Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON THE DMV, OH SO TYPICAL 
Woman: I’d like to make an appointment to bring in a dealer registration.

California Department of Motor Vehicles clerk: Do you want to come in today?

Woman: Oh, do you have anything open today?

Clerk: No, nothing before Thursday.

conversation at a California DMV 

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON WOODROW WILSON,
REINCARNATED AND MOONLIGHTING

 Weakest Link host Anne Robinson: Who was prime minister when England won the World Cup in 1966?
Contestant: Woodrow Wilson.



Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON PROGNOSTICATION,
PITIFUL 

I don’t make predictions, especially those considering the future.

--Bloc Québécois leader Gilles Duceppe (thanks to Paul and Leslie Patterson)

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON PASSAGES, SLUGGISH

INSIDE ARE
SAME PATHS
AND PASSAGES
UNCOMFORTABLE
AND TORTOISES.
PAY ATTENTION
DURING THE VISIT.

--on a tourist information sign at Castel Sant’Angelo, Italy

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON “UMM, NOT THE
RESTAURANT”
Family Fortunes host: Where is the Taj Mahal?

Contestant: Opposite the Dental Hospital.

--cover copy on a Chinese bootleg of the movie Catch Me If You Can

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON WE HOCES TO READS MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS
London (AP). Misy J orld2 Iceland’s Hofi Karlsdhair xiz to Gyekjavpl hn Fripbya wion a smil p mzssaage for Soviet Leader Mikhwil Gorsachee and U1.S Pgzxident Gonald Reagwn whom she hoces to meets.
    “It’s a pewceful vhagntrif …” she ywid.

--from the Indonesian Times

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT,
FILM DIALOGUE SUBSECTION
Rudy: You did all this to become immortal? Why?

Exiled priest: TO LIVE FOREVER!

--from the movie House of the Dead (2003)

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON LET’S GET TO WORK ON
PRIORITY NUMBER 3, PRONTO! 
NORTH GA FALCONS PRIORITY LIST

• God

• Family

• Acedemics

• Atheletics

There Are No Exceptions!

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON PEOPLE’S SENATORS, NOT-SO-PEOPLE-Y
I know I’m the people’s senator, but do I have to hang out with them?

--Sen. John Edwards, as reported by former aide Andrew Young in his book The Politician

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON WE DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT
HE’S DOING WITH HIS CLUB
TIGER WOODS PLAYS
WITH OWN BALLS,
NIKE SAYS
--AP headline