I had to laugh!

 

TIME TO REST

It has been said that the amount of sleep required by the average person is just five minutes more! Too many of us are chronically sleep-deprived. Late to bed and early to rise. And it costs us dearly.

Dr. Dean Ornish wrote a bestselling book called STRESS, DIET AND YOUR HEART. It was a good book. In it he talks about how to manage stress, how diet promotes a health life and why proper stress management and good diet affects ones heart.

He should have been on top of the world. He had just turned forty. He was fit and healthy. STRESS, DIET AND YOUR HEART soared to the top of The New York Times bestseller list. So what was the problem?

Where was the joy and fulfillment he so desperately wanted?

He was working more than 80 hours a week, what with speaking, promoting his book and working, and he was exhausted. A wake-up call came in a conversation with a flight attendant. Ornish had just barely made it in time for his flight and he collapsed into his seat.

A flight attendant noticed his frazzled state. She remarked, "You look harried."

"I feel harried," he admitted.

The attendant tried to encourage him. She said, "I just read a book that might help! She said she highly recommended it. It was a book called STRESS, DIET AND YOUR HEART. She told him that it had some wonderful stress-management techniques that he might try.

At that point Dr. Ornish decided to make the changes he so desperately needed.

(From "Why Being Happy Keeps You Healthy," by Dean Ornish, M.D., "Family Circle," April 1, 1998)

We need lots of rest. These bodies are beautiful creations. They run practically on peanuts and, when well cared for, they can serve us splendidly for many years. But when neglected they run down like an unwound clock.

Sir John Lubbock once said this about relaxation: "Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass on a summer day listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is hardly a waste of time."

Is it time to rest?

by Steve Goodiera

A great prayer

Thought you might enjoy this interesting prayer given in Kansas at the opening session of their Senate. It seems prayer still upsets some people!!

When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open the new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is what they heard:

"Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values.


We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery.

We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.

We have killed our unborn and called it choice.

We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable.

We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem.

We have abused power and called it politics.

We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition.

We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression.


We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.

Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every sin and set us free.  Amen!"

Toon

 

Can You See it?

There is a hidden picture inside the picture below. It can be seen in 3D without 3D glasses! Take a hard look and see if you can find the 'hidden candies'...

*Magic Eye

New Anti Smoking Vaccine

 Doctors test anti-smoking vaccine

 MADISON, Wis. (Associated Press) -- Doctors are testing a radical new way to help smokers quit: a shot that "immunizes" them against the nicotine rush that fuels their addiction. That pleasurable buzz has seduced Mario Musachia into burning through nearly half a million cigarettes in half a century. Now the Madison man is among 300 people around the country who are testing an experimental vaccine that makes the immune system attack nicotine in much the same way it would fight a life-threatening germ. 

The treatment keeps nicotine from reaching the brain, making smoking less pleasurable and theoretically, easier to give up. The small amount that still manages to get in helps to ease withdrawal, the main reason most quitters relapse. If it works -- and this has not yet been proved -- the vaccine could become part of a new generation of smoking cessation treatments. They attack dependency in the brain instead of just replacing the nicotine from cigarettes in a less harmful way, like the gum, lozenges, patches and nasal sprays sold today.

Well.... He ain't lying!

R.I.P. Ed Asner (1929 - 2021)

Ed Asner has peacefully passed away at 91 with the comfort of his family. Ed Asner was famous for portraying Lou Grant on The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Asner, who also endeared himself to a new generation of fans by playing a grumpy Santa in the 2003 movie "Elf" and was the voice the grieving widower in the animated 2009 movie "Up," was with his family when he died.

Ask The Wizard (Email Hoaxes)

Dear Wizard of 'OZ',

I keep getting emails from friends which I then pass on to other friends. Recently I was berated by an advanced computer user that the email was a hoax and told not to SPAM him anymore.

Now I feel stupid. Any way to spot these "Hoax" emails?

Signed,

Addle-brained Allan

Dear Addle-brained,

Without researching the factual claims made in a forwarded email there's no 100 percent sure way to tell it if it's a hoax, but here you'll find a list of common signs to watch for...

