Retirement homes getting expensive?

Senior Health Care Solution

So you're a senior citizen and the government says no health care or pension for you, what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot 2 MP’s and 2 Senior Government Officials.

Of Course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will get 3 meals a day, a roof over your head, and all the health care you need! New teeth, no problem. Need glasses, great. New hip, knees, kidney, lungs, heart? All covered.

And who will be paying for all of this? The same government that just told you that you are too old for health care. Plus, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any income taxes anymore.

IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY OR WHAT?!

*Thanks, Bright Eyes

La Presse en Rose

Senators: Lift ban on gays donating blood

By The Associated Press, 365gay.com

(Washington) The time has come to change a policy that imposes a lifetime ban on donating blood for any man who has had gay sex since 1977, 18 senators said Thursday. “Not a single piece of scientific evidence supports the ban,” said Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., who joined 16 other Democrats and independent Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont in writing Food and Drug Administration Commissioner Margaret Hamburg.

The lawmakers stressed that the science has changed dramatically since the ban was established in 1983 at the advent of the HIV-AIDS crisis. Today donated blood must undergo two different, highly accurate tests that make the risk of tainted blood entering the blood supply virtually zero, they said.

The senators said that while hospitals and emergency rooms are in urgent need of blood products, “healthy blood donors are turned away every day due to an antiquated policy and our blood supply is not necessarily any safer for it.”

Brian Moulton, chief legislative counsel for the Human Rights Campaign,the nation’s largest gay rights group, said they are hopeful that the policy, last reviewed in 2006, will change under President Barack Obama, “who is interested in looking at all the policies that have a discriminatory effect.” The goal, he said, is “to have policies in place that are based on the science” rather than “any discriminatory idea about our community.”

The senators’ letter noted that in March 2006, the American Red Cross, America’s Blood Centers and the American Association of Blood Banks reported to an FDA-sponsored workshop that the ban “is medically and scientifically unwarranted.”

The FDA, in a statement, said that “while FDA appreciates concerns about perceived discrimination, our decision to maintain the deferral policy is based on current science and data and does not give weight to a donor’s sexual orientation.”

It said that while some groups favor relaxing restrictions, others, “such as those representing the hemophilia community, support continuation of the current policy.”

People with hemophilia, a bleeding disorder, require periodic transfusions and in the past, before screening techniques were improved to ensure blood was HIV-free, were among those most at risk of contracting the virus.

Kerry compared the effort to lift the blood donation ban to legislation he backed in 2008 to end the law banning people with HIV from traveling and immigrating to the United States. That ban was lifted last year.

Also signing the letter were Kirsten Gillibrand of New York, Dick Durbin and Roland Burris of Illinois, Daniel Akaka of Hawaii, Sheldon Whitehouse of Rhode Island, Sherrod Brown of Ohio, Frank Lautenberg of New Jersey, Bob Casey of Pennsylvania, Russ Feingold of Wisconsin, Mark Udall and Michael Bennet of Colorado, Al Franken of Minnesota, Maria Cantwell of Washington, Carl Levin of Michigan, Tom Harkin of Iowa, and Mark Begich of Alaska.

1 in 2 LGBT regularly cyberbullied

By Ruth Schneider, 365gay.com

One out of every two LGBT youths are the victims of cyberbullying, a new Iowa State University study found. In a study of 444 junior high, high school and college age students between the ages of 11 and 22, the researchers found 54 percent reported an incident of cyberbullying within the past month. Cyberbullying, in the study, included “electronic distribution of humiliating photos, dissemination of false or private information, or targeting victims in cruel online polls,” according to an ISU statement.

The bullying resulted in a range of negative emotions, researchers said. More than 1 in 4 in the study reported suicidal thoughts, 28 percent felt anxious about school and nearly half (45 percent) expereince depression.

“There’s a saying that we’ve now changed to read, ‘Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can kill,’ “ said Warren Blumenfeld, the study’s lead author, in the statement. “And especially at this age – pre-adolescence through adolescence – this is a time when peer influences are paramount in a young person’s life. If one is ostracized and attacked, that can have devastating consequences – not only physically, but on their emotional health for the rest of their lives.”

Synagogue offers same-sex blessings

By Brenda Suderman,The Canadian Press

Winnipeg's largest synagogue is moving toward full inclusion for gay and lesbian Jews by offering to bless their same-sex unions. Since Jan. 1, 2010, rabbis at Shaarey Zedek synagogue have been willing to bless Jewish same-sex couples in commitment ceremonies. So far, no couples have come forward to request the ritual, says the associate rabbi. "There is a concerted movement to create a set of ceremonial practices and alternative documents," explains Rabbi Lawrence Pinsker, who says January is not typically a time couples think of planning weddings. "The decision was to offer in sequential fashion to add to the level of accessibility in certain rituals." The move to offer same-sex blessing is the final step of a three-stage effort to include gay and lesbian Jews into the life of the congregation.

In 2008, the Wellington Crescent synagogue allowed same-sex couples to buy joint burial plots at its cemetery on Main Street and Anderson Avenue, across from Kildonan Park. In 2009, the synagogue extended the benefits of family membership to same-sex couples, a change from the previous practice of both partners buying individual memberships. Gays and lesbians were also extended the full rights of membership on that date.

The move to offer blessings to same-sex couples is about equality, says Rabbi Alan Green, who first raised the subject at the synagogue's celebration of High Holy Days in 2007.

"It's a simple matter of justice," he said in an interview before he left on sabbatical late last year. "Why shouldn't same-sex couples be sanctified?"
He says Jewish scripture uses the term sanctified for male-female couples and traditionally same-sex couples were forbidden marriage.

