Welcome to 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow!! Posting is at 10AM, Noon and 2PM CST daily. Up to 12 days of posts on the main page. The archives have more. You can forward posts by clicking on the envelope at the bottom of the post. Enjoy your stay! *** If you need to contact me, or have a copyright issue, please use the "Contact The Wizard" form on the left side of 'OZ'. Original source and author is cited and credited in each post where possible. ***
Friday, January 06, 2017
ello art
by @heytvm, ello.com
by Trevor Van Meter, HeyTVM.com
That moment when you see the infinite possibilities of 2017! Let's do this!
by Trevor Van Meter, HeyTVM.com
That moment when you see the infinite possibilities of 2017! Let's do this!
Predictions from the 1950’s
These are funny now, but they were serious back then.
1.“I’ll tell you one thing, if things keep going the way they are, its’ going to be impossible to buy a weeks groceries for $20.”
2. “Have you seen the new cars coming out next year? It won’t be long when $5000 will only buy a used one.”
3. “If cigarettes keep going up in price, I’m going to quit. A quarter a pack is ridiculous.”
4. “Did you hear the post office is thinking about charging a dime just to mail a letter?”
5. “The Government is wanting to get its hands on everything. Pretty soon it’s going to be impossible to run a family business or farm.”
6. “If they raise the minimum wage to $1, nobody will be able to hire outside help at the store.”
7. “When I first started driving, who would have thought gas would someday cost 50 cents a gallon. Guess we’d be better off leaving the car in the garage.”
8. “Kids today are impossible. Those duck tail hair cuts make it impossible to stay groomed. Next thing you know, boys will be wearing their hair as long as the girls.”
9. “Also, their music drives me wild. This ‘Rock Around The Clock’ thing is nothing but racket.”
10. “I’m afraid to send my kids to the movies any more. Ever since they let Clark Gable get by with saying ‘damn’ in ‘Gone With The Wind,’ it seems every movie has a ‘hell’ or a ‘damn’ in it.”
11. “Also, it won’t be long until couples are sleeping in the same bed in the movies. What is this world coming to?”
12. “Marilyn Monroe is now showing her bra and panties, so apparently there are no standards anymore.”
 |
| Atomic Flying Car |
2. “Have you seen the new cars coming out next year? It won’t be long when $5000 will only buy a used one.”
3. “If cigarettes keep going up in price, I’m going to quit. A quarter a pack is ridiculous.”
4. “Did you hear the post office is thinking about charging a dime just to mail a letter?”
5. “The Government is wanting to get its hands on everything. Pretty soon it’s going to be impossible to run a family business or farm.”
6. “If they raise the minimum wage to $1, nobody will be able to hire outside help at the store.”
7. “When I first started driving, who would have thought gas would someday cost 50 cents a gallon. Guess we’d be better off leaving the car in the garage.”
8. “Kids today are impossible. Those duck tail hair cuts make it impossible to stay groomed. Next thing you know, boys will be wearing their hair as long as the girls.”
9. “Also, their music drives me wild. This ‘Rock Around The Clock’ thing is nothing but racket.”
10. “I’m afraid to send my kids to the movies any more. Ever since they let Clark Gable get by with saying ‘damn’ in ‘Gone With The Wind,’ it seems every movie has a ‘hell’ or a ‘damn’ in it.”
11. “Also, it won’t be long until couples are sleeping in the same bed in the movies. What is this world coming to?”
12. “Marilyn Monroe is now showing her bra and panties, so apparently there are no standards anymore.”
Thursday, January 05, 2017
Quick Factoid
If a slow-moving bicycle passes a parked car on an empty road, how fast does it hit the stationary wall ahead? 165 miles per hour according to the most popular model of laser gun...
--more--
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Wednesday, January 04, 2017
The 50 Least Likely Things You'll Hear at a Wal-Mart
1) "Thank you."
2) "We can actually move in the Receiving bay."
