Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?
They went to see "Closed for the Winter."
Why did the blonde resolve to have only 3 children?
She heard that one out of every four children born in the world was Chinese
Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall?
There was a power outage, and two blondes were stuck on the escalators for over four hours.
A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad
hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it
to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he
decided to have some fun.
He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started
blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little
harder, and still nothing happened.
Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow
into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Uh, like hello! You need to roll up the windows first."
A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The
doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while
covering the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was
which that the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag with a
hole to see through, covered up the appropriate eye, and asked her to
read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears
streaming down her face.
"Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to get emotional about getting
glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "But I kind of had my heart set
on wire frames.
A blonde was shopping at a Target Store and came across a silver
thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought
it over to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "That's a
thermos . . . it keeps some things hot and some things cold"
"Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing. I'm going to buy it!" So she
bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on
her desk.
"What do you have there?" he asked.
"Why, that's a thermos . .. . it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied.
Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"
The blond replied, "Two Popsicles, and some coffee,"
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls,
and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde. The puzzled
blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.
Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls."
Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and
finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked,
"Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"
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