"Based on our understanding of sexual orientation, it seems to be genetic, seems to be part of God's creation, which we need to honour and sanctify."
The synagogue is stopping just short of marrying same-sex couples, with Green or other clergy offering to bless them and lead commitment ceremonies.

Green says the Winnipeg synagogue is thought to be the first Conservative movement synagogue in Canada to offer blessings to same-sex unions. In December 2006, the movement's New York-based Committee on Jewish Law and Standards approved extending blessings to same-sex unions, a move that carries a great deal of weight among Conservative congregations, but is not binding, says Green.

Winnipeg's other Conservative synagogue, Congregation Etz Chayim, does not extend blessings to same-sex couples and is not considering the move, says Rabbi Larry Lander.

"Shaarey Zedek has recently gone forward, and we're not going forward at this time," he says.

Although this is a new step for Conservative Judaism, considered more middle of the road, Winnipeg's lone Reform synagogue has offered the ritual for a decade, says Rabbi Karen Soria.

"We are still the only synagogue in Winnipeg where a gay or lesbian couple could be married Jewishly," says Soria, who divides her time between Winnipeg and Ottawa, where her female partner is a chaplain in the Canadian military.

"Reform Judaism has taken very seriously the need to open doors and be welcoming. Historically, Reform Judaism has been very aware of and studies the seismic changes in Jewish life over the centuries."

The Reform movement is considered one of the more liberal Jewish groups. An activist in the gay rights movement says the door is only partially open to Jewish same-sex couples, since Shaarey Zedek is not offering to marry them.

"I'm fully supportive of full inclusion and equal treatment to heterosexual counterparts in all life cycle events and rituals," says Judy Plotkin, who describes herself as an "out" Jewish lesbian. Other than her 2006 wedding, Plotkin says all of her family life cycle events have taken place at Shaarey Zedek synagogue.
Pinsker acknowledges that blessings are not the same as marriage, but the move is a step in the process toward full equality.

"I think its long overdue, number one. I think historical restraints (toward same-sex unions) can be overcome in Jewish law and have been." For Green, the decision makes sense both theological and culturally, and was influenced by the 2005 legalization of same-sex marriage in Canada.

"The barriers, I'm convinced, are just in our mind," says Green about theological issues around same-sex marriages. "If we would look at the way God looks at it, I don't think the barriers would exist."

brenda@suderman.com
Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition January 30, 2010

Catholic preschool won’t let student return because of lesbian parents

By Ruth Schneider, 365gay.com

A Catholic preschool in Boulder, Colo., will not be getting an “A” for Acceptance after telling a lesbian couple their child is not allowed to return to the school next year.

Sacred Heart of Jesus Catholic School decided a student would not be allowed to enroll as a result of the sexual orientation of the child’s parents, according to an NBC 9 News report.

In a statement to 9 News, the Denver Archdiocese wrote that parents at the school are expected to follow teachings of the Catholic Church including that “Homosexual couples living together as a couple are in disaccord with Catholic teaching.”

“No person shall be admitted as a student in any Catholic school unless that person and his/her parent(s) subscribe to the school’s philosophy and agree to abide by the educational policies and regulations of the school and Archdiocese,” the Archdiocese’s statement explained.

The news station reports legal experts stated it is legal for the school to enforce the discriminatory policy.

More men file sexual harassment suits

By The Associated Press

(WASHINGTON) Jonathan Pilkington’s boss wouldn’t take no for an answer.

During more than two years as a food runner at an upscale steakhouse in Scottsdale, Ariz., Pilkington says his male supervisor groped, fondled and otherwise sexually harassed him more than a dozen times.

“It was very embarrassing,” Pilkington said. “I felt like I had to do something because the situation was just so bad.”

Now Pilkington, a married father of two, is the star witness in a federal lawsuit against Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse & Wine Bar and one of a growing number of men claiming they are victims of sexual harassment in the workplace.

From 1990 to 2009, the percentage of sexual harassment claims filed by men has doubled from 8 percent to 16 percent of all claims, according to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

Women still file the overwhelming majority of sexual harassment claims with the EEOC and state and local agencies. But lawyers at the commission say they’ve noticed the increase in complaints by men – more than 2,000 were filed in 2009 out of about 12,700 cases.

Male claims made up about 12 percent of all cases a decade ago, but the percentage has continued to rise even as the overall number of sexual harassment complaints has declined. And last year, the percentage of lawsuits the EEOC filed on behalf of male victims hit an all-time high, making up 14 percent of all cases.

“It’s certainly possible that there’s more sexual harassment of men going on, but it could just be that more men are coming forward and complaining about it,” said Ernest Haffner, an attorney in the EEOC’s Office of Legal Counsel.

While some cases allege harassment by female supervisors or co-workers, most charges involve men harassing other men. Sometimes it’s unwelcome romantic advances. Other times, men are picked on because they are gay, perceived as being gay or not considered masculine enough for the work setting.

In the past, some employers might have shrugged off such antics as “boys will be boys” horseplay or fraternity-type behavior. But the EEOC has been filing more lawsuits involving male victims, saying it wants to send a message that such behavior is unacceptable and unlawful.

In November, for example, the Cheesecake Factory restaurant chain agreed to pay $345,000 to six male employees who claimed they were repeatedly sexually assaulted by a group of male kitchen staffers at a Phoenix-area restaurant.

The EEOC said the abusers would drag some victims kicking and screaming into a walk-in refrigerator, touching and grinding against the victims’ genitals and take turns simulating rape. The company denied the allegations but agreed to make a financial settlement and educate its employees and managers about sexual harassment.