3) "May I help you?"
4) "I love my job."
5) "Yes, the manager's here, hard at work."
6) "Wow. I got paid more than I thought I would."
7) "The customer is always right, so here's your refund."
8) "Take five."
9) "I'm worried about the store manager- I'm afraid that he's working himself to death."
10) "Try the snack bar. They have the best food you've ever had."
11) "Why would I want to leave here for a better paying job?"
12) "These valuable career skills will get me far in life."
13) "Well done."
14) "The manager will be in any minute. I can hardly wait."
15) "The bathroom is so clean, I think I'll eat my lunch there."
16) "There's no one named Bubba or Earline that works here."
17) "Hello, I'm the manager. How may I resolve your problem?"
18) "Let me get that for you."
19) "We're almost out of Bibles and Star Wars merchandise."
20) "Why are you so happy?"
21) "I'm bringing my little girl with me tomorrow for 'Bring Your Daughter to Work Day' and she's so excited!"
22) "My kid said yesterday that when he grows up, he wants to work here, too."
23) "Who was that nice young associate who'd helped me?"
24) "After I aced my aptitude tests, the counselor said that I'd be best suited for either rocket science, neurology, or working at a Wal-Mart. Obviously, I made the right choice."
25) "I've never been sexually harassed or have had sex with any member of store management."
26) "I'm going to Europe this summer for my vacation."
27) "Don't these little blue vests look adorable?"
28) "I talked my friend into leaving his six figure a year job to work here."
29) "…and when I told the loan officer that I worked for Wal-Mart, he immediately wrote out the check right there in the bank."
30) "This store has been here a year already and not one customer has brought a personal injury suit against us."
31) "We have too many cashiers on duty."
32) "Yes, I can fix that problem."
33) "I always thought that I had to work until I was 65, but thanks to Wal-Mart, I can put in for early retirement."
34) "…and the manager listened with rapt attention to every word I said."
35) "Thank God I rejected Microsoft's and IBM's offers to come in on the ground floor and went to work for Wal-Mart, instead."
36) "I can see myself here twenty years from now."
37) "I can see myself here a year from now."
38) "What I love about being a/an (insert any job title) is the variety and challenge."
39) "God, that last CBL was murder!"
40) "At our last high school reunion, my wife rubbed it everyone's faces that I work for Wal-Mart."
41) "So I stood up and said, 'I don't care how much money you offer me, Mr. Gates; Wal-Mart can beat your offer.'"
42) "…and after my surgery, the manager told me not to come in until I could walk."
43) "Everything they say in the Wal-Mart commercials is true."
44) "Where do you people come by this high quality help?"
45) "My kid never tells his friends that I work here; He hates to brag."
46) "Whenever I feel blue, I just remind myself that I work at Wal-Mart."
47) "Isn't Wal-Mart culture and haute culture kind of the same thing?"
48) "It's amazing, isn't it, how Wal-Mart can do so well and still co-exist with a thriving downtown?"
49) "…so, based on your excellent performance review, I'm raising your rate of pay so that it actually exceeds the cost of living."
50) "What do you know! They actually are as friendly, attractive and relatively sane as in the commercials!"
2) "We can actually move in the Receiving bay."
3) "May I help you?"
4) "I love my job."
5) "Yes, the manager's here, hard at work."
6) "Wow. I got paid more than I thought I would."
7) "The customer is always right, so here's your refund."
8) "Take five."
9) "I'm worried about the store manager- I'm afraid that he's working himself to death."
10) "Try the snack bar. They have the best food you've ever had."
11) "Why would I want to leave here for a better paying job?"
12) "These valuable career skills will get me far in life."
13) "Well done."
14) "The manager will be in any minute. I can hardly wait."
15) "The bathroom is so clean, I think I'll eat my lunch there."
16) "There's no one named Bubba or Earline that works here."
17) "Hello, I'm the manager. How may I resolve your problem?"
