ON WHAT A UNIQUE CONCEPT!
"Justice ought to be fair."
--President George W. Bush, speaking at the White House Economic Conference
ON CLICHÉS, CLUMSY
"We’ll cross that bridge when we fall off it."
--former Canadian prime minister Lester Pearson
ON PROBLEMS UNDERSTANDING THE CONCEPT OF HALF
"We started with 53,000 people. Half are gone, but surprisingly, most are still here!"
--sportscaster Jerry Coleman
ON TESTIMONY, A LITTLE TOO SPECIFIC
Lawyer: I would like you to turn to the next page, dated June 9, 1993.
Plaintiff: Yes.
Lawyer: Do you recall this incident occurring?
Plaintiff: Yes. The night before that I had eaten at Beachcomber’s Restaurant. And I had crab. And I had vomited in the —
Lawyer: I assure you on this question a simple “Yes” or “No” will do.
--recorded in court testimony
ON GOD, YOU MUST BE POPULAR
Q: We’ve heard you like throwing drinks in people’s faces and then walking away.
Actress Lara Flynn Boyle: The people I hang out with have sense. They’ll just say something like, “Thanks, I was getting a little thirsty.”"
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