1. Note whether the text you've received was actually written by the person who sent it. Did anyone sign their name to it? If not, be skeptical.

2. Look for the telltale phrase, 'Forward this to everyone you know!' The more urgent the plea, the more suspect the message.

3. Look for statements like 'This is NOT a hoax' or 'This is NOT an urban legend.' They typically mean the opposite of what they say.

4. Watch for overly emphatic language, as well as frequent use of UPPERCASE LETTERS and multiple exclamation points!!!!!!!

5. If the text seems aimed more at persuading than informing the reader, be suspicious. Like propagandists, hoaxers are more interested in pushing people's emotional buttons than communicating accurate information.

6. If the message purports to impart extremely important information that you've never heard of before or read elsewhere in legitimate venues, be very suspicious.

7. Read carefully and think critically about what the message says, looking for logical inconsistencies, violations of common sense and blatantly false claims.

8. Look for subtle or not-so-subtle jokes — indications that the author is pulling your leg.

9. Check for references to outside sources of information. Hoaxes don't typically cite verifiable evidence, nor link to Websites with corroborating information.

10. Check to see if the message has been debunked by Websites that debunk urban legends and Internet hoaxes (see below).

11. Research any factual claims in the text to see if there is published evidence to support them. If you find none, odds are you've been the recipient of an email hoax. Then CHOOSE NOT to forward them!

TIPS:

1. Virtually any email chain letter you receive (i.e., any message forwarded multiple times before it got to you) is more likely to be false than true. You should automatically be skeptical of chain letters.

2. Hoaxers usually try every means available to make their lies believable -- e.g., mimicking a journalistic style, attributing the text to a 'legitimate' source, or implying that powerful corporate or government interests have tried to keep the information from you.

3. Be especially wary of health-related rumors. Most importantly, never act on 'medical information' forwarded from unknown sources without first verifying its accuracy with a doctor or other reliable source.

Urban Legends Website

Hope this helps you Allan.

Yrs,

The Wizard

Washing Clothes Recipe

 

Years ago an Alabama grandmother gave a new bride the following recipe:

(This is an exact copy as written and found in an old scrapbook along with the spelling errors and all.)

WASHING CLOTHES

Build fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water. Set tubs so smoke wont blow in eyes if wind is pert. Shave one hole cake of lie soap in boilin water.

Sort things, make 3 piles
1 pile white,
1 pile coloured,
1 pile work britches and rags.

To make starch, stir flour in cool water to smooth, then thin down with boiling water.

Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, and boil, then rub colored don't boil just wrench and starch.

Take things out of kettle with broom stick handle, then wrench, and starch.

Hang old rags on fence.

Spread tea towels on grass.

Pore wrench water in flower bed. Scrub porch with hot soapy water. Turn tubs upside down.

Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs. Brew cup of tea, sit and rock a spell and count your blessings.

OK people, paste this over your washer and dryer. Next time when you think things are hard, read it again, kiss that washing machine and dryer, and give thanks.
First thing each morning you should run and hug your washer and dryer, also your toilet those two-holers used to get mighty cold!

For you non-southerners - wrench means rinse. ;-)

Here are some signs your Netflix account has been hacked

1. Your account has been changed, upgraded or has titles you never watched in Recently watched or Continue watching

2. There are other logins from devices that you don't recognize

3. Plan has changed when you did not request an upgrade

If any of the above has happened on your Netflix (or other streaming account), Change your password and log out of all devices and inform Netflix customer service.

We have an excellent work environment...

 

Humans are NOT a virus...

 

My reaction to everything right now...

 

Seems Legit...

 

Jinx

 

A jinx (also jynx), in popular superstition and folklore, is a curse or the attribute of attracting bad or negative luck.

The word "jynx" meaning the bird wryneck and sometimes a charm or spell has been in use in English since the seventeenth century. The modern spelling and connotations developed late in the nineteenth century. In the 21st-century press, the suggestion a ship might be "jinxed" was made in connection with two cruise liners after misfortunes, MS Queen Victoria and the Emerald Princess. In the 20th century, the Australian aircraft carrier HMAS Melbourne was sometimes said to be jinxed, having twice struck a friendly ship, with considerable loss of life.