18) "Let me get that for you."
19) "We're almost out of Bibles and Star Wars merchandise."
20) "Why are you so happy?"
21) "I'm bringing my little girl with me tomorrow for 'Bring Your Daughter to Work Day' and she's so excited!"
22) "My kid said yesterday that when he grows up, he wants to work here, too."
23) "Who was that nice young associate who'd helped me?"
24) "After I aced my aptitude tests, the counselor said that I'd be best suited for either rocket science, neurology, or working at a Wal-Mart. Obviously, I made the right choice."
25) "I've never been sexually harassed or have had sex with any member of store management."
26) "I'm going to Europe this summer for my vacation."
27) "Don't these little blue vests look adorable?"
28) "I talked my friend into leaving his six figure a year job to work here."
29) "…and when I told the loan officer that I worked for Wal-Mart, he immediately wrote out the check right there in the bank."
30) "This store has been here a year already and not one customer has brought a personal injury suit against us."
31) "We have too many cashiers on duty."
32) "Yes, I can fix that problem."
33) "I always thought that I had to work until I was 65, but thanks to Wal-Mart, I can put in for early retirement."
34) "…and the manager listened with rapt attention to every word I said."
35) "Thank God I rejected Microsoft's and IBM's offers to come in on the ground floor and went to work for Wal-Mart, instead."
36) "I can see myself here twenty years from now."
37) "I can see myself here a year from now."
38) "What I love about being a/an (insert any job title) is the variety and challenge."
39) "God, that last CBL was murder!"
40) "At our last high school reunion, my wife rubbed it everyone's faces that I work for Wal-Mart."
41) "So I stood up and said, 'I don't care how much money you offer me, Mr. Gates; Wal-Mart can beat your offer.'"
42) "…and after my surgery, the manager told me not to come in until I could walk."
43) "Everything they say in the Wal-Mart commercials is true."
44) "Where do you people come by this high quality help?"
45) "My kid never tells his friends that I work here; He hates to brag."
46) "Whenever I feel blue, I just remind myself that I work at Wal-Mart."
47) "Isn't Wal-Mart culture and haute culture kind of the same thing?"
48) "It's amazing, isn't it, how Wal-Mart can do so well and still co-exist with a thriving downtown?"
49) "…so, based on your excellent performance review, I'm raising your rate of pay so that it actually exceeds the cost of living."
50) "What do you know! They actually are as friendly, attractive and relatively sane as in the commercials!"
The 65 Year Old Mother
With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old friend of mine was able to give birth. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, I went to visit.
'May I see the new baby?' I asked.
'Not yet,' She said 'I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.'
Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, 'May I see the new baby now?'
'No, not yet,' She said.
After another few minutes had elapsed, I asked again, 'May I see the baby now?'
'No, not yet,' replied my friend.
Growing very impatient, I asked, 'Well, when can I see the baby?'
'WHEN HE CRIES!' she told me.
'WHEN HE CRIES?' I demanded.
'Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?'
'BECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM, OK?'
'May I see the new baby?' I asked.
'Not yet,' She said 'I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.'
Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, 'May I see the new baby now?'
'No, not yet,' She said.
After another few minutes had elapsed, I asked again, 'May I see the baby now?'
'No, not yet,' replied my friend.
Growing very impatient, I asked, 'Well, when can I see the baby?'
'WHEN HE CRIES!' she told me.
'WHEN HE CRIES?' I demanded.
'Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?'
'BECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM, OK?'
Tuesday, January 03, 2017
2 letters from a happy couple
To My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you with your 54 years can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel.
Please don't be perturbed - I shall be home before midnight. When the man came home, he found the following letter on the dining room table.
To My Dear Husband,
I received your letter and thank you for your honesty.
I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. At the same time, I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael my tennis coach, who, like your secretary, is also 18 years old. As a successful businessman with your excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference.
18 goes in to 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Therefore, I will not be back until lunchtime tomorrow.