Susan Strauss, a consultant who advises companies about how to avoid sexual harassment in the workplace, said she’s seeing more cases in which men are subject to a sexualized form of hazing.

“If you don’t fit the masculine stereotype or are viewed as effeminate, you get picked on in a sexual way to demean you,” Strauss said.

Cases involving women making unwanted advances toward men may also be rising as women make up a growing part of the work force. Last year, the Regal Entertainment Group, which operates a national chain of movie theaters, agreed to pay $175,000 to settle a lawsuit by a male employee who claimed a female co-worker repeatedly grabbed his crotch at work.

When the employee complained to his supervisor and the theater’s then-general manager, he claims, she failed to stop the harassment and instead retaliated against the victim with unfair discipline and lower performance evaluations.

The number of cases filed by men has grown steadily since a landmark Supreme Court ruling in 1998 held that same-sex harassment is a valid claim under federal anti-discrimination laws. That ruling involved an offshore oil rig worker who said he was subject to humiliating sex-related treatment by other workers, including being sodomized in the shower with a bar of soap.

In Pilkington’s case, he claims the restaurant’s chef would grope and pinch his genitals or grab his backside when Pilkington walked to the kitchen or stock room. Despite his complaints to the restaurant’s operating partner, he says the conduct didn’t stop.

After one incident, Pilkington lost his composure and yelled at the chef, making a scene. Days later, he was fired – an action he claims was retaliation for his complaints. An EEOC lawsuit on behalf of Pilkington and three other current and former employees is pending.

“I think maybe it’s just harder for males to come out and file a complaint because of how embarrassing it is,” Pilkington said. “When I talk about it I get this nauseous feeling in my stomach.”

The restaurant has denied the charges. In a statement, the company that owns Fleming’s said the restaurant “has always been committed to providing a safe and healthy workplace free of harassment for all of its associates.”

Many victims are hesitant to come forward because they are afraid of being considered unmanly or being derided by co-workers, said Mary Jo O’Neill, a regional attorney in the EEOC’s Phoenix District office.

“All sexual harassment victims feel humiliated, lacking control and power,” O’Neill said. “This has a different twist because everyone expects that they would be able to handle it and take care of it themselves.”

Pilkington has since moved on to another job. While he is embarrassed by the publicity his case has received, he says it was the right thing to do. The EEOC lawsuit seeks damages for him and other workers alleging harassment, along with back pay and compensatory and punitive damages.

La Press en Rose ©, 2009, The Wizard of 'OZ'

BIG BOX-MART

A little known fact…

The first testicular guard “Cup” was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.


That means it took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

*Thanks, Gary and Bright Eyes

Chicken Sandwiches

Don't eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what!


A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends. Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both broughtchicken sandwiches every day! This went on all through the fourth and fifth Grades, until one day he noticed thather sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich.

He said, 'Hey, how come you're not eatingchicken, don't you like it anymore?'

She said 'I love it but I have to stop eating it. '

' Why?' he asked.

She pointed to her lap and said 'Cause I'm starting to grow little feathers down there!'

'Let me see' he said. 'Okay' and she pulled up her skirt. He looked and said, 'That's right. You are! Better not eat any more chicken.'

He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut butter. He said to the little girl,

'I have to stop eating chicken sandwiches too, I'm also starting to get feathers down there!'

She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her!



She said...

'Oh, my Goodness, it's too late for you! You've already got the NECK and GIBLETS!!'

*Thanks, Daryn

A Long Sentence...

about 3:30 in the morning, a wife wakes up to find she is alone in the bed and she can hear her husband crying uncontrollably. She gets up and starts to look for him. He's not in the bathroom, living room, or in the kitchen.

As she passes the laundry room, she hears his faint sniffels coming from the basement. She turns on the light and goes downstairs to find him. Finally, she finds him huddled in the corner, rolled up into a ball, and crying hysterically.

She runs over to him and asks why he is crying. He says, "Do you remember when we got married twenty years ago?" She looks at him and says, "yes". He says, "well, a couple of months before, your dad said that I could marry you or go to jail." She says, "I already know that. I don't see what the problem is." He says, " don't you see!!! I would have gotten out today!"

Anchor Hocking Oven Ware (EXPLOSION)

I just wanted to advise you what happened to me last week.

I was shake and baking chicken in a piece of the above glass ware, it had been in the oven for approximately ¾ of an hour, when the glass dish (oven proof) exploded.

It shattered In many pieces from 3 inches to less than a millimeter, many were triangles.

Fortunately the oven door was closed and thus the shards were kept inside the oven, a couple of pieces entered the oven door, through the vents in the bottom of the door.

The explosion could have occurred, when someone was checking the progress of the baking or taking the finished dish out. This could have resulted in a face full or a chest full of glass with disastrous results.

I checked on the internet and there have been over 7000 incidents of Anchor Hocking Oven Ware exploding, this is not a high percentage as there were likely billions of units sold Pyrex also can break, but it generally breaks in large pieces, and does not explode.

I would ask that you check your glass oven ware and if it is Anchor Hocking to dispose of it by breaking as you don’t want it to be recycled. As I said we were very lucky that the explosion, took place in the closed oven so that the shards remained contained.

For more stories, click here.

*Thanks Dad

MAN KILLED ON GOLF COURSE. ANOTHER SEVERELY INJURED

A foursome of guys is waiting at the men's tee while a foursome of women is hitting from the ladies' tee. The ladies are taking their time. When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it 10 feet.. Then she goes over and whiffs it completely. Then she hacks it another ten feet and finally hacks it another five feet.


She looks up at the patiently waiting men and says apologetically, "I guess all those f--king lessons I took over the winter didn't help."


