd at 2 PM and will be at McNally Robinson in Saskatoon on November 3 at 7:30pm.

Click here for more info on the book signing at McNally-Robinson


4 proud men


Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room.

Those who remained talked about their kids.

T he first guy said, 'My son is my pride and joy He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel.

He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday.'

The second guy said, 'Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, and then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets He's so rich th at he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday'

The third man said: 'Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construct ion company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.'

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: 'What are all the congratulations for?'

One of the three said: 'We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. ..What about your son?'

The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'

The three friends said: 'What a shame... what a disappointment.'


The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done too badly either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends.'


*Thanks, Daryn

Guest Application For Jerry Springer Show


Personal Information:

Name________ ___ Nickname____ _________ _ CB Handle______

Yore Mama________ ______ Yore Daddy (if known)_____________

Spouse's Name________ _________

Relationship to spouse: __Sister __Brother__Mother_ _Father __Pet__Aunt __Uncle ___ Several of the above

Occupation: ___Unemployed Mechanic ___Gun Show Dealer___Skinhead

Number of Children in Household___ Number that are yours___

Circle Highest Level of Education: 1 2 3 4 How many times each grade_______

How Far is Your Mobile Home From a Paved Road: ___1mi. __5 mi. ___?

Number of Times You Have Survived a Tornado: ___

Number of Vehicles Owned___ Number on Cement Blocks___ Number Repossessed __

Truck Equipment: ___Gun Rack ___Spit Cup ___Fuzzy Dice ___Rebel Flag___Naked Woman Mudflaps ___NWO and/or NRA sticker

Weapons Owned: ___Tire Iron ___Pick Handle ___Beer Bottle ___Shotgun

Number of Dogs Owned: ___

Number of Homemade Tattoos:___

Which of the Following Appliances are in your Front Yard:
___Friggerator ___Heatin Stove ___Warsher ___TV ___Freezer

How Many of the Above Appliances Work: ___

Fav-o-rite Recreation: ___Drinkin ___Cow Chip Throwin ___Possum Huntin___Crawdad Huntin ___Scratchin ___Watchin Wrasslin

If You Can Read, Which Magazines Do You Prefer:
___Soap Opera Digest ___NWA ___Rifle and Shotgun ___NWA___TV Guide __National Enquirer ___True Confessions

Which Stinks Worse: ___Hogpen ___Outhouse ___Spouse

Can You Spell Your Last Name:___Yup ___Nope

Can You Remember Your Last Name: ___Yup ___Nope

Have You Ever Stayed Sober for More Than One Day: ___Yup ___Nope

Do You Know Any Words with More Than 4 Letters: ___Yup ___Nope

Which is Correct: ___"I Seed Him" or ___"I Seen Him"

How Many Cartons of Cigarettes Do You Smoke a Day? ___

Math Test: How Many Food Stamps Do the Following Cost?
___Six Pack ___Cigs ___Shotgun Shells ___Whore

Number of Times You've Seen: ___a UFO ___ Elvis___Elvis in a UFO

Health Questionaire: Which of the Following Do You Have?
___Head Lice ___B.O. ___Crabs ___Runny Nose___Boils

Can You Remember the Last Time You Bathed? ___Yup___Nope

Color of Teeth: ___Yellow ___Brown ___Black ___N/A

I hereby swear this is the trooth and sign my "X" on _________20_ _


*Thanks, Daryn

Looking for Work


A Japanese doctor said, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.'

A German doctor said, 'That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.'

A British doctor said, 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.'

A Texas doctor, not to be outdone said, 'You guys are way behind. We took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in the White House and now half the country is looking for work.


*Thanks, Daryn

Halloween Humour



Costumes

*Thanks, Daryn

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Sky Before Katrina Struck


One of my readers, Erwin did some snooping on snopes. seems that these pictures are not of Hurricane Katrina. Rather a hail storm in Mississippi - and another reader noticed that the 'tidal' wave is actually a a "storm surge" and comes when the tide is coming in and so is the storm. a tidal wave is any wave that comes with an incoming tide. that can be a huge surfing style wave to a ripple. notice, looking at the photo that the sea there is very rough. that isn't just one wave it's a series of waves in a surge.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/natural/storm.asp

Whoever took these pictures, did an awesome job.

Whoever said, 'awesome and terrifying' is telling the truth. Wow, take a look at this ...

These pictures were made by a man in Magee, MS where the eye of the storm passed thru

- what an experience-

Magee is 150 miles North of Waveland, Mississippiwhere the Hurricane made landfall.

The dance with Katrina, part of her beauty as she left destruction on her exit. They are remarkably dramatic.

Sky before Katrina

Sky before Katrina
Sky before Katrina

Sky before Katrina
Sky before Katrina
Sky before Katrina

The following picture was taken from the third story balcony of Saint Stanislaus College located next door to Our Lady of the Gulf church in Bay Saint Louis, Mississippi on the morning of August 29th, 2005. This is believed to be the initial tidal wave from Hurricane Katrina. The tidal wave was approximately 35 to 40 feet high. When it slammed into the beach front communities of Bay Saint Louis and Waveland Mississippi to completely destroy 99% of every structure along the beach for 9 miles and over a mile inland. The destruction only started there. The flooding that continued inland destroyed the contents of all but 35 homes in these two communities of approximately 14,000 people.

This picture was taken from the third story balcony of Saint Stanislaus College located next door to Our Lady of the Gulf church in Bay Saint Louis, Mississippi on the morning of August 29th, 2005. This is believed to be the initial tidal wave from Hurricane Katrina. The tidal wave was approximately 35 to 40 feet high. When it slammed into the beach front communities of Bay Saint Louis and Waveland Mississippi to completely destroy 99% of every structure along the beach for 9 miles and over a mile inland. The destruction only started there. The flooding that continued inland destroyed the contents of all but 35 homes in these two communities of approximately 14,000 people


*Thanks, Marion

FYI


One of the few animals NOT hunted for it's skin - The 'Pubic' -hare!
*Thanks, Karen

TRUE or FALSE? YOU DECIDE!



There are 60 Checkers on a checkerboard game.





Nope. 30. Each player gets 15.


Checkers on board






Dressing in strange or inappropriate clothing is called cisvestism.




Yup. Dressing in strange or inappropriate clothing—such as an adult’s wearing clothes intended for a child. Or this....

Cisvestism




The B. F. represent in tire maker B. F. Goodrich’s name stands for Brent Frederick.





Aye, That's the rub! Not true! It's Benjamin Franklin. Dr. Benjamin Franklin Goodrich established the first rubber company west of the Alleghenies in Akron, Ohio, in 1870.


BF Goodrich Radial T/A





Sheep kept on the White House lawn during World War I to free the gardeners for military service.







You bet! The sheep of state—which at one point numbered 18—not only grazed and kept the lawn well manicured, but their wool was auctioned off to raise money for the Red Cross.


Sheep on White House lawn