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you with your 54 years can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel.
Please don't be perturbed - I shall be home before midnight. When the man came home, he found the following letter on the dining room table.
To My Dear Husband,
I received your letter and thank you for your honesty.
I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. At the same time, I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael my tennis coach, who, like your secretary, is also 18 years old. As a successful businessman with your excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference.
18 goes in to 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Therefore, I will not be back until lunchtime tomorrow.
Artist Recycles Old Hubcaps Into Stunning Animal Sculptures
Ptolemy Elrington knows exactly what to do with all of those wheel hubcaps you see littering the side of the highway. He’s spent the last 12 years recycling them into beautiful and elegant animal sculptures!
For something that’s made from road-side trash, his pieces sure do sell for a lot – his sculptures can fetch anywhere from £200 to £10,000! Check out his work to see what can be done with everyday bits of trash!
More info: hubcapcreatures.com | Facebook (h/t: mymodernmet)
For something that’s made from road-side trash, his pieces sure do sell for a lot – his sculptures can fetch anywhere from £200 to £10,000! Check out his work to see what can be done with everyday bits of trash!
More info: hubcapcreatures.com | Facebook (h/t: mymodernmet)
Touch of Grey*
 |
| Portrait of Jerry Garcia by Darren Robinson, "Touch of Gray" |
Must be getting early, clocks are running late.
Paint by number a morning sky, it’s all cold.
Dawn is breaking everywhere, light a candle, curse the glare
Draw the curtains I don’t care, but it’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
I see you’ve got your list out, say your piece and kiss off.
Guess I get the gist of it, but it’s all right
Oh well anyway, sorry that you feel that way.
Every silver linings got a touch of grey
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
It’s a lesson to me, the ablers and the beggars and the thieves
The abc’s we all think of, try to win a little love.
I know the rent is in arrears, the dog has not been fed in years
It’s even worse than it appears, but it’s all right
Cows are giving kerosene, kids can’t read at seventeen
The words they know are all obscene, but that’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
Shoe is on the hand that fits, that’s all there really is to it
Whistle through your teeth and spit, but it’s all right
Oh well a touch of grey, kinda suits me anyway,
That’s all I had to say, but it’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
It’s a lesson to me, the devils and the east and the free
The abc’s we all must face, try to save a little grace.
Paint by number a morning sky, it’s all cold.
Dawn is breaking everywhere, light a candle, curse the glare
Draw the curtains I don’t care, but it’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
I see you’ve got your list out, say your piece and kiss off.
Guess I get the gist of it, but it’s all right
Oh well anyway, sorry that you feel that way.
Every silver linings got a touch of grey
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
It’s a lesson to me, the ablers and the beggars and the thieves
The abc’s we all think of, try to win a little love.
I know the rent is in arrears, the dog has not been fed in years
It’s even worse than it appears, but it’s all right
Cows are giving kerosene, kids can’t read at seventeen
The words they know are all obscene, but that’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
Shoe is on the hand that fits, that’s all there really is to it
Whistle through your teeth and spit, but it’s all right
Oh well a touch of grey, kinda suits me anyway,
That’s all I had to say, but it’s all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
It’s a lesson to me, the devils and the east and the free
The abc’s we all must face, try to save a little grace.
