"Alligators"

Two alligators were sitting at the side of the swamp near Ottawa.

The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you can be so much and be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same size as kids. I just don't get it."

"Well," said the big 'gator, what you been eaten' boy?"

"Senators, same as you," replied the small alligator.

"Hmm. Well, where do y'all catch 'em?"

"Down on the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by Parliament Buildings."

"Same here, hmm, how do you catch them?"

"Well, I crawl up under one of them Lexus' and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab 'them by the leg, and shake the shit out of them, and eat them!"

"Ah!" says the big alligator, "I think I see your problem. You ain't getting' any real nourishment.

See, by the time you get done shaken' the shit out of an Senator, there ain't nothing' left but an asshole and a briefcase."