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Thursday, August 05, 2021

Theme Songs Every Gay Man Should Know

 Gay Banter



Gay men and classic TV show theme songs go hand in hand. Shows dating back decades still have a special place in our hearts and on the video screen of most gay show bars. Here's a tribute to the 50 classic television show theme songs every gay man should know:

The Golden Girls

Wonder Woman

Laverne & Shirley

Six Feet Under

The Patty Duke Show

Who's The Boss

Sex and the City

227

The Oprah Winfrey Show

The Monkees

Batman

Cheers

Dallas

Diff'rent Strokes

Dynasty

Gilligan's Island

Hawaii Five-O

Good Times

The Jetsons

Spongebob Squarepants

The Beverly Hillbillies

Friends

The Munsters

Murphy Brown

Moonlighting

The Jeffersons

The Greatest American Hero

The Brady Bunch

The Partridge Family

The Mary Tyler Moore Show

What's Happening!!

Webster

The Simpsons

Amen

Ally McBeal

The Bionic Woman

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Cagney & Lacey

Charlie's Angels

ChiPs

Desperate Housewives

The Ellen Show

The Facts of Life
 
Fantasy Island

Will & Grace

I Love Lucy

Rawhide

Roseanne

Sanford and Son

Seinfeld

Good Times

The Jetsons

Spongebob Squarepants

The Beverly Hillbillies

Friends

The Munsters

Murphy Brown

Moonlighting

The Jeffersons

The Greatest American Hero

The Brady Bunch

The Partridge Family

The Mary Tyler Moore Show

What's Happening!!

Webster

The Simpsons

Amen

Ally McBeal

The Bionic Woman

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Cagney & Lacey

Charlie's Angels

ChiPs

Desperate Housewives

The Ellen Show

The Facts of Life

Fantasy Island

Will & Grace

I Love Lucy

Rawhide

Roseanne

Sanford and Son

Seinfeld

Elephant's Memory - Touching Story

 


Elephants and a man

In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from college.  On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.


The elephant seemed distressed so Mbembe approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot, and found a large thorn deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Mbembe worked the thorn out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather stern look on its face, stared at him. For several tense moments Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away.


Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day. Twenty years later he was walking through a zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe and lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.


Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. Suddenly the elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe's legs and swung him wildly back and forth along the railing, killing him.



Probably wasn't the same elephant.

Jesus Was...

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 

1. He called everyone brother. 

2. He liked Gospel. 

3. He couldn't get a fair trial. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 

1. He went into His Father's business. 

2. He lived at home until he was 33. 

3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian: 

1. He talked with His hands. 

2. He had wine with His meals. 

3. He used olive oil. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian: 

1. He never cut His hair. 

2. He walked around barefoot all the time. 

3. He started a new religion. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a member of The First Nations: 

1. He was at peace with nature. 

2. He ate a lot of fish. 

3. He talked about the Great Spirit. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments the Jesus was Irish: 

1. He never got married. 

2. He was always telling stories. 

3. He loved green pastures. 

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a WOMAN: 

1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food. 

2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it. 

3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was work to do.

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count, August 5, 2021

Wednesday, August 04, 2021

Aesop's Fables

The Wolf and the Lamb 

Wolf, meeting with a Lamb astray from the fold, resolved not to lay violent hands on him, but to find some plea to justify to the Lamb the Wolf's right to eat him. He thus addressed him: "Sirrah, last year you grossly insulted me." "Indeed," bleated the Lamb in a mournful tone of voice, "I was not then born." Then said the Wolf, "You feed in my pasture." "No, good sir," replied the Lamb, "I have not yet tasted grass." Again said the Wolf, "You drink of my well." "No," exclaimed the Lamb, "I never yet drank water, for as yet my mother's milk is both food and drink to me." Upon which the Wolf seized him and ate him up, saying, "Well! I won't remain supper-less, even though you refute every one of my imputations." The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny. 