*Touch of Grey - The Grateful Dead
*Touch of Gray - Darren Robinson
Monday, January 02, 2017
Hospital Chart Bloopers
Actual entries from hospital charts:
1. The patient refused autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
Waiting
Remember when you were little
and the comparing hadn't started yet
so you played with pots and pans in the kitchen
taking everything out of the cupboards
not thinking that they had their place like you
will soon eventually
you threw your true self out in the open
letting it move and ebb and flow
shyness and all
it's amazing how quickly it gets Taken, beaten down
smashed into checklists
and obligation
it's amazing how quickly your mind will confuse
different
with less
i want to run back to the fake tile
and hard salami with cucumber sandwiches
and stay there longer
and take stronger pictures in my mind
so that when i start to disassociate in the next few years
think the visits at night in the dark were my fault
i'll know what i look like when i'm in my body
when my little soul and little heart
sang her first words
and biggest concern was making music with
everything i could hold
not where is the door lock
and why is it so cold
by @loverghetto, ello.com
and the comparing hadn't started yet
so you played with pots and pans in the kitchen
taking everything out of the cupboards
not thinking that they had their place like you
will soon eventually
you threw your true self out in the open
letting it move and ebb and flow
shyness and all
it's amazing how quickly it gets Taken, beaten down
smashed into checklists
and obligation
it's amazing how quickly your mind will confuse
different
with less
i want to run back to the fake tile
and hard salami with cucumber sandwiches
and stay there longer
and take stronger pictures in my mind
so that when i start to disassociate in the next few years
think the visits at night in the dark were my fault
i'll know what i look like when i'm in my body
when my little soul and little heart
sang her first words
and biggest concern was making music with
everything i could hold
not where is the door lock
and why is it so cold
by @loverghetto, ello.com
Sunday, January 01, 2017
William Christopher Dies: Father Mulcahy Actor On ‘M.A.S.H.’ Was 84
by Ross A. Lincoln, Yahoo! TV
William Christopher, the actor best known as Father Mulcahy on the classic sitcom M.A.S.H., died today following a battle with lung cancer. He was 84, and died in his Pasadena home according to his son, John, who made the news public.
Born in Evanston, Illinois in 1932, Christopher got his start as a stage actor in the 1950s before moving into television and film. Christopher held a variety of guest roles on many 1960s shows including The Andy Griffith Show, The Patty Duke Show, and The Men from Shiloh; he would also land recurring roles on Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. – as Private Lester Hummel-, That Girl and Hogan’s Heroes.
Christopher landed his most famous role in 1972, replacing the actor who portrayed Father Mulcahy in the M.A.S.H. pilot. He would remain a series mainstay throughout the show’s 11 season run, and would reprise the character on the short-lived M.A.S.H. spinoff AfterMASH.
Christopher also held guest roles on shows such as The Love Boat, Good Times, Murder, She Wrote, and Mad About You among many others.
Christopher, whose son, Ned, is autistic, was an advocate for people with autism, devoting time to the National Autistic Society and recording public service announcements.
Born in Evanston, Illinois in 1932, Christopher got his start as a stage actor in the 1950s before moving into television and film. Christopher held a variety of guest roles on many 1960s shows including The Andy Griffith Show, The Patty Duke Show, and The Men from Shiloh; he would also land recurring roles on Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. – as Private Lester Hummel-, That Girl and Hogan’s Heroes.
Christopher landed his most famous role in 1972, replacing the actor who portrayed Father Mulcahy in the M.A.S.H. pilot. He would remain a series mainstay throughout the show’s 11 season run, and would reprise the character on the short-lived M.A.S.H. spinoff AfterMASH.
Christopher also held guest roles on shows such as The Love Boat, Good Times, Murder, She Wrote, and Mad About You among many others.
Christopher, whose son, Ned, is autistic, was an advocate for people with autism, devoting time to the National Autistic Society and recording public service announcements.
"A Happy New Year" - A short story chosen by The Wizard of 'OZ'
from The Bright Light Cafe
They were forecasting snow to begin at 7pm, and most of it was to be to the East and to the South of where she lived. Still, Emma was concerned that her daughter and son-in-law were in no hurry to leave as they were going to be traveling North. Snow is unpredictable, as can be forecasters and, besides, she was a Mom and Mom's worry.
It's not that she was anxious for them to go. It had been a rather bad weekend for them, which was so highly unusual for them all. Rebekka and Joe were always so cheerful and welcome when they came to stay. But this weekend was different. They were moody and bickering, and spoke disrespectfully to both her and her husband, Ed. She chalked it up to "end of semester tiredness" and money crunches and holiday blues. But, still, it wasn't pleasant and a tension seemed to hang in the air.
