GAYTWOGETHER is a unique gay site where you'll find relevant news, interesting articles, great pictures and cool stuff for and about gay relationships. Whether you’re "living together" or "dating", "not quite sure yet" or "in a long term relationship", it's all about romance, love and being GAYTWOGETHER.
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Welcome to 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow!! Posting is at 10AM, Noon and 2PM CST daily. Up to 12 days of posts on the main page. The archives have more. You can forward posts by clicking on the envelope at the bottom of the post. Enjoy your stay! *** If you need to contact me, or have a copyright issue, please use the "Contact The Wizard" form on the left side of 'OZ'. Original source and author is cited and credited in each post where possible. ***
Thursday, April 30, 2020
He said... I said
He said to me . ... . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it
I said to him ..... . . You wear pants don't you?
He said to me ... . ......... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him .. That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart
He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him .. ..... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him ... . They don't have time.
He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. .. I don't know; it has never happened.
He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.
He said to me...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said to him. .. .. A widow.
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him .. . .. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
I said to him ..... . . You wear pants don't you?
He said to me ... . ......... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him .. That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart
He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him .. ..... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him ... . They don't have time.
He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. .. I don't know; it has never happened.
He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.
He said to me...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said to him. .. .. A widow.
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him .. . .. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU MEET A QUEER PERSON:
HINTS FOR HETEROSEXUALS
1. Do not run screaming from the room. This is rude.
2. If you must back away, do so slowly and with discretion.
3. Do not assume she/he is attracted to you.
4. Do not assume he/she is not attracted to you.
5. Do not assume that you are not attracted to her/him.
6. Do not expect him/her to be as excited about meeting a straight person as you may be about meeting a queer person.
7. Do not immediately start talking about your boy/girlfriend or husband/wife in order to make it clear that you are straight.
8. Do not ask them how they got that way. Instead, ask yourself how you got the way you are.
9. Do not assume they are dying to talk about being gay.
10. Do not expect them to refrain from talking about being gay.
11. Do not trivialize their experience by assuming it is a bedroom issue. They are gay twenty-four hours a day.
1. Do not run screaming from the room. This is rude.
2. If you must back away, do so slowly and with discretion.
3. Do not assume she/he is attracted to you.
4. Do not assume he/she is not attracted to you.
5. Do not assume that you are not attracted to her/him.
6. Do not expect him/her to be as excited about meeting a straight person as you may be about meeting a queer person.
7. Do not immediately start talking about your boy/girlfriend or husband/wife in order to make it clear that you are straight.
8. Do not ask them how they got that way. Instead, ask yourself how you got the way you are.
9. Do not assume they are dying to talk about being gay.
10. Do not expect them to refrain from talking about being gay.
11. Do not trivialize their experience by assuming it is a bedroom issue. They are gay twenty-four hours a day.
Men can fix anything.....
Speechless...
These are some of the best I have ever seen. That last one only a man could think of it!
Loose muffler? I can fix that! |
Missing a wheel? I can fix that! |
wtf? |
Wiper broken? I can fix that! |
Stove broken? I can fix that! |
Reception problems in the rain? I can fix that! |
Not right hand drive? I can fix that! |
Can't see the ATM screen? I can fix that! |
No Ice Chest? I can fix that! |
Can't afford a real GPS? I can fix that! |
Book shelf cracking under weight? I can fix that! |
Car stereo stolen? I can fix that! |
Electrical problems? I can fix that! |
New TV too big for the old cabinet? I can fix that! |
Seat Belt broken? I can fix that! |
No spoon? I can fix that! |
Wednesday, April 29, 2020
Unbelievable! A Black Deer!
Bob and Larry (and what the goat saw)
Once upon a time two guys, Bob and Larry, were walking through a forest and they came across this HUGE hole in the ground. They pondered the possibility of just how deep the hole might be. Bob said to Larry, “Larry, I bet we just need to throw a rock down in the hole and then we will know how deep it is.”
So Bob threw a rock in the hole. They waited and waited, and never heard a blasted thing. Larry said, “Bob, we need a bigger rock!”
So Larry went and found a bigger rock, it was almost as big as Bob. Larry hucked the rock in the hole and they waited. They waited some more, still not a blasted thing. Then Bob broke the silence by exclaiming, “We need something BIGGER!”
He went walking through the forest and came back with an old railroad tie, hoisted it above his head and threw it in the hole. They waited and waited, then out of no where this goat came running through the forest.
The goat was moving so fast Bob and Larry barely got a glimpse of it as it flew up in the air and jumped down the hole. Bob turned to Larry and said, “That is just about the strangest thing I’ve ever seen .”
Bob and Larry sat and pondered the speed of the goat for a couple of minutes and then along came farmer Randy. Randy asked Bob and Larry (with a thick Montana accent), “Have y’all seen a goat around here?”
Bob and Larry glanced at each other and then retold the story of the goat running through the forest and jumping into the hole. Randy, looking confused (as Montana ranchers named Randy usually are), responded (again with a thick Montana accent), “That couldn’t have been my goat… he was chained to a railroad tie.”
So Bob threw a rock in the hole. They waited and waited, and never heard a blasted thing. Larry said, “Bob, we need a bigger rock!”
So Larry went and found a bigger rock, it was almost as big as Bob. Larry hucked the rock in the hole and they waited. They waited some more, still not a blasted thing. Then Bob broke the silence by exclaiming, “We need something BIGGER!”
