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Tuesday, October 04, 2016

"Scuse me while I kiss this guy"....

Madonna and ex-Goodie and TV bird expert Bill Oddie Madonna and ex-Goodie and TV bird expert Bill Oddie may be an strange partnership but they are united by song.

Some people in a survey thought a line in her song Erotica ("Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body") was "Bill Oddie, Bill Oddie, put your hands all over my body".

Jimi Hendrix's "kiss the sky" in Purple Haze becomes "kiss this guy".

You have responded magnificently to our request for your own favourites - and most have produced plenty of amusement in the Sky News office.

Here are your best oops:

Instead of the line "I want to sex you up" in the Colour Me Bad song, an old school friend of mine used to sing "I'm homosexual". Also once heard somebody sing Cool & The Gang's Celebration but changed "What's your pleasure" to "What's the weather". Also finally a close friend if mine used to change R Kelly's "You've got that vibe" to "You've got those thighs"
--Louise, Berks

When Meatloaf sang "I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram, on a silver black phantom bike", I thought he was singing "I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram, I'm a Cilla Black fan on a bike".
--Nick Pettigrew, Macclesfield

I thought that Simon and Garfunkel's The Boxer had the lyric "Asking only workman's wages I come looking for a job, but I get no offers, just a come-on from the horse on Seventh Avenue."
--Geoff, Lincoln

I thought Macy Gray's song 'I Try' says "I wore goggles when you are not near" when really its "my world crumbles when you are not near".
--Gila Rabinowitz, Jerusalem

"My world crumbles when you are not here" becomes "I wore bubbles when you are not here"
--Maria, Dublin - mailed at exactly the same time as the previous one!

The great Police track Message In A Bottle contains the lyric "the years have passed since I wrote my note" which seems to be sung as "the years have passed since I broke my nose"
--Phil, London

My mum used to genuinely think that Come On Eileen by the excellent Dexi's Midnight Runners was Come On Ali after the great boxer. I still sing it that way.
--Andrew, Swansea

For years my sister Trisha sang "the lift goes up" instead of the correct words "love lifts up" from the theme tune to An Officer And A Gentleman.
--Marie, Slough

My wife thought that Hey Mr Tambourine Man by The Byrds was Hamish The Tambourine Man.
--Michael Peel, Blyth

Marc Almond - Say Hello, Wave Goodbye (also covered by David Gray) the line "You're used to wearing less" my friend always thought it was "You used to wear Ellesse" (as in the trainers)
--Sonia, Cork

Musical Note I once worked with a girl in Wicklow who honestly thought that the lyrics to a certain tune were: At the Coca, Coca Banana. She used to go around the office singing it (which is pretty bad regardless of what lyrics you use). She actually tried to convince me there was no such thing as a 'Copacabana' and that I was making up my lyrics!
--Brian, Dublin

Howard Jones sung "I don't want to be hip and cool" (I think) in his 1984 hit What Is Love?. I thought he was saying, "I don't want to be Hit Van Doon". I was never sure who Hit Van Doon was but he sounded pretty cool to me.
--George, London

I always thought that Abba were singing "When the bus had to go" instead of "One of us had to go".
--Kaye Freestone, Preston

I also recently thought Christina Aguilera was incredibly vulgar, when I misheard a line from her Genie In A Bottle as "come on baby lick me out". A friend told me a while later that it was actually "come on baby let me out".
--Harriet, London

I have a friend who thought that 'strike a pose' in Madonna's Vogue was 'strike the post'. She knows all the words to the rap bit in the middle, though.
--Laura Wood, Essex

My girlfriend sang "I wanna be your dog" instead of "I wanna be adored" by the Stone Roses. She sang it wrong for about 10 years.
--Phil Hancocks, Croydon

I thought for years that Adam Ant Stand And Deliver was "stand in your dinner". God knows how I worked that one out.
--Thomas Castle, Dunfermline

I wondered why Robbie Williams was singing about waiting for a dozen angels until my wife told me the lyrics were "I sit and wait, does an angel."
--Graham Meadows, Lowestoft

You have missed two of the best. Both are by the Police: "Massage in a brothel" and "Sue Lawley".
--Steve, Basingstoke - and many others with the second.