This morning Emma and Ed had gone to church while the kids slept in, and when they got home, things seemed a little better. Rebekka and Joe went to visit some friends while the couple took down the Christmas decorations and bade farewell to the Christmas season. By the time the kids returned, all the work was done and it was time for them to pack up their stuff to go home. It was snowing heavily now but, finally, the car was loaded and the kids were off. As Emma kissed her daughter "goodbye", she sensed that something was still not right and it wasn't just her worry about the snow.
"Honey," Emma said as she and Ed went back into the house after waving goodbye, "do you sense something is wrong with the kids?"
"If you mean do I think they were grumpy, yes" he answered, and flopped himself in his easy chair, turning on the football game, already in progress. The score was 10 to 3, and his team was behind.
"Well, I think something is bothering them, and I wish I knew what it was," she said as she moved to the living room to finish all the little details of cleaning up after the holiday. Soon it was time for bed and, as they snuggled down together, he mumbling about his team not making the play-offs and she mumbling about the kids, they suddenly turned to each other and started to laugh.
"Aren't we a pair!" he said. "Mumbling and grumbling like two old people!"
"We are two old people," she laughed."
"Well we're not that old," he reminded her, and kissed her good night. They lay together like two spoons in a drawer and just enjoyed that they had each other.
The next morning was New Year's Eve, and she woke up late. He had gotten himself up and off to work and let her sleep in. She stretched and got up and began her day making coffee and lazily perusing the paper. The telephone rang. It was her daughter, and she was crying.
"Sweetheart, what is it?" Emma asked, concerned.
"Oh, Mom, I've made such a mess of things. Here I am a math major and I can't even keep our finances straight!" Rebekka sobbed.
"What kind of trouble are you in?" Emma asked.
"We can't pay January's rent. Not one penny of it. We had to get the car fixed and the cell phone bills are due and we have to have food and we just don't have enough to pay the rent." Then there was silence, followed by sniffing.
"Well, darling, I suppose your Father and I could help ..."
"No Mom, I don't want you to bail us out! You have been too good to us as it is, letting us borrow your car for so long. There has to be another way!"
They both were silent for a minute. The only thing of value that the daughter had was her $1000 wedding dress. But what could get for it? Could it even be a suggestion?
"Mom, I'm thinking of selling my wedding dress. Do you think anyone would buy it?"
They had had it professionally cleaned and restored and it was a very modern style.
"You might be able to get $6 or $700 for it."
"It's the only thing I have of value except my ring, and I can't sell that. It's my own fault we are in such shape. I didn't plan well and I spent money we didn't have ..." She was still crying.
Emma thought about it. What good is a used wedding dress 20 years from now anyway? But, the lesson learned was more important. "Honey, let us do this. Let your Father give you $1000 to get you caught up. You try to sell your dress, and then put that money in the bank and use it for emergencies. Then perhaps you will remember how this feels, and you won't get yourself in this position again."
"Oh Mom, I hate to take your money!"
"Listen, sweetheart, it's not easy being married and going to school. Your husband is only a carpenter's helper. It's going to be years before you guys earn any real money. But I think for now, you need to remember that you don't have the money you had when you lived at home, and you'll have to say "no" to a lot of things you want. It's just going to be hard. And you'll just have to suck it up." She tried to say it as kindly as she could.
"OK Mom. I'll take your money. But Mom? Don't let us ask for help again.
"I will help you if you need it. You may be a married woman, but you are still my child"
"OK, but at least make us grovel?"
"You bet! Now let me get a transfer out to you this morning. And, Honey ..."
"Yes Mom?"
"Happy New Year."
"Same to you, Mom, the same to you and Daddy."
