Jennifer Derringer, Hotel Maid
“Show me in the Bible where it says ‘thou shall not engage in sinful sexual acts with another man,’ and that ‘that same man should also not be trafficking drugs to you’ all in the same sentence.”
Darren Kroll, Elevator Repairman
“Maybe if his wife were a man who provided him with crystal meth, this poor guy wouldn't have had to go searching for other ways to satisfy his urges.”
Carl Lapis, Floor Refinisher “You see, this is exactly the kind of thing that happens when drug dealers get involved with religion.”
*The Onion
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