The Bat and the Weasels 

A Bat who fell upon the ground and was caught by a Weasel pleaded to be spared his life. The Weasel refused, saying that he was by nature the enemy of all birds. The Bat assured him that he was not a bird, but a mouse, and thus was set free. Shortly afterwards the Bat again fell to the ground and was caught by another Weasel, whom he likewise entreated not to eat him. The Weasel said that he had a special hostility to mice. The Bat assured him that he was not a mouse, but a bat, and thus a second time escaped. 

It is wise to turn circumstances to good account. 


The Ass and the Grasshopper 

An Ass having heard some Grasshoppers chirping, was highly enchanted; and, desiring to possess the same charms of melody, demanded what sort of food they lived on to give them such beautiful voices. They replied, "The dew." The Ass resolved that he would live only upon dew, and in a short time died of hunger. 


The Lion and the Mouse 

A Lion was awakened from sleep by a Mouse running over his face. Rising up angrily, he caught him and was about to kill him, when the Mouse piteously entreated, saying: "If you would only spare my life, I would be sure to repay your kindness." The Lion laughed and let him go. It happened shortly after this that the Lion was caught by some hunters, who bound him by tying him to some ropes to the ground. The Mouse, recognizing his roar, came gnawed the rope with his teeth, and set him free, exclaim 

"You ridiculed the idea of my ever being able to help you, expecting to receive from me any repayment of your favor; I now you know that it is possible for even a Mouse to con benefits on a Lion." 

The Early Risers Now Are Blest

The early risers now are blest

When morning´s rays creep toward the west.

For early is the only hour

That one may toil with all one´s pow´r.


By midday Sunna´s heat will scorch,

So strongly now doth burn her torch.

All afternoon the red will climb;

We´ll wistf´ly dream of winter´s rime.


No warning giv´n, the sun doth hide.

What woe does this black cloud betide?

No woe - ´tis mighty Asa-Thor.

His wain approaches with a roar.


The wind strips leaves from all the trees-

This is no gentle summer breeze.

Blue-tinged bolts flash; great raindrops fall;

The summer storm refreshes all.


The clouds have fled; the sun sinks low.

Where did today´s long hours go?

As insects sing the land to sleep

Our dream to hidden worlds may leap.


© Analemma McKee-Schwenke 

This document may be freely distributed and copied for non-commercial purposes

provided it is copied in its entirety, including copyright notice and this statement.

Giggles, Guffaws, and Groaners

I renewed my car insurance over the phone today, and as I was about to hang up the woman on the other end asked if I had a pet.

I said, "Yes, I've got a dog."

She asked, "Would you like to insure him too?"

I said, "No thanks, he can't drive!" 


HYUK!

I told my cat that I'm going to teach him to speak English.

He looked at me and said, "Me, how?"

HYUK!

Customer: Waiter, I'm in a hurry! Will the pancakes be long?

Waiter: No sir, round. 

HYUK!

IPappy sees Little Johnny walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya going boy?"

The Johnny smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting Peggy-Sue."

The Father said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern."

"Sure Pa, I know," Johnny said, "and look what you got!" 

HYUK!

Your dog's barking at the back door. Your spouse's barking at the front. Who do you let in?

Well, it's your call, but the dog'll stop barking when you let him in.

HYUK!

My dentist was voted "Dentist Of The Year"....

He didn't get a trophy, they just gave him a little plaque. 

HYUK!

"Why did you choose to be cremated?"

"Being cremated is my last chance to have a smoking hot body!" 

HYUK!

Why was the seafood restaurant being investigated by the IRS?

They were suspected of being a shell company in some fishy business. 

HYUK!

A man who hadn't attended church in years suddenly began attending faithfully on Sunday mornings instead of going fishing as was his normal habit.

The pastor was highly gratified and at the end of service one morning told him, "How wonderful it makes me feel to see you at services with your good wife!"

"Well, Preacher," said the fisherman, "Quite honestly, it's a matter of choice. I'd much rather hear your sermon than hers." 

HYUK!

She was in the kitchen doing the boiled eggs for breakfast.

