Soft Water
Two young boys were out playing. One of them was showing off his new water pistol.
"Tell your mom you want one of these too. Then we can shoot water at each other!" he exclaimed.
" I don't think so," said the other boy. "My mom says we have hard water!"
Did You Say Four?
A football coach walked into the locker room before a big game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play."
The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this... What is two plus two?"
The player thought for a moment and then answered, "Four?"
"Did you say four?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he had given the right answer.
Suddenly, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
The Real Meaning of Hotel Slogans
Old world charm ................................. No bath
Options galore ................................... Nothing is included in the itinerary
No extra fees ..................................... No extras
Nominal fee ....................................... Outrageous charge
Standard ........................................... Sub-standard
Deluxe .............................................. Standard
Superior ............................................ One free shower cap
Cozy ................................................. Small
All the amenities ................................ Two free shower caps
Plush ................................................ Top and bottom sheets
I'll See You Later
Running into the house after school Tommy said to his mother, “Mom! Isn’t an ox a kind of a bull?”
“Yes, she replied.
“And doesn’t equine have something to do with horses?”
“That’s right,” she said.
Running out of the house, Tommy said, “I’ll see you later!”
“Why? Where are you going?” asked his mother.
“To some other town, I just heard in school that the equinox is coming and I don’t wanna be around when it gets here!”
It's All in the Delivery
Three comedians are shooting the breeze in the dressing room of a nightclub after a late gig. They've heard one another’s material so much that they've reached the point where they don’t need to say the jokes anymore to amuse each other, they just need to refer to each joke by a number.
“Number 37!” cracks the first comic, and the others break up.
“Number 53!” says the second person, and they howl.
Finally, it’s the third comic’s turn. “44!” he quips. He gets nothing. Crickets.
“What?” he asks, “Isn't 44 funny?”
“Sure, it’s usually hilarious,” they answer. “But the way you tell it…”
Two young boys were out playing. One of them was showing off his new water pistol.
"Tell your mom you want one of these too. Then we can shoot water at each other!" he exclaimed.
" I don't think so," said the other boy. "My mom says we have hard water!"
Did You Say Four?
A football coach walked into the locker room before a big game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we really need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play."
The player agreed, so the coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this... What is two plus two?"
The player thought for a moment and then answered, "Four?"
"Did you say four?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he had given the right answer.
Suddenly, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
The Real Meaning of Hotel Slogans
Old world charm ................................. No bath
Options galore ................................... Nothing is included in the itinerary
No extra fees ..................................... No extras
Nominal fee ....................................... Outrageous charge
Standard ........................................... Sub-standard
Deluxe .............................................. Standard
Superior ............................................ One free shower cap
Cozy ................................................. Small
All the amenities ................................ Two free shower caps
Plush ................................................ Top and bottom sheets
I'll See You Later
Running into the house after school Tommy said to his mother, “Mom! Isn’t an ox a kind of a bull?”
“Yes, she replied.
“And doesn’t equine have something to do with horses?”
“That’s right,” she said.
Running out of the house, Tommy said, “I’ll see you later!”
“Why? Where are you going?” asked his mother.
“To some other town, I just heard in school that the equinox is coming and I don’t wanna be around when it gets here!”
It's All in the Delivery
Three comedians are shooting the breeze in the dressing room of a nightclub after a late gig. They've heard one another’s material so much that they've reached the point where they don’t need to say the jokes anymore to amuse each other, they just need to refer to each joke by a number.
“Number 37!” cracks the first comic, and the others break up.
“Number 53!” says the second person, and they howl.
Finally, it’s the third comic’s turn. “44!” he quips. He gets nothing. Crickets.
“What?” he asks, “Isn't 44 funny?”
“Sure, it’s usually hilarious,” they answer. “But the way you tell it…”
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