Jinx is also the name given to a game between friends (especially children) when two people say the same word or phrase at the same time; and they then call 'jinx'.

Brain Teasers

 

Read out loud the text inside the triangle below:

More than likely you said, "A bird in the bush," and........ if this IS what YOU said, then you failed to see that the word THE is repeated twice! Sorry, look again. Next, let's play with some words. What do you see?

In black you can read the word GOOD, in white the word EVIL (inside each black letter is a white letter). It's all very physiological too, because it visualize the concept that good can't exist without evil (or the absence of good is evil ). Now, what do you see?

You may not see it at first, but the white spaces read the word optical, the blue landscape reads the word illusion. Look again! Can you see why this painting is called an optical illusion? What do you see here?

This one is quite tricky! The word TEACH reflects as LEARN. Last one. What do you see?

You probably read the word ME in brown, but....... when you look through ME you will see YOU! Do you need to look again?

Test Your Brain. This is really cool. The second one is amazing so please read all the way though. ALZHEIMERS' EYE TEST Count every "F" in the following text: FINISHED FILES ARE THE RE SULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTI FIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS... (SEE BELOW) 

HOW MANY ? WRONG, THERE ARE 6 -- no joke. READ IT AGAIN ! Really, go Back and Try to find the 6 F's before you scroll down. The reasoning behind is further down. The brain cannot process "OF".

Anyone who counts all 6 "F's" on the first go is a genius.

Three is normal, four is quite rare. Send this post to your friends buy clicking on the 'Permanent Link'. Copy this into an email and VOILA! It will drive them crazy! And keep them occupied for several minutes..!

More Brain Stuff . . . From Cambridge University. raed tihs. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs psas it on!!

Toons

 

Dear Tech Support

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the performance of flower and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9, but installed undesirable programs such NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Conversation 8.0, no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Desperate

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind. Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try to enter the command: C:/l THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilty ~.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring loudly.WAV files.

DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program.

These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve performance.

I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

Meanwhile at Wal-Mart

So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour "monitors" and then this happened.

Her - why are you double bagging all of your groceries?

Me - excuse me?

Her - you are wasting our bags!

Me - if you don't like the way I'm bagging the groceries, feel free to come on over here and bag them yourself.

Her - that's not my job!

Me - okay, then I will bag my groceries how I please if that's all right with you.

Her - why are you using two bags?!

Me - because the bags are weak and I don't want the handles to break or the bottoms to rip out.

Her - well that's because you are putting too much stuff in the bag. If you took half of that stuff out and put it in a different bag then you wouldn't need to double bag.

*10 seconds of me just staring at her.

Me - so you want me to split these items in half and put half of them in a different bag so that I don't have to double bag.

Her - exactly.

Me - so I would still be using two bags to hold the same number of items.

Her - no because you wouldn't be double bagging.

*me pressing two fingers to my left eye in an attempt to make it stop twitching.

Me - okay so here I have a jug of milk and a bottle of juice double bagged. If I take the milk out and remove the double bagging and just put the milk in the single bag and the juice in that single bag I'm still using two bags for these two items.

Her- no because you are not double bagging them so it's not the same number of bags.

*me looking around at about 10 other customers who at this point are enjoying the show.

Me- is this like that Common Core math stuff I keep hearing about?

Her- never mind you just don't get it. 

And with that, she went back to her little Podium so she could continue texting or playing games on her phone or whatever it was she was doing before she decided to come over and critique my bagging skills. 

Mouse Story ...

 

Mouse Story ...

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. "What food might this contain?" The mouse wondered - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning. 

"There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it." The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" 

The pig sympathized, but said, "I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers." The mouse turned to the cow and said, 

"There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose." So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap-- alone. 

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house -- like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital and she returned home with a fever. Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient. But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig. The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them. 

The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness. So, the next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn't concern you, remember --

When one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another. REMEMBER: EACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY; OUR LIVES ARE WOVEN TOGETHER FOR A REASON. One of the best things to hold onto in this world is a friend.
Amen. 