An ex-girlfriend used to think that the chorus to Ultavox's classic Vienna was "old piano".
--Terry, Oxford

My best friend at school thought Madonna's 'Papa don't preach' was 'Puppet on a bridge'
--Cat, Earlsfield

I always thought the first line of Desmond Dekker's Israelites was "Wake up in the morning, baked beans for breakfast"
--Louise, Chelmsford

I used to think the 60s soul record take Me To The River said "Take me to the river and watch me drown" rather than "wash me down".
--Graeme, Alva

I always thought that the 80s hit 'King Of Rock 'N' Roll' by Prefab Sprout, went 'Hot dog, jumping frog, 'Alpen Cookie' rather than 'Albuquerque'.
--Bethan, London

A few weeks ago Bohemian Rhapsody came on in our local pub and my friend was singing along to it. However her lyrics to "beelzebub has a devil put aside for me" became Musical Note "beelzebub has a devil on the sideboard". On another occasion I caught my husband singing "oh we are sailing" instead of the traditional "all we are saying" to the song Give Peace a Chance.
--HG, Doncaster

My aunt sang "I've got a rickshaw and i want to paint it black" ("I've got a red door and I want to paint it black") Rolling Stones
--Darren Lovatt, Sweden

My girlfriend Lisa sang: "Guns don't kill people rabbits do" by Goldie Lookin Chain. Obviously it was "rappers". At first I thought she knew and was joking but into the second week I had to say something and she wasn't.
--Dave, Pontefract

The White Stripes' "I think I smell a rat". The first time I heard it I thought he was singing 'I think I smell alright'
--Lindsay Cockcroft

Oasis' Champagne Super Nova: I used to sing "Champagne to Pinochio" I really can't figure out now how I ever heard those words in it. But I sang it for ages before a friend told me the real lyrics.
--Kerry Byrne, Wicklow

My work colleague yesterday was singing M People's One Night In Heaven - "one night, one night, ooohhooo one night in Devon".
--Anna, Lincoln

In Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal, I always thought he was singing "Eddie are you ok?" instead of "Annie are you ok". I still sing my lyrics when I hear the song which drives my boyfriend mad.
--Debbie, London

Desmond Dekker's Israelites becomes "me ears are alight".
--Lindy, Suffolk

Abba's One Of Us. There is a line in there somewhere stating: 'one of us had to go' I have heard people singing along to the song turning that into: 'when the bus had to go'
--Paul Goes, Luxembourg

I have two friends who used to sing Bob Marley's No Woman, No Cry but they thought the chorus was "No Woman, No Pride".
--Damian, Kildare

UB40's "I am a one in ten was interpreted by my brother as " I have a one inch head" Love it!
--Nic Graham, London

At school I had a friend who thought the line 'Guilty, guilty as a girl can be' from the Bananarama song 'Love In The First Degree' was 'Guilty, guilty as a dunken flea'.
--Sam, Leeds

How Deep Is Your Love by the Bee Gees: "and you come to me on a submarine" - is supposed to be "and you come to me on a summer breeze" - I have always thought those were the words.
--Shelley Cross, London

In Bonnie Tyler's It's A Heartache, my wife always sings "she's got 400 children and a crop in the field" instead of "she's got four hungry children."
--Steve Baldock, West Sussex

Steve has his own problems if he thinks Bonnie Tyler included those lyrics in It's A Heartache. They are actually from Kenny Rogers' song Lucille.
--Christy Murphy, Dublin

Ataris - The Boys Of Summer: "Your brown skin shinin' in the sun" actually sounds like "Your bra strap is shinin' in the sun"
--Andy H, Warrington

In the theme tune for Ghostbusters, when they sing "Ghostbusters" it sounds like "those b******s"
--Lee B, Herts

In Shanice "I Love Your Smile" the line "Sitting in my class, just drifting away" always goes into my head as "Sitting in my class, just stripped to the waist". It certainly makes an innocent song seem rather saucy!
--Gina-Luisa Hilborne, Woolacombe, Devon

Musical Note A friend of mine, when she was in Primary School, used to sing "if you're happy and you know it clap your hands, if you're happy and you know it clap your hands, if you're happy and you know it, Tangerines want to know it. We still laugh about it now.
--Louise Knott, Cardiff

I once heard a guy ask for a copy of Liver Pate by Bad Manners in my local record shop - he meant Lip Up Fatty. The poor bloke nearly died of embarrassment when his mistake was pointed out, much to everybody's amusement.
--Dominic, Clevedon

Angie by the Rolling Stones became - wait for it - Andy
--Ian Wilson, Spain

Losing my religion - REM. Always wondered what the correct lyrics are but it sounds like they are singing "Calling Cheryl Baker, calling Cheryl Baker".
--Nanda Braithwaite, Farnborough

Nanda - that REM song was The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonight (actual lyric No Need To Wake Her Up). Madonna's La Isla Bonita - "young girl with eyes like potatoes" instead of "like the desert".
--Geoff Banks, Warrington

Geoff and Nanda, according to the printed lyrics for the Sidewinder Sleeps Tonight, it's Call Me When You Try To Wake Her UP
--Clare, Dublin

My brother-in-law used to sing "home, home on the range, where the deer and the cantalope roam". And I'm sure John Denver's fella never "talked to the fish in the trees" - my husband only recently put me straight on that one.
--Anna, Birmingham


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