There is a lake in Massachusetts where the name is a Native American word that means 'You fish on your side, I'll fish on my side, nobody fish in the middle.' It's called:
AND There is a lake in Massachusetts that goes by that name. But the explanation of its meaning is incorrect. Larry Dale, editor of the Webster Times, made up the fanciful etymology for an article he wrote in 1921. He meant it as a joke, but people took his story seriously and continue to repeat it to this day. The long name actually means something like, 'the fishing place at the boundaries and neutral meeting grounds.' The body of water in question is more commonly referred to as Lake Webster.
Monday, January 31, 2005
There is a lake in Massachusetts where the name is a Native American word that means 'You fish on your side, I'll fish on my side, nobody fish in the middle.' It's called:
(Ottawa) Conservative Leader Stephen Harper's position on gay marriage may play well with most of his MPs on the surface, but it exposes deep divisions that remain after the Canadian Alliance and Progressive Conservative wedding.
While former Alliance members appear comfortable with Harper's decision to launch an ad campaign against same-sex marriage, many ex-Tories are decidedly uncomfortable. Marie-Josee Lapointe, former press secretary to Tory Prime Minister Brian Mulroney, calls Harper's stance "bad strategy that's left me completely flabbergasted."
"Have we no respect for the rule of law? . . . We are supposed to be the party that stands for the rights of individuals. Times have changed and it's time we changed with them."
Lapointe, whose public relations company is doing work for social groups opposed to the Conservative position, said the courts have made clear what their interpretation of the law is and Harper should accept that.
"The ad says: 'Where do you draw the line?' How about right here, Mr. Harper?" she said.
"We've found a way to divide the nation when we should be looking at ways of uniting it."
There are also doubts in Atlantic Canada, where the four provinces are run by Conservative premiers.
"This is bizarre, way out there," said a senior adviser to Nova Scotia Premier John Hamm.
Hamm has not spent five minutes on the issue, nor has it ever come up in any meaningful way, said the official, who spoke on condition of anonymity.
"The strategy has got our political people just shaking their heads. Is this where you draw the line, really? How about dealing with issues that really affect our lives."
Harper's strategy has also raised concerns on another level as well.
His decision to launch the ads without consulting his deputy leader, Nova Scotia MP Peter MacKay, reignited talk in some circles about just how involved former Progressive Conservatives are in the new party's direction.
MacKay has said the ads took him by surprise.
Harper has also drawn criticism for musing that gay marriage could lead to legalized polygamy.
Tory Brad Green, New Brunswick's attorney general, moved quickly to dispel that suggestion, but he would not pass judgment on Harper's tactics.
"Polygamy is not an issue I have heard raised by anyone in the province of New Brunswick," he said.
©Canadian Press 2005
(Ottawa) American evangelists are urging Canadians to oppose same-sex marriage. The anti-gay groups are using Christian broadcasters to spread the message.
Earlier this week, James Dobson, chairman of the Colorado-based Focus on the Family, in a broadcast heard on 130 radio stations across Canada denounced the government of Prime Minister Paul Martin which will bring in a same-sex marriage bill next week.
"Your prime minister, Paul Martin, has recently done things to subvert the will of the people," Dobson said.
"It is clear here in the United States that the American people do not want same-sex marriage," Dobson continued. "I would hope that Canadians who also do not want same-sex marriage would be encouraged by what has happened down here."
Dobson told listeners that same-sex marriage is not a human rights issue and that passing such a law would destroy the institution of marriage and undermine society.
Dobson concluded his broadcast by calling on Canadians to pray on the issue and to donate money to Focus on the Family.
The organization has set up a Canadian website with form letters that people can download to send to their member of Parliament.
Alex Munter of Canadians for Equal Marriage said Dobson is trying to impose American values on the Canadian political system.
Munter said conservative American groups are worried about the long-term effect of a Canadian same-sex marriage law on the United States.
"It is very important for Canadians to know that there is a tremendous influence by American organizations and by American far-right groups who are trying to affect the outcome of what should be a Canadian decision," Munter told Sun newspapers.
"Those who support discrimination in the United States know that when Canada respects equality, when Canada upholds the Charter of Rights, it undermines their arguments," he said.
The same-sex marriage bill is expected to pass Parliament. A Sun Media poll shows at least 135 members of parliament intend to vote in favor of the bill. Some 102 MPs say they will vote against it and 19 are undecided.
