SLOW DANCE

 

Have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?

Or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You'd better slow down - don't dance so fast.

Time is short - the music won't last.

Do you run through each day- -on the fly?

When you ask “How are you?” - do you hear the reply?

When the day is done - do you lie in your bed?

With the next hundred chores - running through your head?

You'd better slow down - don't dance so fast.

Time is short - the music won't last.

Ever told your child - We'll do it tomorrow?

And in your haste - Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch let a good friendship die

Cause you never had time to call and say,"Hi"

You'd better slow down - don't dance so fast.

Time is short - the music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere

You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day,

It is like an unopened gift....thrown away.

Life is not a race, do take it slower

Hear the music - before the song is over.
by David L. Weatherford

Tokyo 2021 Olympic Medal Count

 

R.I.P Dennis ‘Dee Tee’ Thomas (1951 - 2021)

Musician Dennis “Dee Tee” Thomas, a founding member of “Get Down On It” and “Celebration” group Kool & the Gang, has died at the age of 70. An official statement posted to the soul and funk group’s Facebook page announced on August 7 that he “passed away peacefully in his sleep” in New Jersey. No cause was given. 

Thomas founded Kool & the Gang in 1964 along with brothers Robert “Kool” and Ronald “Khalis” Bell, as well as Robert “Spike” Mickens, Charles Smith, George Brown, and Ricky West.

Employee of the Month

 ANYONE YOU KNOW???

Giving clothes to goodwill.

It should make you feel all warm inside knowing that the clothes you previously wore are now gracing another grateful body.

Remember that cleaning out your closets at least once a year and giving former "treasures" to goodwill is a great way to give back to your community, and help those who are less fortunate. Many people only think of doing this when the weather gets cold, and pass along the sweaters and coats they haven't worn for awhile. But, there's a tremendous need for summer weather attire as well.

So look through your closets and see if you don't have something that doesn't fit, or might be a little out of fashion. Those things will probably fit someone else, and could be the height of fashion for them.

With that in mind, I send along this heart-warming photo to inspire you, and remind you that your efforts won't go unnoticed.

Click here.

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Standings

 

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Standings, Aug 7

So long Bill Gates - "A look back"

A celebration of Bill Gates contributions to the computer industry.

Click Above To Watch The Presentation.

Woman Finds Jesus In MRI Image

 

(CBS) PITTSBURGH A Pittsburgh woman believes she has found Jesus. Not at a church, but in an MRI of her back.

Rhonda Hodge, of Duquesne, works for a neurologist at Allegheny General Hospital but she doesn't know how to explain the bizarre image that appeared in medical images.

She's had a number of x-rays taken of her spine because of a bulged disc that has caused numbness in her neck and left arm.

But there's one picture that especially caught her attention, and that of her friends and co-workers.

Hodge believes one image from an MRI shows a miraculous vision of Jesus, showing the Crucifixion.

"You can almost seen the thorns around the head and the nails... the nails through the feet," she said.

Hodge doesn't know what to do next, but some of her friends have been offering some suggestions.

"They've been trying to get me to sell the pictures on eBay," said Hodge. "It's been quite a few months, I haven't done it yet. I don't know. You could actually see the hands. They look like they're nailed on the cross. You can see the body. It's in a straight line, and then you see his feet. They look like they're together, and the knees are bent."

Hodge said there's no doubt in her mind that the x-ray does, indeed, look like the Crucifixion. 

But has it changed her life?

"I think I believe as much as I need to," said Hodge. "I can't be swayed by a picture. My neck does feel better. I don't know if that was Jesus or physical therapy."

Riddle Me This!

You can see nothing else 

When you look in my face, 

I will look you in the eye

And I will never lie.

What am I?

Click above for the answer.

Interesting Statistics on 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow

 

Swedish visitors has had a marked increase ever since I started displaying the Tokyo Olympics Medal Counts. There was barely any Swedes before that. Cool! In last few days has even overtaken the United States!

'MAN OF THE HOUSE'

The husband had just finished reading the book, 'MAN OF THE HOUSE'. 

He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife. 

Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you are going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?" 

His wife replied, "The f**king funeral director would be my guess."

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count, August 6, 2021

Theme Songs Every Gay Man Should Know

 

Gay men and classic TV show theme songs go hand in hand. Shows dating back decades still have a special place in our hearts and on the video screen of most gay show bars. Here's a tribute to the 50 classic television show theme songs every gay man should know:

The Golden Girls

Wonder Woman

Laverne & Shirley

Six Feet Under

The Patty Duke Show

Who's The Boss

Sex and the City

227

The Oprah Winfrey Show

The Monkees

Batman

Cheers

Dallas

Diff'rent Strokes

Dynasty

Gilligan's Island

Hawaii Five-O

Good Times

The Jetsons

Spongebob Squarepants

The Beverly Hillbillies

Friends

The Munsters

Murphy Brown

Moonlighting

The Jeffersons

The Greatest American Hero

The Brady Bunch

The Partridge Family

The Mary Tyler Moore Show

What's Happening!!