He walks in and she says, "You've got to make love to me this very moment!"

He says, "What's going on?"

She says, "The egg timer is broken." 


clapping

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count
Tokyo Olympics Medal Count August 4,2021

Monday, August 02, 2021

Be Kind

 

Be kind!

Carol the chicken

Carol the chicken
Carol the chicken

Carol the chicken

Carol the chicken

Carol the chicken

Carol the chicken

Chicken and a faucet

Science and Covid 19

 

Science and Covid 19

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Standings
Tokyo Olympics Medal Standings Aug 2, 2021
Based on population - and the ability to pick the cream of the crop would account for China  and the US to be in first place - simply more and better athletes to choose from. Those countries with smaller populations the medal to population ratio is actually higher. Just my opinion.

Sunday, August 01, 2021

Windows 11 update...

 

Windows 11

New Windows error codes released for upcomimg Windows 11


Winerr 000 - Unexpected Intelligent User Detected; Please Reload Everything

Winerr 001 - Intimidation Failed; Attempting to Crash Repeatedly

Winerr 002 - Erroneous Error; No Error Occurred (Yet)

Winerr 003 - RAM Depleted; Annex China (Y/N)?

Winerr 004 - Deluxe Error Required. Please Send $75 to Upgrade Your Error

Winerr 005 - Long File Name Error; Disk Erased to Make Room for Filename

Winerr 006 - Insufficient RAM to Crash Properly; Attempting Fake Crash

Winerr 007 - Alphanumeric Sequence "iMAC" Prohibited

Winerr 008 - This License Has Expired; Please Purchase Another Copy

Winerr 009 - Error Buffer Overflow; Too Many Errors

Winerr 00A - Non-Microsoft Application Encountered, Not Our Fault. Really.

Winerr 00B - Push Error; Removing Files to Make Room for Advertisement

Winerr 00C - Windows Loaded Correctly This Time, That's 1.

Winerr 00D - User Error; Lemming Not Found

Winerr 00E - Open Standard Encountered; Attempting to Redmondize

Winerr 00F - Reserved for Future Coding Errors

Winerr 010 - Virus Error - Other Applications Will Be Closed Instead

Winerr 011 - Orwell Not Found; You Must Use Microsoft Edge

Winerr 012 - Cash Underflow - Credit Card Number Will Be Assimilated

Winerr 013 - Keyboard Error; User Must Learn to Slow Down

Winerr 014 - User Error; Reading License Agreement Mandatory to Continue

Winerr 015 - Error Message Deleted

Winerr 016 - Expected Error Did Not Occur; Attempting to Restart Error Sequence

Winerr 017 - Multitasking Attempted; System Confused

Winerr 018 - Network Error - Your Crash Will Be Replicated to All Stations

Winerr 019 - Freedom-of-Choice Error; Select a Microsoft Browser To Continue

Winerr 01A - Insult Detected -- Your Bill Gates Joke Will Be Deleted

Winerr 01B - Error Removing Temp File; a Permanent File Will Be Substituted

Winerr 01C - Wrong Disk Formatted. Sorry About That.

Winerr 01D - Mandatory Error Inserted to Meet Error Quota

Winerr 01E - Please Insert Your Favorite Error Here

Winerr 01F - Error In Progress; Please Wait....

Winerr 020 - Unknown Error Occurred But Was Lost. Windows Will Try To Remember

Winerr 021 - Error Parsing Error List; Please Wait For Next Error

Winerr 022 - Upgrade Error; Please Format Your Drive And Reload Everything

Winerr 042 - Error Explaining Meaning Of Life. Sorry You Have To Buy The Book.

Winerr 666 - TRUMP Virus Found. Hit Enter For Global Thermonuclear War

Seriously, Switch to Ubuntu. You won't be disappointed!