(Montreal, Quebec) Two lesbians who were assaulted as they kissed on a Montreal street a week ago have returned to the spot, this time surrounded by dozens of other smooching same-sex couples.
Joelle Perras, 26, and Brook Morrison, 29, were walking hand in hand January 21 when they puckered up at a traffic light.
Somebody then hit Morrison in the head from behind, pushing her into Perras, who broke her nose. The man then fled without saying anything.
"Something happens like this, it doesn't just kind of leave," said Perras, yellow and purple bruises still visible on her face.
"Here we are, we're being strong, but it's scary. When we walk out at night, we look around. We haven't kissed on the street, we haven't been ourselves because we are afraid."
"This is not a protest or a demonstration. This is an act that I and my partner decided we want to take on for ourselves in order to come back to the corner and to feel safe in our community."
Other same-sex couples, mostly young women, joined in the celebration, kissing and chanting at a busy corner in the trendy Plateau Mont-Royal district, home to a sizable gay population.
"One, Two, Three, Four, We Just Want To Kiss Some More. Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Kissing Girls Is Really Great," they sang over and over.
Morrison said it was important for her and her partner to go public with the incident in order to help eliminate such acts in the future.
"It probably does happen more than we hear about and that was one of the reasons why we decided we need to tell our friends, tell people this happened," Morrison said.
"But it is surprising that it happened in Montreal and at this corner in this area."
Nobody has been arrested in the case. Morrison said police told them there isn't enough information to launch an investigation because there are no witnesses and no detailed description of the assailant.
Morrison said she doesn't believe the man who barreled into them was directly influenced by the ongoing public debate over same-sex marriage in Canada.
As news of the kiss-in spread across the country more than a dozen gays and lesbians held a similar kiss-in in downtown Toronto.
*by Donald McKenzie, Canadian Press
(Stony Point, New York) Students at a suburban New York City middle school have come to SpongeBob's defense. About a half-dozen students at James A. Farley Middle School in Stony Point donned SpongeBob SquarePants clothing Friday to support the cartoon character's right to be himself.
Earlier this month Christian fundamentalists declared that a pro-tolerance music video featuring SpongeBob and aimed at school kids has a gay subtext. The video will be sent to 61,000 elementary schools in March.
"On the surface, the project may appear to be a worthwhile attempt to foster greater understanding of cultural differences," said Ed Vitagliano editor of the Mississippi-based American Family Association's monthly newsletter.
"However, a short step beneath the surface reveals that one of the differences being celebrated is homosexuality."
Then James Dobson, chairman of Focus on the Family, weighed in during a speech to about 350 people in at a pre-inauguration event in Washington telling them that SpongeBob is anti-family.
The assertions from the Christian right brought scorn from the producers of the video and from moderate church groups.
Friday's demonstration at Farley Middle School was organized by seventh-grade class president Jordan Uffer.
The students wore a variety of clothing bearing depictions of SpongeBob.
"He's a cartoon," the 12-year-old Uffer told the Journal News. "I felt there was no reason for them to say that he was homosexual, and there isn't a real difference between gay people and not-gay people. We're all human beings."
Wearing his SpongeBob pajamas Uffer told the Journal News that "SpongeBob has no idea what's going on in life, and he has fun with everything."
"Me and my parents were watching the news, and we saw that a few religious groups were saying it's homosexual. I got mad," Uffer said. "I asked my Student Council supervisors if we could do a SpongeBob Support Day and they said yes."
One of the reasons Uffer got his go-ahead was that the school participated this week in No Name Calling Week, said Farley Principal Alice Gottlieb.
"This whole SpongeBob thing came to the kids because of that," Gottlieb said. "They're just great kids. It just bothered them."
Sunday, January 30, 2005
When the English pilgrims landed in the New World they were surprised to discover that one of the first Native Americans they met had lived in England for many years.
The story of Squanto, the English-speaking Native American whom the Pilgrims met when they disembarked from the Mayflower, is one of the stranger tales American history has to offer. Squanto had been taken from his village by a British captain around 1605. He lived in England for nine years and was sold into slavery in Spain in 1614. He eventually made his way back to England, and from there back to Massachusetts in 1619. By that time he had crossed the Atlantic a total of six times, making him far better traveled than the Pilgrims who arrived soon thereafter. By the Pilgrims' own admission they would have had difficulty surviving their first years in Massachusetts without the help of Squanto.
A Taiwanese company has introduced a new service allowing men to order tailor-made size condoms.
SakuNet International makes 55 different sizes of condoms from just three inches long to 9.4 inches, reports Sina News.