One of the men immediately responds, "Well, there you have it. You should have taken golf lessons instead!"


He never even had a chance to duck.

*Thanks, Gary

Failure

*Thanks, Bright Eyes

TROY - The Latest Strip

--Wizard's Note: I have updated all the TROY posts to reflect Michael Derry's new domain. Links are no longer broken--

This a gay-themed comic



Click Above Then choose 'Current Strip'.

The new comic, Troy #249 "Affirmations" is out in the magazines and up online today. They tried to make Troy to go rehab, he said, “No! No! NO!”


And you can find Michael's books and ebooks for sale at TROYTooner.

Voted Best Joke in Ireland

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!"

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night."

She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."

"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."

She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."

*Thanks, Bright Eyes!

What happens to kids who don't watch TV or play video games

This is what happens to young kids when they don't play video games or watch TV all day long......

*Thanks, Bright Eyes

Every Geek Should Know.........

If you consider yourself a geek, or aspire to the honor of geekhood, here’s an essential checklist of must-have geek skills.



The term ‘geek’, once used to label a circus freak, has morphed in meaning over the years. What was once an unusual profession transferred into a word indicating social awkwardness. As time has gone on, the word has yet again morphed to indicate a new type of individual: someone who is obsessive over one (or more) particular subjects, whether it be science, photography, electronics, computers, media, or any other field. A geek is one who isn’t satisfied knowing only the surface facts, but instead has a visceral desire to learn everything possible about a particular subject.

A techie geek is usually one who knows a little about everything, and is thus the person family and friends turn to whenever they have a question. If you’re that type of person and are looking for a few extra skills to pick up, or if you’re a newbie aiming to get a handhold on the honor that is geekhood, read on to find out what skills you need to know.

1. The Meaning of Technical Acronyms
• USB – Universal Serial Bus
• GPU – Graphics Processing Unit
• CPU – Central Processing Unit
• SATA – Serial ATA
• HTML – Hyper-text Markup Language
• HTTP – Hypertext Transfer Protocol
• FTP – File Transfer Protocol
• P2P – Peer-to-peer sharing (See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P2P)

2. How to Reset RAM
If you rolled your eyes here, that is a good thing. If not, you have many things to learn, young padawan. It’s amazing how few people know how to do this. If you’re unsure, hit up the link below to find out how:
http://www.yousaytoo.com
This tip is only really good for older machines running 9x based OS’s. However if you are running Windows Vista this can have a problem with RAM so here is how to create a desktop shortcut to free up RAM.
1. Right-click on your desktop and select New > Shortcut.
2. Copy/paste the following into the box: %windir%\system32\rundll32.exe advapi32.dll,ProcessIdleTasks
3. Click Next, name it ‘Clear Memory’, and click Finish.Give it asuitable icon so it looks nice.

3. Identify Keyloggers
Internet cafes are the most likely place you’ll find them, followed by library, perhaps, and maybe even you own house if you’ve some unscrupulous friends/family. Identity theft groups warn about keyloggers and advocate checking out the keyboard yourself before continuing. Can you identify a keylogger, however, if one is plugged into the back of the system?
Here’s what one looks like:
Hit up this link for excellent info on keyloggers on public computers and how to protect yourself:
http://www.ghacks.net

4. Surf the Web Anonymously
We won’t make any assumptions about why you may need this particular skill, but the fact remains that every geek should know how to traverse the Internet with the highest amount of security possible.
Aside from the safest method–which is using a connection that is not yours–you will need the ultimate in proxies…Tor. Tor is an onion-routing system which makes it ‘impossible’ for someone to find out who you actually are.

5. Bypass a Computer Password on All Major Operating Systems
Obviously you shouldn’t use this to gain unlawful access to a computer. If you’re a geek, however, you’ll eventually end up in a situation where someone forgets their password, you acquire a machine with an operating system you cannot access, or similar situation.
See this tutorial for info on how to bypass the password on the three major operating systems: Windows, Mac, and Linux.
http://www.joetech.com

6. Find a Users IP Address on AIM
Knowing someones IP address is actually pretty useless in this case, but most people don’t realize that. If someone is harassing you via AIM and you can’t get them to stop, discovering their IP and sending it to them–with a nicely worded threat of law enforcement involvement should they not stop–is likely enough to send them scamping away with tail between legs.
http://www.elitehackers.info

7. Hide a File Behind a JPEG
So you need a nice spot to hide your blackmail personal files. You could, of course, bury them deeply within a series of random, useless folders, but there’s always the chance of them being discovered. A password protected RAR is the best choice, but it’s a bit obvious despite the most boring title you could give it.
A sneaky person would hide the important file behind a completely random and boring family reunion photo, where no person in their right mind would shift through.
http://www.online-tech-tips.com

8. Crack a Wifi Password
This is one of those things you don’t need to do (hopefully), but that you still need to know just for the sake of knowledge. A strong WPA password is very secure, but most people don’t want to bother learning a convoluted series of letters, numbers, and symbols, instead opting for random everyday words.
A good overall tutorial on wifi and cracking can be found here: http://docs.lucidinteractive.ca

9. Monitor Network Traffic
The Internet is a vast place with a bit of everything. Whether you’re curious about what your roommate is downloading, your kid is getting into, or any leeches living around you who’ve unscrupulously breached your wifi, knowing how to analyze network traffic is an invaluable skill.
Here is a list of dozens of network analyzers, as well as some general info to get you started: http://www.slac.stanford.edu

10. Recover Master Boot Record
A virus or other problem can lead to an MBR error, which will make it impossible to access install. Many users would simply become frustrated and reinstall, but not you! Every geek should know how to recover the master book record.
Here is an excellent guide to get started: http://www.ntfs.com