Webster

The Simpsons

Amen

Ally McBeal

The Bionic Woman

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Cagney & Lacey

Charlie's Angels

ChiPs

Desperate Housewives

The Ellen Show

The Facts of Life

 

Fantasy Island

Will & Grace

I Love Lucy

Rawhide

Roseanne

Sanford and Son

Seinfeld

Good Times

The Jetsons

Spongebob Squarepants

The Beverly Hillbillies

Friends

The Munsters

Murphy Brown

Moonlighting

The Jeffersons

The Greatest American Hero

The Brady Bunch

The Partridge Family

The Mary Tyler Moore Show

What's Happening!!

Webster

The Simpsons

Amen

Ally McBeal

The Bionic Woman

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Cagney & Lacey

Charlie's Angels

ChiPs

Desperate Housewives

The Ellen Show

The Facts of Life

Fantasy Island

Will & Grace

I Love Lucy

Rawhide

Roseanne

Sanford and Son

Seinfeld

Elephant's Memory - Touching Story

 

In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from college.  On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

The elephant seemed distressed so Mbembe approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot, and found a large thorn deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Mbembe worked the thorn out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather stern look on its face, stared at him. For several tense moments Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away.

Mbembe never forgot that elephant or the events of that day. Twenty years later he was walking through a zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe and lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mbembe couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. Suddenly the elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe's legs and swung him wildly back and forth along the railing, killing him.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

Jesus Was...

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 

1. He called everyone brother. 

2. He liked Gospel. 

3. He couldn't get a fair trial. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 

1. He went into His Father's business. 

2. He lived at home until he was 33. 

3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian: 

1. He talked with His hands. 

2. He had wine with His meals. 

3. He used olive oil. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian: 

1. He never cut His hair. 

2. He walked around barefoot all the time. 

3. He started a new religion. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a member of The First Nations: 

1. He was at peace with nature. 

2. He ate a lot of fish. 

3. He talked about the Great Spirit. 

But then there were 3 equally good arguments the Jesus was Irish: 

1. He never got married. 

2. He was always telling stories. 

3. He loved green pastures. 

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a WOMAN: 

1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food. 

2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it. 

3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was work to do.

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count, August 5, 2021

Aesop's Fables

The Wolf and the Lamb 

Wolf, meeting with a Lamb astray from the fold, resolved not to lay violent hands on him, but to find some plea to justify to the Lamb the Wolf's right to eat him. He thus addressed him: "Sirrah, last year you grossly insulted me." "Indeed," bleated the Lamb in a mournful tone of voice, "I was not then born." Then said the Wolf, "You feed in my pasture." "No, good sir," replied the Lamb, "I have not yet tasted grass." Again said the Wolf, "You drink of my well." "No," exclaimed the Lamb, "I never yet drank water, for as yet my mother's milk is both food and drink to me." Upon which the Wolf seized him and ate him up, saying, "Well! I won't remain supper-less, even though you refute every one of my imputations." The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny. 

The Bat and the Weasels 

A Bat who fell upon the ground and was caught by a Weasel pleaded to be spared his life. The Weasel refused, saying that he was by nature the enemy of all birds. The Bat assured him that he was not a bird, but a mouse, and thus was set free. Shortly afterwards the Bat again fell to the ground and was caught by another Weasel, whom he likewise entreated not to eat him. The Weasel said that he had a special hostility to mice. The Bat assured him that he was not a mouse, but a bat, and thus a second time escaped. 

It is wise to turn circumstances to good account. 

The Ass and the Grasshopper 

An Ass having heard some Grasshoppers chirping, was highly enchanted; and, desiring to possess the same charms of melody, demanded what sort of food they lived on to give them such beautiful voices. They replied, "The dew." The Ass resolved that he would live only upon dew, and in a short time died of hunger. 

The Lion and the Mouse 

A Lion was awakened from sleep by a Mouse running over his face. Rising up angrily, he caught him and was about to kill him, when the Mouse piteously entreated, saying: "If you would only spare my life, I would be sure to repay your kindness." The Lion laughed and let him go. It happened shortly after this that the Lion was caught by some hunters, who bound him by tying him to some ropes to the ground. The Mouse, recognizing his roar, came gnawed the rope with his teeth, and set him free, exclaim 

"You ridiculed the idea of my ever being able to help you, expecting to receive from me any repayment of your favor; I now you know that it is possible for even a Mouse to con benefits on a Lion." 