*Thanks, Dad

Linux is 30 Years old today!

 

Thirty years ago today, Linus Torvalds announced his free operating system to the world. As with many of the world’s greatest, Linux had humble beginnings as a very small pet project. The GNU was working on an ambitious free, public domain operating system but the project had been delayed, and enthusiasts were quick to adopt Linus’ new project. Over the years Linux has grown into a globally available, free software base that has remained largely resilient to interference from individual governments, corporations, and academic institutions. Linux enhances the lives of billions of people around the world, running in everything from server computers to smartphones, to embedded devices.

Today we celebrate thirty years of Linux and the worldwide free, open source software movement that has developed and grown along with the operating system; and we make a toast to Linus and the thing that he started. Happy birthday Linux!

*From ubuntu.com

*Wizard's Note: I myself have used Ubuntu Linux for 12 years. My how that time has flown. I have not used Windows at home since then. In addition to my Ubuntu desktop, I have a laptop with Ubuntu and another with Puppy Linux, which was my first exposure to Linux. I do have a tablet that I don't use anymore. Just have to figure out how to remove Windows 10 - It's a phablet - Windows 10/Android its not possible, then I will destroy the OS and recycle it. Alternatively, If I can reset the Windows partition I will sell it as an Windows/Android tablet, assuming it will still boot , lol.

TRUE or FALSE?

 

The first man to play an accordion in Carnegie Hall serenaded the audience with “The Beer Barrel Polka.” 

 In 1939, Charles Magnante, along with Joe Biviano, Abe Goldman, and Gene von Hallberg were the first to play accordions within the hallowed walls of Carnegie Hall. Their first selection was Bach’s Toccata and Fugue in D Minor.

More Aesop's Fables

The Pomegranate, Apple-Tree, and Bramble 

The Pomegranate and Apple-Tree disputed as to which was the most beautiful. When their strife was at its height, a Bramble from the neighboring hedge lifted up its voice, and said in a boastful tone: "Pray, my dear friends, in my presence at least cease from The Wolf and the Lamb 

Wolf, meeting with a Lamb astray from the fold, resolved not to lay violent hands on him, but to find some plea to justify to the Lamb the Wolf's right to eat him. He thus addressed him: "Sirrah, last year you grossly insulted me." "Indeed," bleated the Lamb in a mournful tone of voice, "I was not then born." Then said the Wolf, "You feed in my pasture." "No, good sir," replied the Lamb, "I have not yet tasted grass." Again said the Wolf, "You drink of my well." "No," exclaimed the Lamb, "I never yet drank water, for as yet my mother's milk is both food and drink to me." Upon which the Wolf seized him and ate him up, saying, "Well! I won't remain supper-less, even though you refute every one of my imputations." The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny. such vain disputings." 

The Farmer and the Stork 

A Farmer placed nets on his newly-sown ploughlands and caught a number of Cranes, which came to pick up his seed. With them he trapped a Stork that had fractured his leg in the net and was earnestly beseeching the Farmer to spare his life. "Pray save me, Master," he said, "and let me go free this once. My broken limb should excite your pity. Besides, I am no Crane, I am a Stork, a bird of excellent character; and see how I love and slave for my father and mother. Look too, at my feathers-- they are not the least like those of a Crane." The Farmer laughed aloud and said, "It may be all as you say, I only know this: I have taken you with these robbers, the Cranes, and you must die in their company." 

Birds of a feather flock together. 

The Farmer and the Snake 

One winter a Farmer found a Snake stiff and frozen with cold. He had compassion on it, and taking it up, placed it in his bosom. The Snake was quickly revived by the warmth, and resuming its natural instincts, bit its benefactor, inflicting on him a mortal wound. "Oh," cried the Farmer with his last breath, "I am rightly served for pitying a scoundrel." 

The greatest kindness will not bind the ungrateful. 

The Fawn and His Mother 

A young fawn once said to his Mother, "You are larger than a dog, and swifter, and more used to running, and you have your horns as a defense; why, then, O Mother! do the hounds frighten you so?" She smiled, and said: "I know full well, my son, that all you say is true. I have the advantages you mention, but when I hear even the bark of a single dog I feel ready to faint, and fly away as fast as I can." 