Rob Peter to pay Paul

 

Saints Peter and Paul  
The expression was well enough established in English for it to have been considered proverbial by John Heywood when he published A Dialogue conteinyng the nomber in effect of all the Prouerbes in the Englishe tongue in 1546:
    Rob Peter and pay Paul: thou sayest I do;
    But thou robbest and poulst Peter and Paul too

The phrase was also in use in other European countries and was known in France by at least 1611, when Cotgrave produced A Dictionarie of the French and English Tongues:

    Découvrir Saint Pierre pour couvrir Saint Paul [Strip Peter to clothe Paul]

Rob Peter to pay Paul. The precise date is not the only aspect of this phrase that is somewhat uncertain. Scholars also disagree as to the thinking of whoever coined it. Given that any two names would work in a 'rob X to pay Y' proverb, why choose Peter and Paul? It has been suggested that the primary reason for Peter and Paul is the alliteration, that is, the same reason that Jack was paired with Jill when they went up the hill. That may well be part of the story, but there's surely more to it. The similarities between Saint Peter and Saint Paul go deeper than their sharing of the letter P.

The expression was coined at a time when almost all English people were Christian and they would have been well used to hearing Peter and Paul paired together. They were both apostles of Christ, both martyred in Rome and shared the Feast Day on 29th June. This commemoration now passes by with little mention, but not so in medieval England. The essence of the meaning of 'rob Peter to pay Paul' is the pointlessness of taking from one only to give to another who was similar. There are many churches of Saint Peter and Saint Paul in England and throughout Europe. It may not be the case that, as Peter Heylyn asserted, that the phrase arose from the borrowing of money from one church to fund another, but from the familiarity of the notion of Peter and Paul being alike and inseparable.

A most wonderful Lammas - Blessed Be!

Happy Lammas

Lammas is observed on August 1st. In some English-speaking countries in the Northern Hemisphere, August 1 is Lammas Day (Anglo-Saxon hlaf-mas, "loaf-mass"), the festival of the wheat harvest, and is the first harvest festival of the year. On this day it was customary to bring to church a loaf made from the new crop, which began to be harvested at Lammastide. The loaf was blessed, and in Anglo-Saxon England it might be employed afterwards to work magic: A book of Anglo-Saxon charms directed that the lammas bread be broken into four bits, which were to be placed at the four corners of the barn, to protect the garnered grain. In many parts of England, tenants were bound to present freshly harvested wheat to their landlords on or before the first day of August. In the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle, where it is referred to regularly, it is called "the feast of first fruits". The blessing of first fruits was performed annually in both the Eastern and Western Churches on the first or the sixth of August. Lammas coincides with the feast of St. Peter in Chains, commemorating St. Peter's miraculous deliverance from prison. (With material from: Wikipedia)
Lammas

This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?


Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%


So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

DO YOU KNOW ANY PEOPLE LIKE THESE?????

Saturday, July 31, 2021

Wacky Headlines

Wacky Headlines
Click Above

P.S.


animated pencil

Dear Husband,

I'm writing this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.

I've been a good woman for seven years and I have nothing to show forit. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.

You came home and ate in two minutes and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me that you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything.

Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore, what ever the case is, I'm gone.



Your EX-Wife

P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!


animated pencil

Dear Ex-Wife:

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry away from what you've been.

I watch sports so much trying to drown out your Constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work.

I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week; the first thing that came to mind was, "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.

When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I went to sleep when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99.

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed,

Rich As Hell and Free!
Your Ex-Husband

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this........ but Carl, my brother, was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

Best of The Love Doctor

 The Love Doctor Dear Love Doctor,


Is it unreasonable to expect my partner to remember my birthday? We've been together almost five years, and every year he misses it.

He really is very sweet, but he can never remember dates. He says he doesn't mean to, but he can't can't keep it straight.

Birthdays are important to me. For his, I planned a big night and scrimped and saved to buy him new golf equipment.

But, when mine rolls around, nothing!

Last week, I thought I had left enough hints that the big day was coming, but he didn't pick up on it.

Now, he's off on a business trip, and I'm sitting alone and my birthday.

Even a card would have been nice.

What can I do to keep him on track.