11. Retrieve Data off Hard Drive
There will come some point in your life when a hard drive craps out sans warning. It could be due to a number of reasons–physical damage, file corruption, etc. There are computer service centers that would be happy to extract the data for a (hefty) fee; a true geek would be the one working at center, not taking his or her drive there.
To find out how to retrieve data off a damaged hard drive, read here: http://laptoplogic.com

12. Load Rockbox onto an MP3 Player
The firmware that comes on your average mp3 player is intended for those who are scared of advanced features; often, the only audio settings available are a few prearranged EQs. If you’re an audiophile–or simply frustrated with the lack of control over your music settings–Rockbox is the firmware for you. Open source and free, it can be installed on several different types of players and enables full control over what you listen to.
http://rockbox.org

13. Unbrick a Smartphone
No geek can resist the allure of flashing the newest beta firmware onto their shiny smartphone. The byproduct of that is sometimes a bricked phone, which would leave many sobbing into their pillow at night. To avoid rendering your $400 gadget into a door stopper, learn the fine art of unbricking and then flash away.
As the method used to fix a phone will vary, this is the best place to start looking for answers: http://www.howardforums.com/

14. Replace a Laptop Keyboard
Keyboards get gummy after awhile. If you use yours a lot (aka: all day), then you probably eat over it at some point. Crumbs get into the keys and things are sticking, and before you know it, you need a new keyboard.
http://www.refurbished-laptop-guide.com

15. Rip Streaming Videos
Streaming videos are officially in vogue. We’re not going to make any assumptions about what type of videos you are streaming and may want to keep, but no matter what it is, any geek could rip them while sipping a Red Bull and watching the latest episode of BSG.
Here’s a hint to get you started: http://applian.com/download-videos
or try this one http://www.downloadyoutubevideos.com

16. Strip Windows DRM
DRM is incredibly annoying. With many online stores now offering DRM-free mp3 audio files, it would seem it’s not as big of an issue as it used to be. That is not not the case, however, with all videos bearing a DRM as well as music of a higher-quality than MP3.
Stripping Windows DRM is not legal. If you’re a geek, your probably don’t care: http://undrm.info

17. Homebrew Hack Game Systems
Gaming consoles are notorious for having features you can’t use simply because the manufacturer decided to lock them down. As a geek, you can’t just be satisfied with the features they decided to give you. No, you have to crack that case open and take a peek inside. Every geek should know how to homebrew hack their system and unlock it’s full potential.

18. Find a Website IP Address Without Web/Command Prompt Access
Some school admins think they’re being sneaky when they lock down the command prompt and block all major IP search websites and block all the websites you actually want to visit. Of course, that is child’s play for any geek.
First, to get a new command prompt, open Notepad and type: command.com. Then, save as “cmd.bat”. You now have a command prompt.
Now, open the command prompt and type “ping http://www.website.com/” to find the IP address of that website.
Enter the website into the browser and you will officially have impressed all your friends.

19. Bypass School or Work Website Blocks
What is a horrific situation for an average computer user is a simple irritation for an everyday geek. To bypass a website block/filter, simply enter that websites IP address in instead of the actual site address.

20. Screw with Wifi Leeches
Nobody likes a wifi leech. At best, they’re simply using up your valuable bandwidth. At the worst–and far more likely, they’re stealing your identity and watching your activities. After watching your network and identifying the leech, use this trick to flip their browser upside down and let them know you don’t appreciate the intrusion.
http://tech.nocr.at

21. Hexadecimal and Binary Number Systems
Everyone knows the normal, everyday digit system used. It takes a special–possibly psychotic person–to also know hexadecimal and binary number systems.
Here is an excellent interactive tutorial on learning the two systems: http://www.wisc-online.com

22. How to Hot Wire a Car
If your family always turns to you any time their computer hiccups, their DVD player needs fixed, or their home security system doesn’t activate, it’s only a matter of time before someone asks you how to hot wire a car. Wouldn’t it be great to be able to answer them?
To learn this unique skill, read here: http://howto.wired.com

23. Increase Wifi Range
With so many small portable gadgets gaining more and more sophisticated web browsers, in addition to gaming systems like the PSP and DS, getting the most use out of your wifi is practically a geek necessity.
Here is a good guide on extending your wifi’s range:
http://www.mavromatic.com

24. Carrying a Computer Cleaning Arsenal on Your USB Drive
A good geek prepares for their friends stupidity. No matter how many times you tell them to stop downloading porn, they keep doing it until their machine is so infected it can’t drag itself into a grave. An arsenal of portable malware cleaners, a portable task manager, anti-virus, etc, will make those impromptu purging sessions all the easier.

25. Running an Operating System from a USB Thumb Drive
Most people don’t even understand what the magical operating system is. As a geek, you should transcend that basic knowledge and have a small operating system on your thumb drive handy for those times you need computer access but don’t know the password to a nearby computer.
http://www.pendrivelinux.com/

26. Understand What “There’s no Place Like 127.0.0.1″ Means
A lot of geeks wear this shirt as a short hand code for their computer finesse–or maybe just to screw with other people who stare but cannot figure out what it means. No matter the reason, if you’d like an answer, check out the link below.
http://www.tech-faq.com/127.0.0.1.shtml

27. Read 1337 At Normal Speed
Sure, everyone knows about it and it’s no longer cool, but if you’re going to proclaim yourself as a geek, you should be able to read it full speed. Who wants to choke in front of the wannabe that learned to read it full speed and flaunts it in your face?
http://www.wikihow.com/Read-and-Write-in-1337

