The Love Doctor

Dear Love Doctor, 

 

I was at a friends the other week and we had way too much to drink and ended up sleeping with him. I’ve never thought about him sexually before at all and still don’t. We have not talked about it since it happened and I don’t know what to do because I also have a boyfriend. I obviously don’t want to keep this from my boyfriend and lie to him and don’t know how to tell him. I honestly don’t know what I would do without him. We live far from one another and I really want to tell him in person but I don’t know if that’s worse because I’m leaving it longer and longer. Should I tell him over the phone or wait and talk about it in person? 

 

Signed, 

 

Worried 

 

 

Dear Worried, 

 

People make mistakes. Some of those are small. Some of them are big. Some are on purpose and some aren’t. But the thing about mistakes is what you do with them. Some people use them as opportunities to learn. Others don’t even acknowledge them and blame others. This is your opportunity to take this mistake and learn from it. 

 

Who do you want to be after this? Tell him. And tell him exactly what you’re saying here. But also be considerate and take responsibility. Make it a conversation. And don’t expect him to take it well - he deserves to know, but that doesn’t entitle you to anything. It’s gonna be a tough conversation but it’s on you to be the honest man your boyfriend deserves. Set the record straight and set the two of you on a pattern of honesty and communication, if you can work through this and remain together. 

 

Good luck guy. 

 

Hope this helps, 

 

The Love Doctor

 

--Send your questions about love to "The Love Doctor" directly from 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow! I have added an email link that goes direct to The Love Doctor - this will enable quicker responses from him. You can do this by clicking on his picture in the sidebar and put your question in the email. This will ensure that The Love Doctor gets your question. The Love Doctor forwards his replies to me for posting consideration. Note: Due to the high volume of letters that The Love Doctor receives, not all letters will be posted on 'OZ' - but the Love Doctor will reply to every email. (so he says)