The Wiz On The Street

A computer error fueled a panic at the already jittery New York Stock Exchange Tuesday, causing stocks to fall further. So the Wizard hit the streets again, asking, "What do you think?"

Robin Feil,
Systems Analyst
"I was fooled by the glitch and tried to sell off my portfolio, but luckily I couldn't get my broker on the phone because he shot himself in the head. Whew!"


Jordan Dixon,
Non-Profit Fundraiser
"That's the last straw. I'm taking my money out of stocks right now and putting it toward a hot dog."



Jonathan Edgerton,
Tour Guide
"If anyone could handle a stock-exchange computer glitch, it's those calm, composed Wall Street traders."

*American Voices, The Onion