No arguments will give courage to the coward. 

The Bear and the Fox 

A Bear boasted very much of his philanthropy, saying that of all animals he was the most tender in his regard for man, for he had such respect for him that he would not even touch his dead body. A Fox hearing these words said with a smile to the Bear, "Oh! that you would eat the dead and not the living." 

The Swallow and the Crow 

The Swallow and the Crow had a contention about their plumage. The Crow put an end to the dispute by saying, "Your feathers are all very well in the spring, but mine protect me against the winter." 

Fair weather friends are not worth much. 

The Mountain in Labor 

A Mountain was once greatly agitated. Loud groans and noises were heard, and crowds of people came from all parts to see what was the matter. While they were assembled in anxious expectation of some terrible calamity, out came a Mouse. 

Don't make much ado about nothing. 

The Ass, the Fox, and the Lion 

The Ass and the Fox, having entered into partnership together for their mutual protection, went out into the forest to hunt. They had not proceeded far when they met a Lion. The Fox, seeing imminent danger, approached the Lion and promised to contrive for him the capture of the Ass if the Lion would pledge his word not to harm the Fox. Then, upon assuring the Ass that he would not be injured, the Fox led him to a deep pit and arranged that he should fall into it. The Lion, seeing that the Ass was secured, immediately clutched the Fox, and attacked the Ass at his leisure.  

The Da Vinci Code and The Pentacle

It is NOT a symbol of devil worship! In fact, Wiccans don't believe in the devil, so why would we worship it?????

With the popularity of Dan Brown's book, The Da Vinci Code and that it's a motion picture, people have noticed the references to The Pentacle, Wicca and the like. I had made a web page that tries to explain The Pentacle, and why Wiccans use it almost universally as their symbol of The Sacred Feminine. In most Pagan religions, there requires a balance in everything.... Goddess and God, male and female, positive and negative, above and below, the Ying and Yang as you will. Click on The Pentacle below and find out more about this most misunderstood symbol:

Click Above.

Good Rebuttle!

A Saskatchewan farmer had bought 14 pieces of farm eqipment, the last being a new pickup, from his golfing buddy over the past 10 years. One day the friend called him to say that he had just purchased an acreage south of town, and wanted a nice looking cow to put in the small pasture that came with the property saying, "My wife thinks it would look pretty".

Two days later the farmer delivered the animal along with the following bill of sale:

Basic Cow $499.95
Shipping and handling $35.95
Two tone exterior $142.95
Produce storage compartment $126.95
Heavy duty straw chopper $189.95
Four spigot/high output drain system $149.95
Automatic fly swatter $88.95
Genuine cowhide upholstery $179.95
Deluxe dual horns $59.95
Automatic fertilizer attachment $339.95
4 x 4 traction drive assembly $884.95
Pre-delivery wash and comb $69.95

Sub-total $2,768.70

Shop supplies and materials (1%) $27.69

PST and GST $391.49

FARMERS SUGGESTED LIST PRICE: $3,187.88
Additional dealer adjustments: $300.00
TOTAL (Including options): $3487.88

PREFERRED CUSTOMER DISCOUNT - $50.00

SALE PRICE $3,437.88

R.I.P. Charlie Watts (1941 - 2021)

 

Charlie Watts, the drummer who provided the backbone of the Rolling Stones' songs for more than half a century, has died, his publicist said. He was 80.

Bernard Doherty said Tuesday that Watts "passed away peacefully in a London hospital earlier today surrounded by his family."

Crystal Meth

Dealing with Teenage Methamphetamine Use

Identifying and dealing with teenage drug use is a frightening prospect for any parent. But we live in a world where teens have so many opportunities for losing their way. They have the time and money for vices and less supervision at home. And drugs today are even more powerful and addictive than ever.

Methamphetamine (known on the street as "speed," "meth," "crank," "crystal-meth") is a central nervous system stimulant that is among the most dangerous drugs available. Like cocaine, it is a powerful "upper" that produces alertness and feelings of elation, along with a variety of adverse reactions. Methamphetamine is sometimes called the "poor man’s cocaine," because it costs nearly the same as cocaine with much longer lasting effects.

