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Thursday, August 25, 2016

You can't read this and stay in a bad mood!

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
--Unique Up On It.


2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
--Tame Way, Unique Up On It.


3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
--They Take The Psycho Path


4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
--You Boil The Hell Out Of It.


5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
--Dam!


6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
--Polaroid's


7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
--A Stick


8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
--Nacho Cheese.


9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
--Subordinate Clauses.


10.What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
--Quattro Sinko..


11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
--Spoiled Milk.


12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
--Frostbite.


13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
--A Nervous Wreck.


14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
--Anyone Can Roast Beef.


15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
--Right Where You Left Him.


16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
--Because They Have Big Fingers.


17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
--Because It Scares The Dog.


18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
--Sanka.


19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
--The Location Of The Dirt Bag.


20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
--Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.


21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
--A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
--A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.


22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
--Either way, Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer


Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile.

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