The company says the most popular condom sold in Taiwan is 4.2 inches long and 1.9 inches in diameter.
Company manager Huang Wanting says uncomfortable condoms can easily break or slip, adding to the risk of infection or pregnancy.
Men can log onto the company's website and download and print out the length measurement card so they can order the most appropriate condom.
Huang says that since they introduced the service, there have been more than 20,000 downloads of the measurement card, and they have sold 5,000 dozens of condoms in different sizes.
To avoid embarrassment, the measurement card has no numbers on it to indicate an actual size, but unified serial numbers.
The serial number for the largest, (9.5 inches long, 2.5 inches in diameter) is G22, and the smallest (3 inches long, 1.6 inches in diameter) is J33.
Girls Aloud have confirmed they are to play London's G-A-Y club.
They will play the club on Saturday, February 19, ahead of the release of their new single, Wake Me Up, due the following Monday, February 21.
The band begin their first major UK tour at the Pavillion, Rhyl, on May 3.
The tour also includes concerts in Nottingham, Brighton, Plymouth, Cardiff, Oxford, Blackpool, Glasgow, Edinburgh, Newcastle, Manchester, Sheffield, Birmingham, Briston, Portsmouth, Ipswich, Liverpool and London.
Girls Aloud are nominated in for Best Pop Act at next month's Brit Awards at London's Earls Court on February 9.
Avirl Lavigne, Natasha Bedingfield, McFly and Westlife are also nominated.
They are due to perform at Childline 2005, at The Point, Dublin, on the 30 Janurary.
YIKES! ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 CASE OF THE PREGNANT LADY
A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused.
When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court. The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself. The man replied, "Well your Honor, it was like this:
a. When the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat under a sweets sign that said, "The Double Mint Twins are coming" and I grinned.
b. Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, "Logan's Liniment will reduce the swelling", and I had to smile.
c. Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,"William's Big Stick Did the Trick", and I could hardly contain myself.
d. BUT, your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, "Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident." I just lost it."
Saturday, January 29, 2005
Sir Thomas Crapper invented the toilet.
, , and more . Thomas Crapper was a real person, who operated a plumbing business in 19th century London, but he didn’t invent the flush toilet. This is credited, instead, to Joseph Adamson, who took out the first patent for a flush toilet in 1853. A 1969 book by Wallace Reyburn, Flushed with Pride: The Story of Thomas Crapper, has helped to propagate the myth that Crapper was the inventor of the toilet. Reyburn’s biography of Crapper is simply a fabrication.
Friday, January 28, 2005
A dog had followed his owner to school. His owner was a fourth grader at a public elementary school.
When the bell rang, the dog sidled inside the building and made it all the way to the child's classroom with him before a teacher noticed him and shoo'ed him back outside, and closing the door behind him.
The dog sat down outside the door, whimpering and staring at the closed doors and not understanding in the least as to why he was refused entry.
Then - God appeared beside the dog, patted him on the head to comfort him, and said, "Don't feel bad fella'.... they won't let ME in there either."
When an old lady died in the geriatric ward of a small hospital near Dundee, Scotland, it was believed that she had nothing left of any value.
Later, when the nurses were going through her meager possessions, they found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.
One nurse took her copy to Ireland.
The old lady's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News Magazine of the North Ireland Association for Mental Health.
A slide presentation has also been made based on her simple, but eloquent, poem.
And this little old Scottish lady, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this "anonymous" poem winging across the Internet:
What do you see, nurses?
What do you see?
What are you thinking
When you're looking at me?
A crabby old woman,
Not very wise,
Uncertain of habit,
With faraway eyes?
Who dribbles her food
And makes no reply
When you say in a loud voice,
"I do wish you'd try!"
Who seems not to notice
The things that you do,
And forever is losing
A stocking or shoe?
Who, resisting or not,
Lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding,
The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking?
Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse,
You're not looking at me.
I'll tell you who I am
As I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding,
As I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of ten
With a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters,
Who love one another.
A young girl of sixteen
With wings on her feet
Dreaming that soon now
A lover she'll meet.
A bride soon at twenty,
My heart gives a leap,
Remembering the vows
That I promised to keep
At twenty-five now,
I have young of my own,
Who need me to guide
And a secure happy home.
A woman of thirty,
My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other
With ties that should last.
At forty, my young sons
Have grown and are gone,
But my man's beside me
To see I don't mourn.
