*Photo credit: © Benjamin News Company, Montreal
Welcome to 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow!! Posting is at 10AM, Noon and 2PM CST daily. Up to 12 days of posts on the main page. The archives have more. You can forward posts by clicking on the envelope at the bottom of the post. Enjoy your stay! *** If you need to contact me, or have a copyright issue, please use the "Contact The Wizard" form on the left side of 'OZ'. Original source and author is cited and credited in each post where possible. ***
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Thursday, March 31, 2022
Habitat 67
Share and W-I-N!!
Yes, that's right... The Wizard of 'OZ' is having a
"SHARE and WIN" contest!
The Pecker
Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods.
A small tree begins to grow between them.
The beech says to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"
The birch says he cannot tell. Just then a woodpecker lands in the sapling.
The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"
The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree.
He replies, "It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. That, my friends, is the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in."
Wednesday, March 30, 2022
R.I.P. Paul Herman (1946 - 2022)
Paul Herman, the character actor best known for his role as club owner Peter “Beansie” Gaeta in “The Sopranos,” died Tuesday. His “Sopranos” co-star Michael Imperioli confirmed the news in an Instagram. He was 76. A cause of death has not been announced.
MATCHSTICK CHALLENGE A TITANIC TASK
It took a year and more than four million matches, but Mark Colling has nearly finished his nineteen foot model of the Titanic. It could win him a place in the Guinness Book of Records.
Talking about his achievement Mark Colling said, "I am four million, three hundred thousand matches in at the moment. With the iceberg, the boat and the sea it will be twenty-four foot long, six foot wide and six foot high."
Mark estimates he’ll use over thirty-six litres of glue and have to fork out four thousand pounds in costs to complete the project.
Black Testicles
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult, four-hour surgical procedure. A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
Tuesday, March 29, 2022
Doggy Dictionary
DOG BED: any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.
DROOL: Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To do this properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad and let the drool fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.
SNIFF: A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place your nose as close as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhale deeply, repeat several times, or until your person makes you stop.
GARBAGE CAN: A container which your neighbors put out once a week to test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right you are rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.
BICYCLES: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards; the person then swerves and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.
DEAFNESS: This is a malady which affects dogs when their person want them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.
THUNDER: This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling your eyes wildly, and following at their heels.
WASTEBASKET: This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old candy wrapper. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house until your person comes home
SOFAS: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean.
BATH: This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.
LEAN: Every good dogs's response to the command "sit !", especially if your person is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective before black-tie events.
BUMP: The best way to get your human's attention when they are drinking a fresh cup of coffee or tea.
GOOSE BUMP: A maneuver to use as a last resort when the Regular Bump doesn't get the attention you require.....especially effective when combined with The Sniff. See above.
LOVE: Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and without restriction. The best way you can show your love is to wag your tail. If you're lucky, as I am your human will love you in return.
By Madam Shiht zhu, Professor of Doglish, Dog University
Cliff Notes
"It's a little known fact that cows were domesticated in Mesopotamia and were also used in China as guard animals for the forbidden city."
"It's a little known fact that smartest animal is a pig. Scientists say if pigs had thumbs and a language, they could be trained to do simple manual labor. They give you 20-30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner you can eat them."
"I wonder if you know that the harp is a predecessor of the modern day guitar. Early minstrels were much larger people. In fact, they had hands the size of small dogs."
"If memory serves, the umbilical chord is 90% postassium."
"It's a little known fact that the tan became popular in what is known as the Bronze Age."
"If you were to go back in history and take every president, you'll find that the numerical value of each letter in their name was equally divisible into the year in which they were elected. By my calculations, our next president has to be named Yellnick McWawa."
"There's no rule against postal workers not dating women. It just works out that way."
"They did a study between postal workers and chimpanzees. They proved chimps were 32% slower. Of course, they were better with public relations."
Monday, March 28, 2022
Bill's Car Wash
Bill owns a company that manufactures and installs car wash systems. Bill's company installed a car wash system in Frederick, Md.
The problem started when the new owner complained to Bill that he was losing significant amounts of money from his coin machines each week. He went as far as to accuse Bill's employees of having a key to the boxes and ripping him off.
Bill just couldn't believe that his people would do that, so they setup a camera to catch the thief in action. Well, they did catch him on film!
