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Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Fortunes

fortune cookie - meh
A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.
A bachelor is a guy who is footloose and fiancee free.
A beautiful woman will enrich your life soon.
A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.
A boy gets to be a man when a man is needed.
A bureaucrat is a politician with tenure.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
A company is known by the men it keeps.
A dead man cannot bite.
A fair exterior is a silent recommendation.
A fool and his honey are soon parted.
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
A gift of flour will soon be made to you.
A gift of flowers will soon be made to you.
A girl's best friend is her mutter.
A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet.
A good memory does not equal pale ink.
A good reputation is more valuable than money.
A guy has to get fresh once in a while so the girl doesn't lose her confidence.
A half moon is better than no moon at all.
A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.
A horse! A horse! My kingdom for a horse!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.
A king's castle is his home.
A large dog will have a surprising effect on your life.
A lie in time saves nine.
A light wife doth make a heavy husband.
A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.
A lost ounce of gold may be found, a lost moment of time never.
A man who fishes for marlin in ponds will put his money in Etruscan bonds.
A man who turns green has eschewed protein.
A man with 3 buttocks.
A man with one watch knows what time it is--with two watches he is never sure.
A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small package.
A man, a plan, a canal. Suez!
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer.
A misguided platypus will lay its eggs in your shorts.
A moose once bit my sister.
A muth once bit my sister.
A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the pants.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
A plucked goose does not lay golden eggs.
A private sin is not so prejudicial in the world as a public indecency.

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