LAWYER: Have you any grounds?
POLISH GUY: JA, JA, an acre and half and a nice little home with 3 bedrooms.
LAWYER "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLISH GUY: "It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," he responded.
LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"
POLISH GUY: "No," he replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."
LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"
POLISH GUY: "All my relations are in Poland."
LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLISH GUY: "Yes, we have hi fidelity stereo set & DVD player with 6.1 sound. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes."
LAWYER: No, I mean Does your wife beat you up?
POLISH GUY: No, I'm always up before her.
LAWYER: Why do you want this divorce?
POLISH GUY: She going to kill me.
LAWYER: What makes you think that?
POLISH GUY: I got proof.
LAWYER: What kind of proof?
POLISH GUY: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at the drug store and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read -- it says, "Polish Remover."