That's a bird sitting on the change slot of the machine. The bird had to go down into the machine, and back up inside to get to the money! That's three quarters he has in his beak!
Another amazing thing is that it was not just one bird -- there were several working together. Once they identified the thieves, they found over $4000 in quarters on the roof of the car wash and more under a nearby tree. And you thought you heard of everything by now!!! And to think the phrase "bird brain" is associated with being dumb. Not these birds!
I Believe
I believe- that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I believe- that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I believe- that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe- that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe- that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I believe- that you can keep going long after you can't.
I believe- that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe- that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe- that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I believe- that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I believe- that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe- that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I believe- that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
I believe- that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe- that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I believe- that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe- that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I believe- that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world do! esn't stop for your grief.
I believe- that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I believe- that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I believe- that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe- that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I believe- that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe- that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I believe- that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I believe- that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
I believe- that when we look for the good in others, we discover the best in ourselves.
4 Catholic Mothers
Four catholic mothers sit together over a cup of coffee and try to impress each other with the importance of their sons.
Sunday, March 27, 2022
Two travelling angels
Screenshot from newest Ubuntu 22.04 - Jammy Jellyfish
I am such a geek. Good thing I have a personality! Here is a screenshot of the next release of Ubuntu. It is being released in April. It's code name is "Jammy Jellyfish". I think it looks beautiful as far as operating systems go. What do you think? The Wizard has been using Ubuntu Linux for over 10 years. Yes, haven't used Windows (except for work) since then!
Saturday, March 26, 2022
Irish Prostitute
An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years.
Upon her return, her father cussed her. "Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?"
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a prostitute...."
Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a £5,000 savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club....(takes a breath)....and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and ... ."
Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says Dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a prostitute dad! Sniff, sniff."
Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant!! Come here and give yer old man a hug!"
Wing Chun Nuns
Description: Wing Chun is arguably the most famous single style within the Shaolin system. It was made known to the west by Bruce Lee and James Lee in the late 1960s in what was the single most influential introduction of Chinese Kung Fu outside China (one might equate Bruce Lee's bringing of kung fu to American television in 1964 with the arrival of the Beatles in America two years earlier). Despite Lee's rapid evolution of a personal style away from traditional Wing Chun, his association with that style was a major factor in its continued success over the years. More recently, the style has received new publicity following the death of long time grandmaster Yip Man as at least three of his senior disciples have waged an acrimonious conflict over who would inherit the supreme mantle for the style.
History: About two hundred years ago, there lived in China a beautiful young woman whose name was Yim Wing Chun. Her name suited her admirably, since it meant "Beautiful Springtime." She was the daughter of a food merchant, who sold beancurd from a marketstand. She was betrothed to the man she loved, Leong Bok Chao. Her father, however, could not resist boasting of her beauty and gentle character.
One day, news of this beautiful maiden came to the ears of an infamous warlord of the Yunan province. He journeyed to her town, and upon seeing her, was immediately struck with a consuming desire to possess her, and, as often the way with rogues, decided to get his way by force. He ordered Wing Chun's father to his camp and told him that unless the maiden was given to him in marriage, he would kill them both. The father, his heart full of fear and confusion, and horrified at the warlord's cruel tactics, left the warlord's encampment to return home to tell his lovely daughter of her fate. There seemed to be no alternative, since the rogue was well known for his brutal atrocities and powerful gang of bandits. Calling young Wing Chun to him, the father told her of the warlord's ultimatum.
"Your name will be honored in our family and you will be esteemed as a revered ancestor", he said, struggling for words to make the idea more palatable. "Who knows, you may be able to soften the warlord's heart and maintain yourself with pride as his wife, if not with the love I know you have for Leong Bok Chao. Ng Mui was a Shaolin nun, who had lived for many years in the great southern temple of Fukien. Some years earlier, this refuge of the contemplative life had been destroyed during a rebellion against the Manchu dynasty. Ng Mui was one of the few that had escaped the holocaust. She was an adept of the Shaolin fighting arts of dragon and crane. These arts had been developed to allow the priests and nuns to protect themselves from wild animals and wilder men, who would seek to destroy the peaceful way of the Shaolin order. When Ng Mui heard of the dilemma that Wing Chun found herself in, the nun sat quietly in meditation, thinking of a way which, in accord with Shaolin principles, would cause the least pain and hurt to all.