28. At Least One Fictional Language
And not only should you know a fictional language, but you should use it to say something about yourself. Do you choose Klingon or Quenya?
Here’s a list of constructed languages: http://en.wikipedia.org

29. How to Survive in a Linux Argument
Linux is gaining an all around higher standing in the geeksphere, and it’s bound to enter a conversation at some point (which will invariably end up turning into an argument). If you want to keep up, you’ll need to understand the basic points of Linux, as well as the general info of all basic things.
Here’s a good place to read and gain a foothold: http://www.linux.com

30. Identify Major Constellations
For those times you venture from the air-conditioned, computer filled basement of your parents house (or something like that), look up at the stars and have yourself a Galileo moment. The stars may just be dots to many people, but with the handy website below, you’ll be stopping man-belts and lions in no time.
http://www.sky-watch.com

31. Use a Camera in Manual Mode
Sure, you could just use auto mode like everyone else too afraid to learn what some letters and numbers mean, but then you wouldn’t be much of a geek, would you? The oft-ignored dial on a camera is the key that unleashes the best quality photos possible, and every geek should be a whiz at using one.
http://digital-photography-school.com

32. Who Mulder and Scully Are
It seems that in the plethora of geek websites, there always appears a joke about Mulder and Scully, the two main characters from the X-Files. If you don’t know who they are, you’ll be left in the dark, alone, contemplating what exactly it was you were doing in the 90’s that you wouldn’t understand the joke.
http://en.wikipedia.org

33. Javascript
HTML is running the world (not really). Everyone knows some HTML and it makes them feel empowered. As a geek, you want to transcend that basic knowledge others share and know a little more. JavaScript is the answer–it is easy to learn if you’re not actually interested in web programming, but simply curious, and it looks scary to anyone who doesn’t know it.
http://www.yourhtmlsource.com

34. How to Unlock an iPhone
Sure, most geeks wouldn’t be caught dead with an iPhone, but what about your friends? You’re the smart techie, they’ll expect your to know how to unlock it.
http://www.pcworld.com

35. How to Install Mac OS X on a PC
Just because you don’t want Mac on your PC doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know how to do it. Knowledge is power, right? Go ahead, use this to stump your friends and family.
http://dailyapps.net

36. Build a PC
If you purchase a ready-made PC, you can be sure of one thing–you’re paying more than you should. Assembling your own PC isn’t too hard, and is the first thing you should be aiming to accomplish as a geek.
Here is a massive article on assembling your own PC:
http://www.pcmech.com

37. Tethering a Smartphone
Nothing like a little wifi on the move, eh? Tethering a smartphone means using the Internet on your laptop/netbook via your cell phone. Of course, the method to do this depends on your phone, but here’s an article to get your started:
http://www.tech-recipes.com

38. Wiring a Home Theater System
Home theater systems used to consist of a TV and a chair. Gone are those days of simplicity, however, and setting up a modern system can be pure mind-boggling horror. Where does the modulator go, why does the DVD player have no video and the cable box no sound?
Here’s a tutorial, including excellent diagrams, to show you how: http://www.prillaman.net

39. Replacing a Laptop LCD
Laptop LCDs are vulnerable to many different mishaps: accidental pressure spots, shadows, airsoft pellets…. No matter, there will come a point when you need to swap your LCD for a new one. Now, as a geek, you probably don’t have an extended warranty. If that’s the case, here are some excellent pages and pictures on replacing the display:
http://www.fonerbooks.com/laptop_4.htm

40. Make a Laptop Cooling Pad
Can you believe these cost $50?! A geek will need one, because data crunching/DVD ripping/videos playing/rendering at the same times tends to cause excess heat. Instead of shelling out your hard earned dollars, make your own like so: http://www.instructables.com

41. Unleash a Laser Pointer’s full potential
A normal person uses a laser pointer to drive their dog crazy. A geek uses it to melt butter for their grilled cheese sandwich. To unless a laser pointer’s full strength, crack open the case, fry the resistor with a hot soldering iron, then snap it back together and keep it away from flesh/eyes/airplanes. The pointer will burn out after a few hours, but what a fun few hours they will be.
Note: this is dangerous. Don’t do anything stupid.

42. Keyboard Shortcuts
This will depend on your operating system and the apps you use, so there’s no tutorial available. However, that is irrelevant–you’re a geek, you can find them yourself. Shortcuts are the difference between a slow computer user and a geek. The geek will always will out in a speed contest, because they do practically everything from their keyboard.

43. Soldering Glasses Together
Nerds use tape on broken glasses; geeks use solder. ‘Nuff said.

44. How to Execute a Shell Script
If you’re a true geek, you’ll need to do this at some point. Below are instructions on how to do so. Remember: always be cautious when running a script, you don’t want your computer to turn into a door stop, now do ya?
http://www.mcsr.olemiss.edu

45. How to Hack a Pop Machine
Okay, so stealing isn’t cool. Still, hacking is simply a misunderstood art, right? So hacking a pop machine isn’t really stealing, because it’s not about the pop, it about the pleasure of getting your way. Or something like that. (Newsflash, it is illegal, don’t do it.) If you want to try your fingers at getting a free Coke, check out this link:
http://skattertech.com

46. Turn a Laptop into a Digital Picture Frame
So you want to show off pictures of your dog and that girl you once met, but you want to do it in an uber geeky way. Any schmuck can go to Walmart and buy a digital picture frame for a grossly inflated price. But you…oh, you’re too smart for that. No, instead you’ll find an old laptop on eBay for $5 and turn it into a true work of art.
http://repair4laptop.org

47. How to Mod a Flash Drive Case
All the geeks are doing it…. Whatever. The case your flash drive came in is probably weak and most certainly plain. Why not jazz it up with your own unique style?
Here’s one such case mod, and dozens of related projects:
http://www.instructables.com.