Methamphetamine can be swallowed, smoked, snorted, or injected. Under the influence of the drug, users often become agitated and "wired." Their behaviour becomes unpredictable: friendly and calm one moment, angry and terrified the next. Once users become too tired to continue using or run out of meth, they will begin to "crash." Initially, the crash is marked by agitated depression, which soon gives way to lethargy, followed by a long deep sleep. Once the user awakens, the depression returns and may last for days. This is the time when the potential for suicide is high.

With prolonged high-dose use or long binges, stimulant psychosis may develop. User may feel intensely paranoid, hear voices, and experience bizarre delusions (such as thinking that people are talking about and/or following them). Methamphetamine-induced panic and psychosis can be extremely dangerous and may result in incidents of extreme violence.

Dangers and consequences of meth use include:

• sleeplessness
  
• nausea, vomiting, diarrhea
  
• skin ulceration and infection, the result of picking at imaginary bugs
  
• paranoia, anxiety, irritability
  
• depression
  
• increased blood pressure due to the constriction of blood vessels (may produce headaches, chest pain, or irregular heartbeat and lead to stroke or heart attack)
  
• seizures
  
• permanent brain cell damage
  
• for intravenous (IV) users: AIDS, hepatitis, infections and sores at the injection site, and infection of the heart lining and valves (endocarditis)

If you are a parent concerned that your teenager may be using meth, there are symptoms you should look for. You may notice a striking degeneration of your child's attitude, school attendance and marks, dress, personal hygiene, complexion and skin condition, along with increased mood swings, weight loss, and irregular sleeping patterns such as long waking and sleeping periods (days). A change of friends, secrecy, missing monies and valuables, dropping out of extra curriculum activities, and verbal aggression and/or the threat of physical aggression are also warning signs. If you suspect your child of drug use, contact a professional or counselor to help guide you through the process of acknowledging, confronting, and dealing with this problem. Professionals, non-profits, and faith-based organizations are available throughout Saskatchewan to help you and your family through this difficult time. Teen Challenge Saskatchewan Phone: 306-664-4673

Click above for more info

My Bad Boss Contest

WorkingAmerica.org is seeking entries for its "My Bad Boss" contest and is having no trouble finding worthy candidates. This summer, one winner will be crowned from among five semifinalists. Here are the first two: 

Millionaire Dentist Stole from Employees on 9/11 By Cat Scratch Never mind that the dentist I worked for was the cheapest bastard in the world (trying to get out of paying me for a mandatory meeting by arguing that he paid for lunch), and that he was unethical (prescribing painkillers to addicted patients in exchange for pricy dental procedures they didn't need). Never mind all that. Dr. X proved himself to be the worst kind of person imaginable during the week of 9/11. That day, the patients all canceled their appointments. Perfectly understandable, if you ask me: There's a national tragedy, and the last thing on anyone's mind is their oral health. But this meant no income for Dr. X. His response? Taking $100 out of every employee's paycheck. Mind you, we were paid hourly, not based on production. In the wake of a travesty that should bring out the best in people, he had the audacity to steal money from his own employees. Not that it was even necessary. Dr. X earned over a million dollars a year. He owned a mansion. Did he really need my $13/hour that badly? Apparently so. I promptly quit. Lucky for me, a better job was around the corner. As for Dr. X--his karma will catch up with him. 
People Commit Suicide Every Day By Wounded Healer, Michigan "He paints by the number," was the excuse I was given when I wanted to okay a psychiatric hospital stay for a patient who was out of state. My patient was a veteran suffering from trauma triggered by watching news coverage of the war in Iraq. He had been taken to emergency and when they called for authorization, my boss said they cost too much. I tried to get the hospital to bring the price down. So, they discharged my patient after making him put $5,000 on his credit card. I tried to get the money back for him and get my boss to okay paying the hospital. It went back and forth for too long. The patient committed suicide. He shot himself in the head. I couldn't quit crying when I heard and took the rest of the day off. I used my personal time to do it. My boss complained to my supervisor. He said, "I don't know why she had to take the day off. People commit suicide everyday." I no longer work there. I'm in therapy now.