Wing Chun Martial Approach: There are two concepts that are essential to Wing Chun: centerline and simplicity. The centerline is guarded meticulously with hands on center and elbows down and in. Movement is small and extremely efficient, utilizing subtle shifts of the body to deflect, evade and counterstrike all in one motion. At its most advanced level, contact with the opponent is maintained at all times to constantly check arms and legs, trap, and utilize the opponent’s movement to guide and even to increase power. Once the first blow is struck, the Wing Chun practitioner will march an opponent back with a constant barrage of swift, low kicks to disrupt the stance, and a flurry of cycle punches that serve as both offense and defense, batting everything off center and continuing in for the strike. Because of its simplicity, Wing Chun can be used effectively by beginning practitioners; also because of its simplicity, at its most advanced, Wing Chun is a devastatingly efficient style.
Twisting Faith
When I came to Albany in 1978 as a student, one of the first actions I was involved in was convincing the University at Albany, then called the State University of New York at Albany, to include sexual orientation in its non-discrimination policy.
*By Libbey Post 365Gay.com Libby Post is President of Communication Services, an Albany, New York-based full-service marketing firm serving the not-for-profit, health care, tourism and small business sectors. She has just launched a new firm, www.outmarketing.biz, which provides marketing services to companies that want to reach the gay and lesbian market. Post is also President Emeritus of the Capital District Gay and Lesbian Community Council and Founding Chair of the Empire State Pride Agenda. She has received numerous honors including being named one of the 100 Women of Excellence by the Albany-Colonie Chamber of Commerce and was cited by New York State Governor Mario Cuomo for her work on behalf of New York’s statewide lesbian and gay community.
Friday, March 25, 2022
R.I.P. Taylor Hawkins (1972 - 2022)
The drummer with US rock group Foo Fighters, Taylor Hawkins, has died aged 50, the band have announced.
The band said they were "devastated by the tragic and untimely loss" in a statement on social media. No cause of death has been given.
Hawkins played with Foo Fighters for more than two decades, joining shortly after they finished making their 1997 album The Colour and the Shape.
From The Emerald City - Crisis in Ukraine
My Dear 'OZ'ians,
I have heard that Russia has stated that the first phase of the Special Military Operation (Putin's War) have been mostly completed and now they can shift their focus to free the Donbas region and "come to their rescue".
Shelling/missile strikes will likely continue in the rest of Ukraine. "Bad Putin! Bad Putin!"
I think it's more like they've lost the war in the west of Ukraine and are shifting their focus on something more attainable - just to protect Russian, and mostly Putin's ego. After all losing a war that you start with heavy losses in terms of casualties, something between 7,000 and 40,000 soldiers, killed or wounded, plus the immense loss of military equipment, is certainly no feather in Vladimir Putin's cap. Its a humiliating defeat for Russia and they are shifting focus and saving face that phase one of the military objective has been mostly completed, when its quite obvious it has not!
Stay strong Ukraine!
Слава Україні!
The Wizard
Note: This post is the opinion of The Wizard of 'OZ' and no-one else and reflects as best I can tell from the available information out there.
"The Meanest Mother"
Famous People Quotes
Thursday, March 24, 2022
80's Flashback - Twilight Zone - The Movie
What makes this so interesting is the number of stars now famous were just starting out in the 80's...
ROD SERLING'S phenomenally successful television series, ''The Twilight Zone,'' which had a five-year network run beginning in 1959 and which seems to have been in reruns ever since, has now passed through its own twilight zone and become a flabby, mini-minded behemoth called ''Twilight Zone - the Movie.''
The film is composed of a prologue, written for the movie, plus four separate stories, each of them either based directly on a script from the television series or suggested by one. A lot of money and several lives might have been saved if the producers had just re-released the original programs.
Of the four stories, the last, directed by George Miller, is tops, meaning that it's pretty good. This tale, based on ''Nightmare at 20,000 Feet,'' is about a tense airplane passenger who, during a night flight in a thunderstorm, looks out his window and becomes convinced that some sort of creature is dismantling the outboard engine.