They were forecasting snow to begin at 7pm, and most of it was to be to the East and to the South of where she lived. Still, Emma was concerned that her daughter and son-in-law were in no hurry to leave as they were going to be traveling North. Snow is unpredictable, as can be forecasters and, besides, she was a Mom and Mom's worry.
It's not that she was anxious for them to go. It had been a rather bad weekend for them, which was so highly unusual for them all. Rebekka and Joe were always so cheerful and welcome when they came to stay. But this weekend was different. They were moody and bickering, and spoke disrespectfully to both her and her husband, Ed. She chalked it up to "end of semester tiredness" and money crunches and holiday blues. But, still, it wasn't pleasant and a tension seemed to hang in the air.
This morning Emma and Ed had gone to church while the kids slept in, and when they got home, things seemed a little better. Rebekka and Joe went to visit some friends while the couple took down the Christmas decorations and bade farewell to the Christmas season. By the time the kids returned, all the work was done and it was time for them to pack up their stuff to go home. It was snowing heavily now but, finally, the car was loaded and the kids were off. As Emma kissed her daughter "goodbye", she sensed that something was still not right and it wasn't just her worry about the snow.
"Honey," Emma said as she and Ed went back into the house after waving goodbye, "do you sense something is wrong with the kids?"
"If you mean do I think they were grumpy, yes" he answered, and flopped himself in his easy chair, turning on the football game, already in progress. The score was 10 to 3, and his team was behind.
"Well, I think something is bothering them, and I wish I knew what it was," she said as she moved to the living room to finish all the little details of cleaning up after the holiday. Soon it was time for bed and, as they snuggled down together, he mumbling about his team not making the play-offs and she mumbling about the kids, they suddenly turned to each other and started to laugh.
"Aren't we a pair!" he said. "Mumbling and grumbling like two old people!"
"We are two old people," she laughed."
"Well we're not that old," he reminded her, and kissed her good night. They lay together like two spoons in a drawer and just enjoyed that they had each other.
The next morning was New Year's Eve, and she woke up late. He had gotten himself up and off to work and let her sleep in. She stretched and got up and began her day making coffee and lazily perusing the paper. The telephone rang. It was her daughter, and she was crying.
"Sweetheart, what is it?" Emma asked, concerned.
"Oh, Mom, I've made such a mess of things. Here I am a math major and I can't even keep our finances straight!" Rebekka sobbed.
"What kind of trouble are you in?" Emma asked.
"We can't pay January's rent. Not one penny of it. We had to get the car fixed and the cell phone bills are due and we have to have food and we just don't have enough to pay the rent." Then there was silence, followed by sniffing.
"Well, darling, I suppose your Father and I could help ..."
"No Mom, I don't want you to bail us out! You have been too good to us as it is, letting us borrow your car for so long. There has to be another way!"
They both were silent for a minute. The only thing of value that the daughter had was her $1000 wedding dress. But what could get for it? Could it even be a suggestion?
"Mom, I'm thinking of selling my wedding dress. Do you think anyone would buy it?"
They had had it professionally cleaned and restored and it was a very modern style.
"You might be able to get $6 or $700 for it."
"It's the only thing I have of value except my ring, and I can't sell that. It's my own fault we are in such shape. I didn't plan well and I spent money we didn't have ..." She was still crying.
Emma thought about it. What good is a used wedding dress 20 years from now anyway? But, the lesson learned was more important. "Honey, let us do this. Let your Father give you $1000 to get you caught up. You try to sell your dress, and then put that money in the bank and use it for emergencies. Then perhaps you will remember how this feels, and you won't get yourself in this position again."
"Oh Mom, I hate to take your money!"
"Listen, sweetheart, it's not easy being married and going to school. Your husband is only a carpenter's helper. It's going to be years before you guys earn any real money. But I think for now, you need to remember that you don't have the money you had when you lived at home, and you'll have to say "no" to a lot of things you want. It's just going to be hard. And you'll just have to suck it up." She tried to say it as kindly as she could.