Biological versus nonbiological older brothers and men’s sexual orientation

 The most consistent biodemographic correlate of sexual orientation in men is the number of older brothers (fraternal birth order). The mechanism underlying this effect remains unknown.In this article, I provide a direct test pitting prenatal against postnatal (e.g., social/rearing) mechanisms. Four samples of homosexual and heterosexual men (total n = 944), including one sample of men raised in nonbiological and blended families (e.g., raised with half- or step-siblings or as adoptees) were studied.Only biological older brothers, and not any other sibling characteristic, including nonbiological older brothers, predicted men’s sexual orientation, regardless of the amount of time reared with these siblings. These results strongly suggest a prenatal origin to the fraternal birth-order effect. 

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Seniors Can't Be All Bad

Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not blame others.

HOWEVER, upon reflection, we would like to point out that it was NOT the senior citizens who took:

The melody out of music,
The pride out of appearance,
The courtesy out of driving,
The romance out of love,
The commitment out of marriage,
The responsibility out of parenthood,
The togetherness out of the family,
The learning out of education,
The service out of patriotism,
The Golden Rule from rulers,
The nativity scene out of cities,
The civility out of behavior,
The refinement out of language,
The dedication out of employment,
The prudence out of spending,
The ambition out of achievement, or,
God out of government and school.

And we certainly are NOT the ones who eliminated patience and tolerance from personal relationships and interactions with others!!

YES, I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN!

I'm the life of the party...... even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
I'm very good at opening childproof caps... with a hammer.
I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a thing you're saying.
I'm very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over...
I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not nearly as cute as mine.
I'm so cared for -- long term care, eye care, private care, dental care.

I'm not really grouchy,

I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, Jenny Craig and Toyota commercials, barking dogs, politicians and a few other things I can't seem to remember right now.

I'm sure everything I can't find is in a safe secure place, somewhere.
I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
I'm having trouble remembering simple words like.......
I'm beginning to realize that aging is not for wimps.
I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days, and when did they let kids become policemen?
I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?
And, how can my kids be older than I feel sometimes?

I'm a walking storeroom of facts..... I've just lost the key to the storeroom door.

Yes, I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I am having the time of my life!

Now if I could only remember who sent this to me....

Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor!

 

R.I.P. Don Everly (1937 - 2021)

He was known for tracks like “Bye Bye Love,” “Let It Be Me,” “All I Have to Do Is Dream” and “Wake Up Little Susie"...

Don Everly, one-half of the pioneering Everly Brothers whose harmonizing country rock hits impacted a generation of rock ‘n’ roll music, has died. He was 84.

Everly died at his home in Nashville, Tennessee, on Saturday, according to his attorney and family spokesperson Linda Edell Howard. His brother, Phil Everly, died in January 2014 at age 74.

Note to self...

 

Arctic Hares

 

These are called Arctic Hares. They look like bunny pups. 

3 months 'till we get snow in Saskatchewan!

More Aesop's Fables

The Traveler and His Dog 

A traveler about to set out on a journey saw his Dog stand at the door stretching himself. He asked him sharply: "Why do you stand there gaping? Everything is ready but you, so come with me instantly." The Dog, wagging his tail, replied: "O, master! I am quite ready; it is you for whom I am waiting." 

The loiterer often blames delay on his more active friend. 

The Dog and the Shadow 

A Dog, crossing a bridge over a stream with a piece of flesh in his mouth, saw his own shadow in the water and took it for that of another Dog, with a piece of meat double his own in size. He immediately let go of his own, and fiercely attacked the other Dog to get his larger piece from him. He thus lost both: that which he grasped at in the water, because it was a shadow; and his own, because the stream swept it away. 

The Mole and His Mother 

A Mole, a creature blind from birth, once said to his Mother: "I am sure than I can see, Mother!" In the desire to prove to him his mistake, his Mother placed before him a few grains of frankincense, and asked, "What is it?' The young Mole said, "It is a pebble." His Mother exclaimed: "My son, I am afraid that you are not only blind, but that you have lost your sense of smell. 