Mr. Miller, the Australian director who demonstrated his talent for spectacular action with ''The Road Warrior,'' does what he can with this limited material, and John Lithgow is both legitimate and comic as the hysterical passenger.
The film's third segment, based on a tale called ''It's a Good Life,'' contains a number of wildly eerie possibilities that are never satisfactorily developed. Kathleen Quinlan plays an innocent young woman who finds herself drawn into a macabre household whose inhabitants behave like Tom, Jerry, Bugs Bunny and other cartoon characters that are forever playing on the screens of the house's dozens of television sets. The master of the house is a sweetlooking, arbitrarily vicious little boy, Anthony, played by Jeremy Licht.
Joe Dante, the director, never finds a style for the piece, which should somehow combine the comic, the scary and the satirical. Trivia experts might note that Billy Mumy, who played Anthony in the original teleplay, has a small role as an adult in this film version.
Except for the central performance by Scatman Crothers, the film's second segment, based on the episode called ''Kick the Can,'' is inept in every way. Of all unlikely people, Steven Spielberg directed this rather ugly, sentimental comedy set in an old-people's home.
John Landis, currently represented by the stylish ''Trading Places,'' is responsible for the film's first segment, a muddled antibigotry lesson about a fellow who hates blacks, Jews and Orientals. Through a series of ''Twilight Zone'' twists of fate, the fellow finds himself being persecuted as a Jew in Nazi-occupied France, lynched as a black by Ku Klux Klansmen in the South and shot at as a Vietnamese by American soldiers in Vietnam.
It was while making this segment that Vic Morrow, who gives a good performance as the bigot, and two Vietnamese children were killed in a production accident.
Mr. Landis also directed the film's prologue, which features Dan Aykroyd and Albert Brooks. It's funny and extremely short.
''Twilight Zone - the Movie,'' which has been rated PG (''parental guidance suggested''), contains some unrefined language.
Beyond Twilight
TWILIGHT ZONE - THE MOVIE, created by Rod Serling; music by Jerry Goldsmith; produced by Steven Spielberg and John Landis; released by Warner Bros. At RKO Twin, Broadway and 45th Street; Sutton, Third Avenue and 57th Street; 34th Street Showplace, near Second Avenue; New York Twin, Second Avenue and 66th Street and other theaters. Running time: 102 minutes. This film is rated PG.
PROLOGUE AND SEGMENT 1
Written and directed by John Landis; director of photography, Stevan Larner; film editor, Malcolm Campbell.
Passenger . . . . . Dan Aykroyd
Driver . . . . . Albert Brooks
Bill . . . . . Vic Morrow
Larry . . . . . Doug McGrath
Ray . . . . . Charles Hallahan
Bar Patron . . . . . Steven Williams
French Mother . . . . . Annette Claudier
Vietnamese . . . . . Joseph Hieu, Albert Leong
Charming G.I. . . . . . Stephen Bishop
SEGMENT 2
Directed by Steven Spielberg; screenplay by George Clayton Johnson, Richard Matheson and Josh Rogan; story by Mr. Johnson; director of photography, Allen Daviau; film editor, Michael Kahn.
Mr. Bloom . . . . . Scatman Crothers
Mr. Conroy . . . . . Bill Quinn
Mr. Weinstein . . . . . Martin Garner
Mrs. Weinstein . . . . . Selma Diamond
Mrs. Dempsey . . . . . Helen Shaw
Mr. Agee . . . . . Murray Matheson
Mr. Mute . . . . . Peter Brocco
Miss Cox . . . . . Priscilla Pointer
SEGEMENT 3
Directed by Joe Dante; screenplay by Richard Matheson, based on a story by Jerome Bixby; director of photography, John Hora; film editor, Tina Hirsch.
Helen Foley . . . . . Kathleen Quinlan
Anthony . . . . . Jeremy Licht
Uncle Walt . . . . . Kevin McCarthy
Mother . . . . . Patricia Barry
Father . . . . . William Schallert
Ethel . . . . . Nancy Cartwright
SEGMENT 4
Directed by George Miller; screenplay by Richard Matheson, based on a story by Richard Matheson; director of photography, Allen Daviau; film editor, Howard Smith.
