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Friday, August 06, 2010

Giggles, Gaffaws and Groaners...


A woman who had thrown a dinner party, at which raw oysters, curried lamb, and steamed mussels were all served, met her physician on the street the following day. “I’m sorry you weren’t able to come to my party last night,” she said. “You are so busy these days, and I think it would have done you some good to have been there.”

“Your party has done me good,” he said. “I’ve just seen five of your dinner guests.”



The young son of a family of three balloons was sufficiently small for him to sleep with his parents in their bed. The time came when he became too big to fit in the bed and his father told him to sleep in another bedroom. During the night the son was afraid and went back to his parents but could not fit. He undid the knot in his father balloon to make him smaller and thus create some space and then re-knotted it. This did not work and he did the same to the mother balloon, still no joy, so he did the same to himself and eventually managed to snuggle in. The next day the father saw his son and very angry he said, “Son you’ve let me down, your mother down and worst of all you've let yourself down.”

HYUK!

A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter retuned alone, staggering under an eight-point buck. “Where is Mike?” asked another hunter. “He fainted a couple of miles up the trail,” Mike’s partner answered. “You left him lying there alone and carried the deer back?” “A tough call,” said the hunter. “But I figured no one is going to steal Mike.”



The poet had been droning on at the party about his various sources of inspiration. “Yes, he told the young girl. “I’m at present collecting some of my better poems to be published posthumously.” “Lovely,” said the girl. “I’ll look forward to it.”

HYUK!

Two strands of DNA were walking down the street. One says to the other, "Do these genes make me look fat?


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