At fifty once more,
Babies play round my knee,
Again we know children,
My loved one and me.
Dark days are upon me,
My husband is dead,
I look at the future,
I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing
Young of their own,
And I think of the years
And the love that I've known.
I'm now an old woman
And nature is cruel;
'Tis jest to make old age
Look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles,
Grace and vigor depart,
There is now a stone
Where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass
A young girl still dwells,
And now and again,
My battered heart swells.
I remember the joys,
I remember the pain,
And I'm loving and living
Life over again.
I think of the years
All too few, gone too fast,
And accept the stark fact
That nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people,
Open and see,
Not a crabby old woman;
Look closer . . . see ME!!
Remember this poem when you next meet an old person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within . . we will all, one day, be there, too!
PLEASE SHARE THIS POEM. IT'S SOMETHING WE ALL NEED TO READ.
Bill owns a company that manufactures and installs car wash systems. (Magic Wand Car Wash Systems, just in case you want to buy one.) Bill's company installed a car wash system in Frederick, Md. Now understand that these are complete systems, including the money changer and money taking machines.
The problem started when the new owner complained to Bill that he was losing significant amounts of money from his coin machines each week.
He went as far as to accuse Bill's employees of having a key to the boxesand ripping him off.
Bill just couldn't believe that his people would do that, so they setup a camera to catch the thief in action. Well, they did catch him on film!
That's a bird sitting on the change slot of the machine.
The bird had to go down into the machine, and back up inside to get to the money!
That's three quarters he has in his beak! Another amazing thing is that it was not just one bird -- there were several working together. Once they identified the thieves, they found over $4000 in quarters on the roof of the car wash and more under a nearby tree.
And you thought you heard of everything by now!!!
An elderly couple is sitting together watching television.
During one of those commercials, the husband asked his wife, "Whatever happened to our sexual relations?"
After a long thoughtful silence, the wife replied during the next commercial. "You know, I don't know. I don't even think we got a Christmas card from them this year!"
Smart Ass Answer #5:
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
Smart Ass Answer #4:
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Smart Ass Answer #3:
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Smart Ass Answer #2:
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."
AND NOW........FOR THE..........
#1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2004........................
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
*Thanks. Auntie 'M'
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Dolly Parton met her husband, Carl Dean, at a Laundromat®.
She met Dean on one of her first days in Nashville, Tennessee, at a Wishy Washy Laundromat. The couple married two years later, in 1966, when Parton was 20 years old. Parton fans know little about Dean, a contractor, who is reluctant to appear in public.
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 140 kilometers an hour, sir." The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 110, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."
As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you keep quiet for once?" The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did."
As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep quiet?"
The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine." The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket." The wife says, Now, Dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."
And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??" The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?
I love this part....
"Only when he's been drinking."
GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD:
1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
As I've Matured...
I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in...
I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.
I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things. I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back. I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.
I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent.
Pass this webpage along to 5 friends...trust me, they'll appreciate it. Who knows, maybe something good will happen.
*Thanks, Auntie 'M'
1. You never meet any celebrities except maybe "Theresa Sokyrka or The Cottonpickers " or the Johner Bros !
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
3. "Vacation" means going to Moose Jaw Spa.
4. You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.
5. You measure distance in hours.
6. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
7. Your classes were cancelled because of cold.
8. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
9. You use (or need) a down comforter in the summer.
10. Your grandparents drive at 100/km per hour through 13 feet of snow and raging blizzard - without flinching.
11. You plan your financial future around bingo.
12. You see people wear hunting clothes at social events.
13. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
14. You think of the major four food groups as deer meat, beer,fish and saskatoons.
15. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
16. There are always 4 empty cars running in the parking lot at the beer store at any given time.
17. You only own 3 spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
18. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
19. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow
20. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
21. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pyjamas.
22. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
23 You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter and Construction.
24. It takes 3 hours to go to the mall for one item even when you're in a rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town.
25. You actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your friends from Saskatchewan
We is FRIENDS!
This is cute and I'll bet it brings a smile to your face because WE IS FRIENDS
Me And You Is Friends ...
You Smile, I Smile ....
You Hurt, I Hurt ....
You Cry, I Cry ...
You Jump Off A Bridge ...
I Gonna Miss You
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
The United States was undefeated in the Americas Cup for 132 years.
The New York Yacht Club lost the cup for the first time to Australia in 1983, after winning every race since the competition began in 1851. The cup race originated in England, where the first exhibition was held, but the British have never won the event.