Valentine . . . . . John Lithgow
Sr. Stewardess . . . . . Abbe Lane
Jr. Stewardess . . . . . Donna Dixon
Co-Pilot . . . . . John Dennis Johnston
Creature . . . . . Larry Cedar
Sky Marshal . . . . . Charles Knapp
Little Girl . . . . . Christina Nigra
Mother . . . . . Lonna Schwab
The Human Toll of The Russia-Ukraine War
Al Jazeera has put together an interactive feature documenting the humanitarian cost of Russia’s offensive.
Click here or on the image above to take a look.
The Unstoppable Virus
I thought you would want to know about this e-mail virus. Even the most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one. It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.
Symptoms:
1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. Done that!
2. Causes you to send a blank e-mail! That too!
3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. Yep!
4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you. Who me?
5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. Well darn!
6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished. Oh no - not again!
7. Causes you to hit "DELETE" instead of "SEND." and I just hate that!
8. Causes you to hit "SEND" when you should "DELETE." Oh No!
IT IS CALLED THE "C-NILE VIRUS."
Remember this next time you pee in someone's bushes.
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her...."Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag..." "Damn!" says the little old lady....."I'd better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"
"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money?" Did you steal it?"
"Oh, no", says the little old lady. "You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!"
"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Well", says the little old lady, "not all of them pay"
Sometimes the world is a bush to some... Watch yer pecker!
Wednesday, March 23, 2022
From The Emerald City - Crisis in Ukraine
My Dear 'OZ'ians,
It seems that Russia is staging a "false-flag" and accusing Ukraine of producing chemical and nuclear weapons. A "false-flag" is when an aggressor stages non real situations, and then uses those made up situations to do the same thing it has just falsified.
Russia has accused Ukraine as having bio/chemical weapons facilities in Ukraine. They may use that as a way to start using bio/chemical weapons against Ukraine.
Let me be clear. Ukraine (and by extension, the US), does not have any chemical weapons facilities in Ukraine. Russia is just accusing them about that.
I feel pains for the Ukrainian people, that they may be on the receiving end of the use of chemical weapons, or indeed targeted nuclear strike, designed to twist Putin's illegal war to their advantage.
The use of chemical weapons in Ukraine (and elsewhere) is a violation of international law and would change the position of NATO, with regard to non interference directly in or over Ukraine.
Let us please, hope it doesn't come to that.
Stay strong Ukraine!
Слава Україні!
The Wizard
Note: This post is the opinion of The Wizard of 'OZ' and no-one else and reflects as best I can tell from the available information out there.
R.I.P. Madeline Albright (1937 - 2022)
Madeleine Albright, a child refugee from Nazi- and then Soviet-dominated Eastern Europe who rose to become the first female U.S. secretary of state and a mentor to many current and former American statesmen and women, died Wednesday of cancer, her family said. She was 84.
She pushed for the alliance to intervene in the Balkans to stop genocide and ethnic cleansing, sought to reduce the spread of nuclear weapons, and championed human rights and democracy across the globe. The news of her death comes as NATO leaders, including US President Joe Biden, prepare to meet Thursday in Brussels for a summit on Russia's invasion in Ukraine.
I can post it cuz....
Two Gay Men and a Baby
Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. Two dozen babies are in the ward, 23 of which are crying and screaming. One, over in the corner, is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by, and to the gays' delight, she points out the happy child as theirs.
"Isn't it wonderful?" Brad exclaims. "All these unhappy children, and ours is so happy." The nurse says, "He's happy now. But just wait until we take the pacifier out of his butt."
Some Interesting Facts
Did you know ..........
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
A crocodile can't stick it's tongue out.
A shrimp's heart is in their head.
People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heartstops for a mili-second.
In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand (or attempted to do so - apart from Bones).
It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
A pregnant goldfish is called a twit
Between 1937 and 1945 Heinz produced a version of Alphabetti Spaghetti especially for the German market that consisted solely of little pastaswastikas.
In average, a human being will have sex more than 3,000 times and spend two weeks kissing in their lifetime.
More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call.
Rats and horses can't vomit.
The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.
If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. if you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out.
Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.
Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14, Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations, implemented on July 16, 1969, make it illegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or their vehicles?
In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.
A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their buttocks.
In the course of an average lifetime you will, while sleeping, eat 70 assorted insects and 10 spiders.
Most lipstick contains fish scales.
Cat's urine glows under a black-light.
Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.
Over 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.