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Monday, April 19, 2010

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD


THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD?

Well, it's sh*t ... that's right, sh*t! sh*t may just be the most functional word in the English language.

Consider:

You can get sh*t-faced, Be sh*t-out-of-luck, Or have sh*t for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your sh*t together, find a place for your sh*t, or be asked to sh*t or get off the pot.

You can smoke sh*t, buy sh*t, sell sh*t, lose sh*t, find sh*t, forget sh*t, and tell others to eat sh*t.

Some people know their sh*t, while others can't tell the difference between sh*t and shineola.

There are lucky sh*ts, dumb sh*ts, and crazy sh*ts. There is bull sh*t, horse sh*t, and chicken sh*t.

You can throw sh*t, sling sh*t, catch sh*t, shoot the sh*t, or duck when the sh*t hits the fan.

You can give a sh*t or serve sh*t on a shingle.

You can find yourself in deep sh*t or be happier than a pig in sh*t.

Some days are colder than sh*t, some days are hotter than sh*t, and some days are just plain sh*tty.

Some music sounds like sh*t, things can look like sh*t, and there are times when you feel like sh*t.

You can have too much sh*t, not enough sh*t, the right sh*t, the wrong sh*t or a lot of weird sh*t.

You can carry sh*t, have a mountain of sh*t, or find yourself up sh*t creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to sh*t and other times you fall in a bucket of sh*t and come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language.

And remember, once you know your sh*t, you don't need to know anything else!!

You could pass this along, if you give a sh*t; or not do so if you don't give a sh*t!

Well, sh*t, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a sh*t and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of sh*t. But, if you happened to catch a load of sh*t from some sh*t-head...........

Well, Sh*t Happens!!

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