48. Do Cool Things to Altoids Tins
People are obsessed with these things. Altoids tins are durable, small, and just begging to be filled with LEDs, mp3 players, audio amps, and maybe some snuff. A good geek will find millions of uses for these little metal wonders. If you need a mental boost, however, here’s some interesting links:
http://www.squidoo.com/altoids-tins

49. Convert Cassette Tapes to Digital Audio Files
If your geekhood started in the 90’s, then you probably have a least a few (dozen) cassette tapes still sitting around. Why not breathe digital life into them before they fall ill to mortal fate?
http://lifehacker.com

50. Lock Your Computer with a USB Drive
You don’t want anyone getting into your files while you’re gone. A normal password would be enough to keep most people out, but what if you got super-secret X files on your computer? You can lock your machine down with a USB drive via these instructions:
http://lionjkt.wordpress.com

51. Run Your Own Ethernet Line
Wifi has taken the place of a wired connection in many homes, and with good reasons–you can go anywhere, no cables necessary. What about those…sensitive…activities that you’d rather the neighborhood script kiddie didn’t see on your wifi? An Ethernet cable is your solution.
To wire your own Ethernet, hit up this link: http://www.ertyu.org

52. Set Up a Streaming Media Server
With digital files becoming the ultimate medium, many people have hundreds of gigabytes worth of music, videos, and pictures. You could keep them on a portable hard drive, but then you’re have to take it everywhere, and only one person could use it at a time. The solution is a streaming media server, something no geek can live without.
http://www.n00tz.net

53. Setting up a VPN
If you’re like most geeks, you can’t live without your computers. They store your life in some poetic fashion, holding files you feel a personal connection with…. Anyway, if you are at work and suddenly realize you left an important picture at home (or you need blackmail material pronto), having a VPN ready to go will save you big time.
http://www.computernetworkinghelp.com

54. Turn Webcams into Security Cameras
Is someone stealing your Netflix DVDs? Do you suspect it is a fat hairy man in his boxers taking them each morning? If so, you can get your proof using a couple webcams and a bit of software.
http://www.simplehelp.net

55. Control Your House Lights with a Computer
Controlling the lights in your house via computer is a great way to freak out the neighborhood kids ding-dong-ditching (assuming you wire up a Halloween scream motion sensor, also). If you reasons are less nefarious, you simply use it to turn on and off lights without having to life ye butt from thy seat, which is a good reason in itself.
http://www.instructables.com

56. Play Retro Games without Retro Consoles
This applies to the geeks who enjoy gaming. Setting up an emulation PC on your TV is a great way to relive those games of old.

57. Put LEDs Inside a Lightbulb
The days of hot incandescent and mercury-laden fluorescent are gone, and in are the days of long lasting, low heat, low consumption LEDs. As any good geek, you want to be able to say “I was doing X long before it became mainstream.” Here’s your chance–the following link will show you how to put an LED inside a lightbulb, something sure to stump your friends the same way Grandpa’s ship-in-a-wine-bottle used to stump you.
http://blog.makezine.com

58. Create Music with Keyboard
How awesome is KeyBored? This little app gives all of your QWERTY keys a piano note. When you type, it sounds like an infant monkey punching a keyboard. If you’ve got some musical chops, it won’t take you long to figure out the Star Wars theme or find a hidden musical message in Counter Strike control buttons.
http://thebatman.net/keybored/

59. Make Your Office Ergonomic
Face it–you spend a lot of time at your desk. You might even have a few extra pounds and pallid skin to show for it. While those things are temporary, far to common and more serious is the carpal tunnel, eye strain, and back problems you’ll develop from having a poor workspace.
Hit up this link to create a body-friendly workspace that will keep you limber and flexible: http://www.ergotron.com

60. Adding a Third Monitor
Studies show that dual monitor increase work productivity by 30%. As a geek, you’ll need a third monitor to equal the dual setup of a layman (if that makes sense). While any hack with a VGA port can add a second monitor, it takes a true geek to add a third (or more). This will vary based on graphics/OS, so hit up Google for a tutorial or two.

61. How to Convert a DVD to x264 (or XviD or DivX)
It might seem like child’s play to you, but many individuals do not understand the fine art of converting a DVD into a digital file, let alone the careful skills it takes to achieve a happy balance between size and quality.
Here is an excellent tutorial demonstrating how to rip a DVD with the multi-platform free software Handbrake: http://howto.diveintomark.org

62. Flash System BIOS
Ya gotta do it some time, so stop putting it off and man up. Flashing the BIOS on your laptop might seem scary (as it should–fear keeps you on your toes and prevents mistakes), but it’s not (actually, it is, but if you even understand why you need to do this, you’ve gotta have at least a few chops by now). Warning–you can seriously bork your computer doing this!
http://www.pcstats.com

63. How to Irrecoverably Protect Data
TrueCrypt, my friends. Learn to use TrueCrypt. If you have ask why, you don’t need it.

64. The Fastest way to Kill a Computer
It’s said that you have to get into a killers mind to understand their weaknesses, right? Same goes for the unfortunate boobs who always kill their laptops. Here’s a list of all the different ways you can accidentally kill a computer–arm your family and friends, and save yourself grief (because it’s surely you they will call when something goes horribly, horribly wrong).
http://www.pcstats.com

This post was originally posted by editor Blair Mathis,
http://laptoplogic.com

*Thanks, Erwin

The Lighter Side of Computer Repair...