The Herdsman and the Lost Bull 

A herdsman tending his flock in a forest lost a Bull-calf from the fold. After a long and fruitless search, he made a vow that, if he could only discover the thief who had stolen the Calf, he would offer a lamb in sacrifice to Hermes, Pan, and the Guardian Deities of the forest. Not long afterwards, as he ascended a small hillock, he saw at its foot a Lion feeding on the Calf. Terrified at the sight, he lifted his eyes and his hands to heaven, and said: "Just now I vowed to offer a lamb to the Guardian Deities of the forest if I could only find out who had robbed me; but now that I have discovered the thief, I would willingly add a full-grown Bull to the Calf I have lost, if I may only secure my own escape from him in safety." 

The Hare and the Tortoise 

A Hare one day ridiculed the short feet and slow pace of the Tortoise, who replied, laughing: "Though you be swift as the wind, I will beat you in a race." The Hare, believing her assertion to be simply impossible, assented to the proposal; and they agreed that the Fox should choose the course and fix the goal. On the day appointed for the race the two started together. The Tortoise never for a moment stopped, but went on with a slow but steady pace straight to the end of the course. The Hare, lying down by the wayside, fell fast asleep. At last waking up, and moving as fast as he could, he saw the Tortoise had reached the goal, and was comfortably dozing after her fatigue. 

Slow but steady wins the race.

Pissed off

We have all had bad dates.....but this takes the cake. 

This just tells you how tough it is to be single nowadays. This was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. 

Jay went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. 

The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize! 

She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight).  They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met before. 

The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving  back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. 

They were about an  hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere!  Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. 

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started.  In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. 

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and in deed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. 

All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. 

As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender. 

Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.  Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humour of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some assistance!" 

He came around  the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.. 

Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.  Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! 

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both uickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. 

So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. 

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down... or perhaps that should be "pants down." .. 

And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment: 

"This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off."

Giggles, Guffaws and Groaners

"Madam, your husband must have absolute rest."

"Well, Doctor, he won't listen to me."

"A very good beginning, madam, a very good beginning." 

Predicting the future:

“Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?" --H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

"I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling on his face and not Gary Cooper." --Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in "Gone With The Wind."

"A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make." -- Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting Mrs. Fields' Cookies.

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out." -- Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

"Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible." -- Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

"Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy." -- Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859.

"Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau." -- Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929.

"Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value." -- Marecha Ferdinand Foch, Professor of Strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre.

"Everything that can be invented has been invented." -- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.

"Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction." -- Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872

"The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon." -- Sir John Eric Ericksen, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria 1873. 



I was in a taxi the other day and the driver said, "Do you mind if I put some music on?"

I said, "Not at all."

He said, "Kiss?"

I said, "Let's listen to the music first, then see how we feel." 



I phoned up the fishing helpline today. I said, “I’m really hopeless at fishing and need some tips."

The man said, “Okay, can you hold the line?”

I said, “No.”" 

Grandma: "Oh, what nice new boots! Where did you get them?"

Granddaughter: "At the store."

Grandma: "Which one?"

Granddaughter: "Both of them."

My dentist was voted "Dentist Of The Year"....

He didn't get a trophy, they just gave him a little plaque. 

My mother and father were driving when she was pulled over by the police. Mom was in a hurry and told the officer so.

“I understand ma’am,” he said. “But I have to ticket anyone over 55.”

Mom was beside herself. “That’s discrimination!” she shouted.

The officer explained calmly, “Ma'am, I meant the speed limit.” 

Why was the seafood restaurant being investigated by the IRS?

They were suspected of being a shell company in some fishy business. 

After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair.

As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.

Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.

As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?" 

Waiter: I just wanted to let you know kids eat free.

Dad: Good, I'll have water and my daughter will have the steak and a kid's light beer.

My nephew came over the other day and he was wearing a helmet, shoulder pads, knee pads, and gloves.

He said, "I'm gonna ride my bike!"

I said, "Where? Through a minefield?"

I never got along well with my dad.

Kids used to come up to me and say, "My dad can beat up your dad."

I'd just say, "Yeah, when?"