The Early Risers Now Are Blest

The early risers now are blest

When morning´s rays creep toward the west.

For early is the only hour

That one may toil with all one´s pow´r.

By midday Sunna´s heat will scorch,

So strongly now doth burn her torch.

All afternoon the red will climb;

We´ll wistf´ly dream of winter´s rime.

No warning giv´n, the sun doth hide.

What woe does this black cloud betide?

No woe - ´tis mighty Asa-Thor.

His wain approaches with a roar.

The wind strips leaves from all the trees-

This is no gentle summer breeze.

Blue-tinged bolts flash; great raindrops fall;

The summer storm refreshes all.

The clouds have fled; the sun sinks low.

Where did today´s long hours go?

As insects sing the land to sleep

Our dream to hidden worlds may leap.

© Analemma McKee-Schwenke 

This document may be freely distributed and copied for non-commercial purposes

provided it is copied in its entirety, including copyright notice and this statement.

Giggles, Guffaws, and Groaners

I renewed my car insurance over the phone today, and as I was about to hang up the woman on the other end asked if I had a pet.

I said, "Yes, I've got a dog."

She asked, "Would you like to insure him too?"

I said, "No thanks, he can't drive!" 

I told my cat that I'm going to teach him to speak English.

He looked at me and said, "Me, how?"



Customer: Waiter, I'm in a hurry! Will the pancakes be long?

Waiter: No sir, round. 



IPappy sees Little Johnny walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya going boy?"

The Johnny smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting Peggy-Sue."

The Father said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern."

"Sure Pa, I know," Johnny said, "and look what you got!" 

Your dog's barking at the back door. Your spouse's barking at the front. Who do you let in?

Well, it's your call, but the dog'll stop barking when you let him in.

My dentist was voted "Dentist Of The Year"....

He didn't get a trophy, they just gave him a little plaque. 

"Why did you choose to be cremated?"

"Being cremated is my last chance to have a smoking hot body!" 

Why was the seafood restaurant being investigated by the IRS?

They were suspected of being a shell company in some fishy business. 

A man who hadn't attended church in years suddenly began attending faithfully on Sunday mornings instead of going fishing as was his normal habit.

The pastor was highly gratified and at the end of service one morning told him, "How wonderful it makes me feel to see you at services with your good wife!"

"Well, Preacher," said the fisherman, "Quite honestly, it's a matter of choice. I'd much rather hear your sermon than hers." 

She was in the kitchen doing the boiled eggs for breakfast.

He walks in and she says, "You've got to make love to me this very moment!"

He says, "What's going on?"

She says, "The egg timer is broken." 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Count August 4,2021

How gummies are made - In reverse

New Spice!

 

Toxic Masculinity

 

Tokyo Olympics 2021 Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympic Medal Count Aug 3, 2021

Be Kind

 

Carol the chicken

Science and Covid 19

 

Tokyo 2021 Olympics Medal Count

 

Tokyo Olympics Medal Standings Aug 2, 2021

Based on population - and the ability to pick the cream of the crop would account for China  and the US to be in first place - simply more and better athletes to choose from. Those countries with smaller populations the medal to population ratio is actually higher. Just my opinion.

Windows 11 update...

 

New Windows error codes released for upcomimg Windows 11

Winerr 000 - Unexpected Intelligent User Detected; Please Reload Everything

Winerr 001 - Intimidation Failed; Attempting to Crash Repeatedly

Winerr 002 - Erroneous Error; No Error Occurred (Yet)

Winerr 003 - RAM Depleted; Annex China (Y/N)?

Winerr 004 - Deluxe Error Required. Please Send $75 to Upgrade Your Error

Winerr 005 - Long File Name Error; Disk Erased to Make Room for Filename

Winerr 006 - Insufficient RAM to Crash Properly; Attempting Fake Crash

Winerr 007 - Alphanumeric Sequence "iMAC" Prohibited

Winerr 008 - This License Has Expired; Please Purchase Another Copy

Winerr 009 - Error Buffer Overflow; Too Many Errors

Winerr 00A - Non-Microsoft Application Encountered, Not Our Fault. Really.

Winerr 00B - Push Error; Removing Files to Make Room for Advertisement

Winerr 00C - Windows Loaded Correctly This Time, That's 1.