"OK Mom. I'll take your money. But Mom? Don't let us ask for help again.
"I will help you if you need it. You may be a married woman, but you are still my child"
"OK, but at least make us grovel?"
"You bet! Now let me get a transfer out to you this morning. And, Honey ..."
"Yes Mom?"
"Happy New Year."
"Same to you, Mom, the same to you and Daddy."
The Wizard's Article for Full Circle Magazine
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| Click above to read The Wizard's review of teh cool YouTube application, miniTube, in Full Circle Magazine - It's a PDF |
Laughing Chewbacca Mask Lady - Top Viewed YouTube Video of all Time
sorry cannot find the original - it's Candace Payne, in any case
The Ketchup and Fries plant
from TerritorialSeed.com
Potatoes and Tomatoes harvested off the same blimey plant! This exciting grafted combination was first introduced to U.K. home gardeners, and was a smashing success. Now this same tomato/potato grafted combination known as Ketchup 'n' Fries is being exclusively offered mail order to American gardeners by Territorial Seed Company. This thoroughly tested duo is the ultimate container plant, but will do equally well in the open garden.
ABOVE GROUND: Tomatoes
You can expect harvests of over 500 red cherry tomatoes with a Brix level of 10.2. Makes for delicious snacking, salad toppers, drying and some very sweet ketchup!
BELOW GROUND: Potatoes
Incredibly you'll be making your French fries from delicious white potatoes. They also taste great baked, mashed, or roasted.
Grafted Ketchup 'n' Fries™
Potatoes and Tomatoes harvested off the same blimey plant! This exciting grafted combination was first introduced to U.K. home gardeners, and was a smashing success. Now this same tomato/potato grafted combination known as Ketchup 'n' Fries is being exclusively offered mail order to American gardeners by Territorial Seed Company. This thoroughly tested duo is the ultimate container plant, but will do equally well in the open garden.
ABOVE GROUND: Tomatoes
You can expect harvests of over 500 red cherry tomatoes with a Brix level of 10.2. Makes for delicious snacking, salad toppers, drying and some very sweet ketchup!
BELOW GROUND: Potatoes
Incredibly you'll be making your French fries from delicious white potatoes. They also taste great baked, mashed, or roasted.
Tomatoes are members of the potato family and are therefore naturally compatible with potatoes. Each Ketchup 'n' Fries plant is hand-grafted to create this unique double cropping novelty. There is no genetic modification—it's an all-natural process.
Plants come with complete growing instructions (not that you really need them as TomTatos® are easy to grow) and a certification of authenticity to demonstrate proof to your astonished friends. They are going to think Ketchup 'n' Fries are the Bees Knees!
Ketchup 'n' Fries TomTatos are shipped in 2 1/2 inch pots in our custom designed plant shipping box so you can be sure your plant will arrive in perfect shape. Brilliant!
PLEASE READ: Available only within the contiguous US.
Visit their website to order
Plants come with complete growing instructions (not that you really need them as TomTatos® are easy to grow) and a certification of authenticity to demonstrate proof to your astonished friends. They are going to think Ketchup 'n' Fries are the Bees Knees!
Ketchup 'n' Fries TomTatos are shipped in 2 1/2 inch pots in our custom designed plant shipping box so you can be sure your plant will arrive in perfect shape. Brilliant!
PLEASE READ: Available only within the contiguous US.
Visit their website to order
Saturday, December 31, 2016
HAPPY NEW YEAR! HAPPY 150th CANADA!!!!
May the joys of the New Year bring about peace and love in the world for 2017. I wish all of my loyal 'OZ' readers a truly Happy New Year! It seems like just yesterday we had New Year 2016. Well, I wish the best for all of you for the brand new year!
Yours in 'OZ',
The Wizard.
(psst: My name is Brian...)
Yours in 'OZ',
The Wizard.
(psst: My name is Brian...)
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