Stupid Is As Stupid Says...

ON COACHES, STRANGE FIVE-HEADED COACH TO LEAD WASHINGTON SCHOOL --Wenatchee World (Washington) headline, about a football team that will have five co–head coaches (thanks to Kathy Corbin) 
ON DISTINCTIONS, INDISTINCT  Reporter: Were you apprehensive in the 12th inning?  Baseball great Yogi Berra: No, but I was scared.  
ON CAN’T WE NIP IT SOMEWHERE ELSE?

“We take the dangers of alcohol seriously,” said Spangler. “It’s better to nip it in the butt sooner than later.” 

--from the Daily Nebraskan

ON SHIPWRECKS, LITERARY Have you ever gone to Lake Superior to study the wreck of the F. Scott Fitzgerald? KQRS-FM (Minneapolis, Minnesota) cohost Terri Traen, during an on-air interview with a shipwreck expert about the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald (thanks to Craig Downey)

ON DOH! Computer help desk: And now hit F8.  Caller: It’s not working.  Help desk: What did you do, exactly?  Caller: I hit the F-key eight times as you told me, but nothing’s happening! --actual call to a computer helpline (thanks to Shaye Marie Sauers)