Signed,

Disappointed

Dear Disappointed,

Oh, my you are down aren't you? Well, some men just don't remember birthdays and anniversaries. I'm sure he was upset when he discovered he had missed it.

Now, then, it is time to start planning for next year. For his birthday, get him a palm or daytimer, and be sure you fill in the important dates, like, your birthday, Christmas, anniversary.

Get him into the practice of using it right from the start.

Second, whenever he misses a date, make a federal case out of it. Sometimes a little drama is needed. Have a hissy fit. Give him the silent treatment. Make it a big enough show that he won't forget ever again.

I love my birthdays too, and I'd get terribly upset if the day were missed by some uncaring clod. So remember: Men have to be trained just like a puppy. And, sometimes, you need tough love.

The Love Doctor

--Send your questions about love to "The Love Doctor" directly from 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow! I have added an email link that goes direct to The Love Doctor - this will enable quicker responses from him. You can do this by clicking on his picture in the sidebar and put your question in the email. This will ensure that The Love Doctor gets your question. The Love Doctor forwards his replies to me for posting consideration. Note: Due to the high volume of letters that The Love Doctor receives, not all letters will be posted on 'OZ' - but the Love Doctor will reply to every email. (so he says)

The Tip Of The Day

Do you know the “no-zone”? 

animated carrot truck The no-zone is the area near a semi-truck’s side and rear where cars seem to disappear into blind spots. Vehicles lingering in the “no-zone” can’t be seen by truck drivers, causing a potential hazard if a lane change becomes necessary. 

Tailgating in the rear “no-zone” not only hides you from the truck driver, but also radically reduces your view of traffic ahead. Also when passing, avoid cutting in front of a truck too soon, then abruptly slowing down. 

Because it takes longer to pass large trucks, maintain your speed and wait until the front of the truck is visible in your side rearview mirror before shifting back into the other lane.

no zone


Friday, July 30, 2021

R. - B.I.O.N.!

 

Ripley's

Mouth-shaped urinal sparks complaints

Pissoire** A Dutch McDonald's has been forced to remove a pair of mouth-shaped urinals after a tourist complained.


The branch in the south east of the Netherlands said it was removing the bright red, mouth-shaped urinals after a disgusted US customer complained to McDonald's head office in America.

Manager of the fast-food outlet Giel Pijper said the urinals, named Kisses, were works of art which he was now going to have to sell off.

The mouth-shaped urinals, designed by Utrecht-based firm Bathroom Mania!, have already caused controversy.

Virgin Airways was forced to scrap plans in 2004 to install two of the Kisses at New York's John F Kennedy airport after complaints they looked like women's mouths.

But designer Meike van Schijndel has denied they were ever conceived as anything rude and said they were designed as a fun cartoon mouth and not as a woman's mouth.

*Ananova
**This is not an actual urinal... I could only find a painting of one... but you get the idea....

Just ask for the 'SASK CUT'

 

hillbilly overalls
Yes, the new one is out! Brand new edition of...

"You know you're from Saskatchewan when......"

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-room's so clean.

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighbourhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.

Thursday, July 29, 2021

I'll take "Quotable Quotes" for $1000, Alex

quote

"Knowledge is Power."

-- Francis Bacon


"If you think education is expensive, try ignorance."

-- Derek Bok, attributed


"It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data."

-- Arthur Conan Doyle, (Sherlock Holmes, Scandal in Bohemia, 1891)


"If I have seen further,… it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants."

-- Isaac Newton, letter to Robert Hooke, February 5, 1675/76


"Most of the fundamental ideas of science are essentially simple, and may, as a rule, be expressed in a language comprehensible to everyone."

-- Albert Einstein, The Evolution of Physics


"It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer."

-- Albert Einstein


"The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking."

-- Albert Einstein, Out of My Later Years


"If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?"

-- Albert Einstein


"Whoever undertakes to set himself up as judge in the field of truth and knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the Gods."

-- Albert Einstein


"The only source of knowledge is experience."