Winerr 00D - User Error; Lemming Not Found

Winerr 00E - Open Standard Encountered; Attempting to Redmondize

Winerr 00F - Reserved for Future Coding Errors

Winerr 010 - Virus Error - Other Applications Will Be Closed Instead

Winerr 011 - Orwell Not Found; You Must Use Microsoft Edge

Winerr 012 - Cash Underflow - Credit Card Number Will Be Assimilated

Winerr 013 - Keyboard Error; User Must Learn to Slow Down

Winerr 014 - User Error; Reading License Agreement Mandatory to Continue

Winerr 015 - Error Message Deleted

Winerr 016 - Expected Error Did Not Occur; Attempting to Restart Error Sequence

Winerr 017 - Multitasking Attempted; System Confused

Winerr 018 - Network Error - Your Crash Will Be Replicated to All Stations

Winerr 019 - Freedom-of-Choice Error; Select a Microsoft Browser To Continue

Winerr 01A - Insult Detected -- Your Bill Gates Joke Will Be Deleted

Winerr 01B - Error Removing Temp File; a Permanent File Will Be Substituted

Winerr 01C - Wrong Disk Formatted. Sorry About That.

Winerr 01D - Mandatory Error Inserted to Meet Error Quota

Winerr 01E - Please Insert Your Favorite Error Here

Winerr 01F - Error In Progress; Please Wait....

Winerr 020 - Unknown Error Occurred But Was Lost. Windows Will Try To Remember

Winerr 021 - Error Parsing Error List; Please Wait For Next Error

Winerr 022 - Upgrade Error; Please Format Your Drive And Reload Everything

Winerr 042 - Error Explaining Meaning Of Life. Sorry You Have To Buy The Book.

Winerr 666 - TRUMP Virus Found. Hit Enter For Global Thermonuclear War

Seriously, Switch to Ubuntu. You won't be disappointed!

Rob Peter to pay Paul

 

 

The expression was well enough established in English for it to have been considered proverbial by John Heywood when he published A Dialogue conteinyng the nomber in effect of all the Prouerbes in the Englishe tongue in 1546:

    Rob Peter and pay Paul: thou sayest I do;
    But thou robbest and poulst Peter and Paul too

The phrase was also in use in other European countries and was known in France by at least 1611, when Cotgrave produced A Dictionarie of the French and English Tongues:

    Découvrir Saint Pierre pour couvrir Saint Paul [Strip Peter to clothe Paul]

Rob Peter to pay Paul. The precise date is not the only aspect of this phrase that is somewhat uncertain. Scholars also disagree as to the thinking of whoever coined it. Given that any two names would work in a 'rob X to pay Y' proverb, why choose Peter and Paul? It has been suggested that the primary reason for Peter and Paul is the alliteration, that is, the same reason that Jack was paired with Jill when they went up the hill. That may well be part of the story, but there's surely more to it. The similarities between Saint Peter and Saint Paul go deeper than their sharing of the letter P.

The expression was coined at a time when almost all English people were Christian and they would have been well used to hearing Peter and Paul paired together. They were both apostles of Christ, both martyred in Rome and shared the Feast Day on 29th June. This commemoration now passes by with little mention, but not so in medieval England. The essence of the meaning of 'rob Peter to pay Paul' is the pointlessness of taking from one only to give to another who was similar. There are many churches of Saint Peter and Saint Paul in England and throughout Europe. It may not be the case that, as Peter Heylyn asserted, that the phrase arose from the borrowing of money from one church to fund another, but from the familiarity of the notion of Peter and Paul being alike and inseparable.

A most wonderful Lammas - Blessed Be!

Lammas is observed on August 1st. In some English-speaking countries in the Northern Hemisphere, August 1 is Lammas Day (Anglo-Saxon hlaf-mas, "loaf-mass"), the festival of the wheat harvest, and is the first harvest festival of the year. On this day it was customary to bring to church a loaf made from the new crop, which began to be harvested at Lammastide. The loaf was blessed, and in Anglo-Saxon England it might be employed afterwards to work magic: A book of Anglo-Saxon charms directed that the lammas bread be broken into four bits, which were to be placed at the four corners of the barn, to protect the garnered grain. In many parts of England, tenants were bound to present freshly harvested wheat to their landlords on or before the first day of August. In the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle, where it is referred to regularly, it is called "the feast of first fruits". The blessing of first fruits was performed annually in both the Eastern and Western Churches on the first or the sixth of August. Lammas coincides with the feast of St. Peter in Chains, commemorating St. Peter's miraculous deliverance from prison. (With material from: Wikipedia)

This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T

2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

DO YOU KNOW ANY PEOPLE LIKE THESE?????