He went walking through the forest and came back with an old railroad tie, hoisted it above his head and threw it in the hole. They waited and waited, then out of no where this goat came running through the forest.
The goat was moving so fast Bob and Larry barely got a glimpse of it as it flew up in the air and jumped down the hole. Bob turned to Larry and said, “That is just about the strangest thing I’ve ever seen .”
Bob and Larry sat and pondered the speed of the goat for a couple of minutes and then along came farmer Randy. Randy asked Bob and Larry (with a thick Montana accent), “Have y’all seen a goat around here?”
Bob and Larry glanced at each other and then retold the story of the goat running through the forest and jumping into the hole. Randy, looking confused (as Montana ranchers named Randy usually are), responded (again with a thick Montana accent), “That couldn’t have been my goat… he was chained to a railroad tie.”
Zero to 200....
A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a new truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.
"Look!" she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less. And my birthday is coming up. You could surprise me."
So, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.
Services will be at Downing Funeral Home on Monday the 12th. Due to the condition of the body, this will be a closed casket service. Please send you donations to the "Think Before You Say Things To Your Wife"
Evolution of Dance
The funniest 6 minutes you will ever see! Remember how many of these you have done!
Tuesday, April 28, 2020
Blessed Be: A Wiccan Ceremony - Leahmoin (CD)
'Blessed Be' is a celebration of all that is natural and spiritual! Original Wiccan texts are sung by a female choir, accompanied by beautiful music. The first is an uplifting chant for casting a circle of protection, the second is absolutely mezmorizing, used to connect with Cerriden's cauldron of knowledge and inspiration and the third, whike relaxing, also pays homage to The One who created all that is. All three songs are long-playing and allow the singer or listener to tune into the Divine Presences in order to set the mood for sacred magick.
Maureen Bennett (Narrator), Maureen Bennett (Singer), Wout Folmer (Guitar (Bass)), Barbara Goedbloed (Singer), Fred Kosters (Gong), Fred Kosters (Keyboards), Fred Kosters (Producer), Fred Kosters (Engineer), Ineke Rem (Singer), Trui Simmelink (Singer), Bodhi Geerlings (Singer), Georgette Spuyman (Singer), Cock Witte (Singer).
This recording is a lovely addition to any gathering, or may be used for solitary practice. The music is so mesmerizing that it also provides a soothing backdrop for all kinds of meditation.
Amazon.com: List Price: $7.19
Maureen Bennett (Narrator), Maureen Bennett (Singer), Wout Folmer (Guitar (Bass)), Barbara Goedbloed (Singer), Fred Kosters (Gong), Fred Kosters (Keyboards), Fred Kosters (Producer), Fred Kosters (Engineer), Ineke Rem (Singer), Trui Simmelink (Singer), Bodhi Geerlings (Singer), Georgette Spuyman (Singer), Cock Witte (Singer).
This recording is a lovely addition to any gathering, or may be used for solitary practice. The music is so mesmerizing that it also provides a soothing backdrop for all kinds of meditation.
Amazon.com: List Price: $7.19
The Amphicar
The Amphicar was the only amphibious automobile ever mass-produced for sale to the public. The German vehicle was designed by Hanns Trippel, creator of the war-time Schwimmwagen and manufactured by the Quandt Group at Lübeck and at Berlin-Borsigwalde. Its name is a combination of "amphibious" and "car".
The powerplant was the 1.1 L (1147 cc/69 in³) engine from the British Triumph Herald. This engine predated the Triumph Slant-4, which was also found in the early SAAB 99. It comes with a power output of 43 hp (32 kW) at 4750 rpm. Called the "Model 770", the Amphicar could achieve speeds of 7 knots in the water and 70 mph (113 km/h) on land. Nevertheless, some would comment that it wasn't a very good car and not a very good boat either because of this modest performance in or out of water.
Production started in 1961, after 1963, cars were assembled from the parts which had been supplied for the over-estimated sales of 20,000 per year, and production ended in 1968. Most cars were sold in the United States. Cars were sold in the UK from 1964. Total production was 3,878 vehicles before the company folded.
Amphicars were plagued with reliability problems, including faulty waterproofing on the engine that occasionally caused it to seize while driving through water (just in case, Amphicars came with an oar) and rapid corrosion of most surfaces. The vehicles have been described as "marginal in water, and not too fun on land", due to the bathtub shaped structure. However, they are one of the few amphibious production cars. The amphicar works well in snow, but has many limitations otherwise.
*Wikipedia
--more-- http://www.amphicar.com/history.htm
Production started in 1961, after 1963, cars were assembled from the parts which had been supplied for the over-estimated sales of 20,000 per year, and production ended in 1968. Most cars were sold in the United States. Cars were sold in the UK from 1964. Total production was 3,878 vehicles before the company folded.
Amphicars were plagued with reliability problems, including faulty waterproofing on the engine that occasionally caused it to seize while driving through water (just in case, Amphicars came with an oar) and rapid corrosion of most surfaces. The vehicles have been described as "marginal in water, and not too fun on land", due to the bathtub shaped structure. However, they are one of the few amphibious production cars. The amphicar works well in snow, but has many limitations otherwise.
*Wikipedia
--more-- http://www.amphicar.com/history.htm
**Photo Credit D. B. Austen
Riddle Me This!
Monday, April 27, 2020
Old Cowboy
An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink.
As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."
She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women."
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."
As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."
She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women."
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."