Caller: Hello, our printer is not working.
Customer Service: What is wrong with it?
Caller: Mouse is jammed.
Customer Service: Mouse is jammed? Printers don't have a mouse!
Caller: Mmmmm??.. Oh really?... I will send a picture.

*Thanks, Theresa

The 411 - The "Toonie"

Toonie (sometimes spelled twoonie or twonie) is the name of the two-dollar coin, a combination of the number "two" with the name of the loonie, Canada's one-dollar coin. In Canadian French it is sometimes known as a polar, to rhyme with huard, for loonie.

Introduced on February 19, 1996, the toonie is a bi-metallic coin which bears an image of a polar bear, by Campbellford, Ontario artist Brent Townsend, on the reverse. The obverse, like all other current Canadian coins, has a portrait of Queen Elizabeth II. It is the only coin in Canada to have the "ELIZABETH II / D.G. REGINA" in a different typeface; it is also the only coin to consistently bear its issue date on the obverse.

When the coin was introduced a number of nicknames were suggested. Some of the early ones included bearly, the deuce and the doubloonie (a play on "double loonie" and the former Spanish doubloon coin). A joke refers to the coin as "The Queen with the Bear Behind", and thus the moonie. Another joke poked fun at the then-weak Canadian dollar to American dollar exchange rate by suggesting that the coin be called "the American silver dollar"[citation needed]. Finally, the coin has been referred to as the Bouchard[citation needed] (after Quebec separatist leader Lucien Bouchard), due to a few reports of the inside disc of the coin separating from the outside in early coins.

Another angle to the name pairs the word "toonie" up with the "loonie" (one dollar coin) to complete the reference to "loonie toonie" or the famous and popular Looney Tunes cartoons; an indirect jibe at Canadian politicians who introduced the coins replacing the paper currency equivalents.

The name "toonie" became so widely accepted that in 2006 the Royal Canadian Mint secured the rights to it. A competition to name the bear resulted in the name "Churchill", a reference to the common polar bear spottings in Churchill, Manitoba.

Many toonies in the first shipment of the coins were considered defective, because they could separate if struck hard or frozen, as the centre piece would shrink more than the outside. This problem quickly garnered media attention and eventually was believed to have been corrected, and the initial wave of so-called toonie popping blew over a few months after the coin's introduction. Although the public appears to believe the toonies were "corrected," the coins can still be separated if struck hard or frozen. Such a "separated coin" may still be redeemed at a bank for its face value; however, Canada's Currency Act explicitly prohibits the deliberate "break up" of "any coin"

Interesting factoid: Here you see a "Mul-Loonie - a limited edition pin made by the Manitoba NDP to protest Prime Minister Brian Mulroney's introduction of the GST Bill into the House.

*From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The Difference Between Men and Women

Let's say a guy named Fred is attracted to a woman named Martha. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Martha, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?"

And then, there is silence in the car.

To Martha, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.

And Fred is thinking: Gosh. Six months.

And Martha is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily towards, I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?

And Fred is thinking: ...so that means it was...let's see...February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means...lemme check the odometer...Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.

And Martha is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed - even before I sensed it - that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.

And Fred is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.

And Martha is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.

And Fred is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty...scumballs.

And Martha is thinking: Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.

And Fred is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up their...

"Fred," Martha says aloud.

"What?" says Fred, startled.

"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have...oh dear, I feel so..."(She breaks down, sobbing.)

"What?" says Fred.

"I'm such a fool," Martha sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse."

"There's no horse?" says Fred.

"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Martha says.

"No!" says Fred, glad to finally know the correct answer.

"It's just that...it's that I...I need some time," Martha says. (There is a 15- second pause while Fred, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)

"Yes," he says. (Martha, deeply moved, touches his hand.)

"Oh, Fred, do you really feel that way?" she says.

"What way?" says Fred.

"That way about time," says Martha.

"Oh," says Fred. "Yes." (Martha turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)

"Thank you, Fred," she says.

"Thank you," says Fred.

Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Fred gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a college basketball game between two South Dakota junior colleges that he has never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it.

The next day Martha will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification.

They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it either.

Meanwhile, Fred, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Martha's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did Martha ever own a horse?"

And that's the difference between men and women.

Now here is why men die before women:

Best Animated Comedy Short Ever

The Olde English sketch comedy team put together this animated short about a blind date between two irrational numbers. It's wonderful. Enjoy! Click below to open it. It is a movie:

And Now A Word From Krusty...

Presidential Reunion

The ol' Desktop Icon Switcheroo

In Microsoft Windows, if you press the 'Print Scrn' key on your keyboard during any application it will take an image of whatever is on screen and place it onto your clipboard. From there, you can paste it into whatever application you wish...

So here goes. When your co-worker is distracted shut down any applications they have running on their computer and capture an image of the desktop, with all of it's icons, using the Print Scrn key. Open paintbrush and click Edit-->Paste to paste the image into Paintbrush. Save the image as a bitmap, and return to their desktop. Right-click the desktop and set the Desktop wallpaper to the image you just saved. If you wanna get real mean... delete all of their desktop icons (Might get you in trouble with IT).... The icons will still appear to be there, but since they're only part of the image and not really icons none of them will work. Endless hours of fun as they try to figure out what happened.

Bonus points for pulling this trick on a compter saavy person. No-one ever figures out whats going on with their computer.

* I did this where I used to work...I sat back and laughed my ass off, the other technician came over and he got so pissed he unplugged it!

Plushenko (Sex Bomb)

*Thanks, Erwin

SO YOU THINK YOU HAVE SEEN EVERYTHING!

The 4th picture down is the condos built in Montreal for 1976 Olymics

Would you believe...