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Sunday, March 28, 2004

Cool Site 'O The Day

I can't remember meeting anyone who did not like to pop those little bubbles in bubble wrap. Now you can squish away to your heart's content by clicking here.

Saturday, March 27, 2004

Everything's BIG in Texas!

Man, That's one FAT gopher!

Straight story


Single girl tests her eye for queer guys on Fox series
By KEVIN WILLIAMSON -- Calgary Sun

What's easier to spot than a homosexual? A crappy new reality-TV show.

(The Wizard agrees and gives it a thumbs down, or am I the only one that thinks that this is bad news, I mean, prentending to be in the closet for $1M, seems downright bad thing to do. Why would any self respecting homosexual want to capitalize on the whole coming out process... I just dunno! Oh, and just so's ya know, I resent the first line that Mr. Williamson wrote. He is guilty of stereotyping homosexuals. I bet he can't tell a fag from a str8 guy..not all of us wear leather, walk and talk effeminitely!)

That's apparently the message to be gleaned from Playing It Straight, yet another in the numbing, endless viral strain of Bachelor/Bachelorette knockoffs that have beset television viewers like so many several thousand Biblical locusts (or maybe it only feels like several thousand) in recent weeks. The depressing, inevitable network pitch probably went something like: "It's Average Joe meets Queer Eye for the Straight Guy!"

From the fine folks at Fox, Playing It Straight -- appearing for the first time, sort of like a rash, tomorrow -- takes a single gal and makes her try to figure out which of her suitors are heterosexual and which ones are just "playing it straight."

If she hooks up with a straight would-be beau, she gets a $1-million prize.

If she gives her love to one of the gay competitors, he gets the money. Let the sexually-ambiguous hilarity ensue.

Or you could read a book and enrich your life. Or you could just wait for The Littlest Groom 2. (Oh, come on -- admit it, you are.) So little time, so many demanding choices.

Speaking of demands, while some reality-TV series (Fear Factor, for one inane example) demand physical prowess or mental agility (um, still waiting for that reality-TV show), the chief attribute required of Jackie Thomas, a waitress from small-town U.S.A. (in this case, Appleton, Wis.), is "gaydar."

Thomas, on the phone to the Sun yesterday, admits her gaydar -- the ability to distinguish sexual orientations on instinct alone -- proved somewhat lacking.

"For me, I'm a very gullable person and everyone was telling me they're straight.

"I don't have very good gaydar. The guys were surprising me all the time ... It was kind of interesting, the final question is always 'Are you gay or are you straight?' and I was very shocked with some of the guys."

Of course, if she wasn't, there wouldn't be much point to the show. Playing It Straight's producers, naturally, want their leading lady baffled when faced with straight guys who act gay (ordering drinks with umbrellas) and gay men who act straight (playing football). If she could spot one as easily as picking out a toupee in the crowd, there'd be no tension, no surprise and no Playing It Straight 2, 3 and 4 if the network has its way.

Of course, one of the pleasures -- if you find the humiliation of others pleasurable -- of this kind of show is watching faces drop and tantrums explode as the producers nastily yank the rug out from under their unwitting and witless participants.

(Average Joe: Hawaii's Larissa Meek, for example, threw a spectacular hissy-fit when she discovered why the show she was on was called "Average Joe" and not "Sensationally Handsome and Charming Joe.")

Thomas, however, says she never felt duped or manipulated -- even though at first she didn't know about the gay/straight premise.

"There were no ambushes," she says, summing up her time on the series, which filmed last summer, as "a fun experience" despite the requisite twists and turns.

"We had a wonderful time ... What I gained from it is that you can't believe in stereotypes. They don't exist," says Thomas, who is currently contemplating a career in acting.

And today's reality is, she notes, that gay culture has emerged from the closet and into the mainstream -- whether its the flavour-of-the-month Queer Eye or the long-running Will & Grace.

"I think it's fantastic that people are talking about it because it used to be that they didn't."

It also, she feels, elevates her entry into the genre from others of its ilk (you know who they are). "(Those) are about love and money, but this adds a whole other aspect."

*Note from The Wizard: I think I'll just stay watching Will & Grace.
Will & Grace
Click above for the Will & Grace site on NBC.

Thursday, March 25, 2004

A Saskatchewan Taste Treat!

We grow 'em BIG here in Saskabush!

Chocolate Covered Grasshoppers

Ingredients:
baker's chocolate
candied crickets

Directions:
Melt baker's chocolate in double boiler.
Fill molds halfway with chocolate, add grasshoppers, fill rest of the way.

A tasty surprise in every one!

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

I.Q. Test

Now don't cheat. After you do the test... THEN click for the answers.
Bonus points if you don't use a pen on yer screen!


Click here for the answers.

100 Bonus points if you did not use a pen to write the answers on your monitor screen!

Inner Peace


Haha!

I'm passing this on to you because it has definitely worked for me... and at this time of year we all could use a little... calm! By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace...

The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've started." So I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished... and before coming to work this morning I finished off a bottle of whiskey, a half case of beer, the Bailey's, my Tylenol 3's, some cigarettes and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freakin' good I feel! You may pass this on to those you feel are in need of Inner Peace.


*Thanks, Vlad!

Monday, March 22, 2004

The Wizard is back in 'OZ'!




Hello fellow readers! Yes it's true! The Wonderful Wizard of 'OZ' is back in the Emerald city! Stay tuned for a trip up the Yellow Brick Road!
The Wonderful Wizard of 'OZ'