-- Albert Einstein


"Creating a new theory is not like destroying an old barn and erecting a skyscraper in its place. It is rather like climbing a mountain, gaining new and wider views, discovering unexpected connections between our starting points and its rich environment. But the point from which we started out still exists and can be seen, although it appears smaller and forms a tiny part of our broad view gained by the mastery of the obstacles on our adventurous way up."

-- Albert Einstein, The Evolution of Physics.


"Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age 18."

-- Albert Einstein


"Things should be made as simple as possible, but not any simpler."

-- Albert Einstein


"We shall require a substantially new manner of thinking if mankind is to survive."

-- Albert Einstein


"Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects."

-- Will Rogers


"The greater our knowledge increases, the greater our ignorance unfolds."

-- John Fitzgerald Kennedy


"The great tragedy of science -- the slaying of a beautiful theory by an ugly fact."

-- T.H. Huxley, Evidence as to Man's Place in Nature.


"An important scientific innovation rarely makes its way by gradually winning over and converting its opponents… What does happen is that its opponents gradually die out, and that the growing generation is familiarized with the ideas from the beginning."

-- Max Planck


"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts."

-- Bertrand Russell


A LIBERAL DECALOGUE By Bertrand Russell

"Perhaps the essence of the Liberal outlook could be summed up in a new decalogue, not intended to replace the old one but only to supplement it. The Ten Commandments that, as a teacher, I should wish to promulgate, might be set forth as follows:

1. Do not feel absolutely certain of anything.

2. Do not think it worth while to proceed by concealing evidence, for the evidence is sure to come to light.

3. Never try to discourage thinking for you are sure to succeed. 

4. When you meet with opposition, even if it should be from your husband or your children, endeavor to overcome it by argument and not by authority, for a victory dependent upon authority is unreal and illusory.

5. Have no respect for the authority of others, for there are always contrary authorities to be found.

6. Do not use power to suppress opinions you think pernicious, for if you do the opinions will suppress you.

7. Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.

8. Find more pleasure in intelligent dissent that in passive agreement, for, if you value intelligence as you should, the former implies a deeper agreement than the latter.

9. Be scrupulously truthful, even if the truth is inconvenient, for it is more inconvenient when you try to conceal it.

10. Do not feel envious of the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise, for only a fool will think that it is happiness."

-- The Autobiography of Bertrand Russell, 1944-1969, pp. 71-2


A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling

by Mark Twain


For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and Iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all. Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli. Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.


And from the other side...


"The youthful brain should in general not be burdened with things ninety-five percent of which it cannot use and hence forgets again… In many cases, the material to be learned in the various subjects is so swollen that only a fraction of it remains in the head of the individual pupil, and only a fraction of this abundance can find application, while on the other hand it is not adequate for the man working and earning his living in a definite field."

-- Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, p. 418.


"Knowledge above the average can be crammed into the average man, but it remains dead, and in the last analysis sterile knowledge. The result is a man who may be a living dictionary but nevertheless falls down miserably in all special situations and decisive moments in life."

-- Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, p. 429.


"The folkish state must not adjust its entire educational work primarily to the inoculation of mere knowledge, but to the breeding of absolutely healthy bodies. The training of mental abilities is only secondary. And here again, first place must be taken by the development of character, especially the promotion of will-power and determination, combined with the training of joy in responsibility, and only in last place comes scientific schooling."

-- Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, p. 408.


"A people of scholars, if they are physically degenerate, weak-willed and cowardly pacifists, will not storm the heavens, indeed, they will not be able to safeguard their existence on this earth."

-- Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, p. 408.


"But it would be absolutely mistaken to regard a wealth of theoretical knowledge as characteristic proof for the qualities and abilities of a leader."

-- Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, p. 580. 

Eye Witless

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.


Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man.

He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.

Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.

"Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks.

They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his.


She listens.

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.

The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed!! Everything had been SO incredible!!!!

"You know, " he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"

"No, " she replies. . . . . "You just happened to catch my eye."

animated eye

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count

Male or Female???

To find the Answer, look down!

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NOT HERE…DUMMY !!